Cautiously dipping a toe in here...

[dukemama]

Originally Posted by Jen

It only takes one bad apple to ruin the whole bunch.

To the OP - to ignore your best contact and best opportunity in favour of seeking help here is very shortsighted.

I hope I didn't give you the impression of "shopping" around on GC for a sorority to join -- that's not my intention. My original question simply asked about the typical ages of women who AI versus those who join non-collegiate organizations.

And honestly, I don't believe XYZ sorority IS my best opportunity regardless of what my friend said at our college reunion. I can't, with a clear conscience, attempt to join a group where I know specific members did not wish me to belong. It's a matter of personal pride, I guess.

[AChiOhSnap]

Originally Posted by dukemama

I hope I didn't give you the impression of "shopping" around on GC for a sorority to join -- that's not my intention. My original question simply asked about the typical ages of women who AI versus those who join non-collegiate organizations.

And honestly, I don't believe XYZ sorority IS my best opportunity regardless of what my friend said at our college reunion. I can't, with a clear conscience, attempt to join a group where I know specific members did not wish me to belong. It's a matter of personal pride, I guess.

Nope, you didn't give me that impression, especially since you said that you were only interested in one NPC sorority. XYZ only entered the picture because it seemed unusual that you would be interested in an NPC where you knew nobody versus XYZ, in which you had close friends. But you don't have to explain why you're not interested in XYZ.

Good luck in your pursuit of a non-collegiate sorority! Keep us updated.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by dukemama

And honestly, I don't believe XYZ sorority IS my best opportunity regardless of what my friend said at our college reunion. I can't, with a clear conscience, attempt to join a group where I know specific members did not wish me to belong. It's a matter of personal pride, I guess.

What if you had received a bid from XYZ, everything is going wonderful, and then had your ex-roomie tell you "I did everything I could to get you cut, I wish I didn't have to call you sister." Would you have terminated your membership? Or would you have tried to work it out or at the very least, agreed to coexist and stay out of each other's way?

I knew there were specific members who wished I wasn't a sister as a collegian. I know there are specific members who think the same of me as an alum. Am I going to let them chase me out of being involved? Hell no.

It just sounds like you are way too hung up on something that happened DECADES ago. Is this woman involved with your local alumnae chapter at all? Is she a national officer or volunteer of any sort? Is she an involved alumna of your school? If the answers are no, you're probably never going to cross her path again. So why would you let her opinion ruin something you want to go for in the here and now?

Sororities are not all roses and daisies. No one is going to like every single one of her sisters, every time every where, unless her chapter is very small or her brain is very small.

Don't let pride stand in the way of something that could make you happy.

[dukemama]

Originally Posted by 33girl

What if you had received a bid from XYZ, everything is going wonderful, and then had your ex-roomie tell you "I did everything I could to get you cut, I wish I didn't have to call you sister." Would you have terminated your membership? Or would you have tried to work it out or at the very least, agreed to coexist and stay out of each other's way?

I knew there were specific members who wished I wasn't a sister as a collegian. I know there are specific members who think the same of me as an alum. Am I going to let them chase me out of being involved? Hell no.

It just sounds like you are way too hung up on something that happened DECADES ago. Is this woman involved with your local alumnae chapter at all? Is she a national officer or volunteer of any sort? Is she an involved alumna of your school? If the answers are no, you're probably never going to cross her path again. So why would you let her opinion ruin something you want to go for in the here and now?

Sororities are not all roses and daisies. No one is going to like every single one of her sisters, every time every where, unless her chapter is very small or her brain is very small.

Don't let pride stand in the way of something that could make you happy.

Point taken, 33girl. My freshman year roommate lives several states away and since graduation I've only seen her at reunions. She's been cordial to me at those events. More than her opinion of me, however, was the concern that the GLO could somehow find out about her rejection of my membership if I pursued AI with them (I was assured in a prior post that that would be unlikely). It looks like it may be a moot point anyway, since according to the moderator's list on this forum XYZ sorority rarely conducts AI if at all.

I appreciate the reality check, though...I mean that sincerely.

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by dukemama

according to the moderator's list on this forum XYZ sorority rarely conducts AI if at all.

I would take that list with a BOULDER SIZED "grain of salt" - those are not official postions on AI. Although I believe most of those on there that say AI is rare are correct, please don't assume that the others that are not marked that way are open to AI.

[dukemama]

Originally Posted by AlphaFrog

Although I believe most of those on there that say AI is rare are correct, please don't assume that the others that are not marked that way are open to AI.

Rest assured, I never assume.