GPA Question *tricky*

[Miss{BooperDoo}]

Originally Posted by AChiOhSnap

HUH????

Wait you're 20 right now and you're going to go from 20 to 22 in the span of 12 mos? Did you mean April of 09 you're going to be 22? Sorry, I'm just a bit confused.

The two people below you have it figured out.

I asked a question about GPA requrments I did not ask for you opinion of me, or my grades, or my school. What, in my original question, made you possibly think I wanted that.

Theres more I could type here, but honestly, theres no reason to continue this. Thank you to those that offered helpful explanations. As to anyone who wants to reply to this from here on, it will be for your own amusment because this is the last time I'm going to be on this site. Its been proven to me (as I've read in other threads aside from my own, as well as in this one) that there are just some people who will never progress past the high school mentality.

Later.

[AChiOhSnap]

This isn't really directed at Miss BooperDoo since she's apparently not coming back, but I would like to let this thread serve as an example to PNMs looking for recruitment advice on GreekChat.

Plenty of PNMs post here asking for our advice on anything ranging from GPA requirements, to clothes, to whatever. When you offer up more information than necessary and we pick up on something that could potentially be extremely detrimental to your recruitment, we're going to tell you.

I'm sure that, in some cases, the advice and opinions have ended up not mattering and just came across as bitchy. In some other cases, PNMs have come to realize that the advice is correct and there's a problem that needs to be addressed.

When you put your personal information out there, people on GC can and will offer up their advice and opinions on your situation. Some of it, frankly, you might not like. I wouldn't necessarily say it's because people on GC have a "high school mentality" -- it's because GC isn't Smiley Happy Pony Rainbow Land. Whether or not that the fact we offer unsolicited advice and opinions is right or wrong is really irrelevant. If you don't want to hear what people have to say -- and they're not going to sugar coat it -- then don't post on GC.

I mean, for Chrissake, it's the internet. If you want rah-rah you go girl encouragement, talk to your mom.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by AChiOhSnap

GC isn't Smiley Happy Pony Rainbow Land. Whether or not that the fact we offer unsolicited advice and opinions is right or wrong is really irrelevant. If you don't want to hear what people have to say -- and they're not going to sugar coat it -- then don't post on GC.

I mean, for Chrissake, it's the internet. If you want rah-rah you go girl encouragement, talk to your mom.

This is why I love you.

But really, we like to give PNMs realistic advice based on the info they povide. If we told EVERY girl who came here (NO MATTER WHAT HER SITUATION) stuff like "OMG you should SO go for it! You'll totally get a bid." when it wasn't neccessarily true, we'd be doing them a disservice. Girls would be like "Why didn't they tell me that (for example) being a junior would make it almost impossible for me to get a bid?" We're not mean, just honest.

[UGAalum94]

I probably wouldn't have said high school mentality either, but sometimes things become uncivil, and I'm not sure that GreekChat needs to be that way in the advice threads.

I'm not sure that we should allow ourselves to get dragged into negative back and forth with PNMs who don't want to take advice. (I'm sure I'm as guilty as anybody.)

I know that in a lot of the unpleasant recruitment threads, the original OP wants to argue with the advice she's getting, and that's going to be counterproductive for everyone, and a little infuriating when they act like they know more about greek life or college that you do. But sometimes, we just kind of go off on them when they're really not giving a lot of attitude but you can tell they're engaging in wishful thinking about their own circumstances.

We can't fix that, and I think, we run the risk of leaving a bad taste in their mouths about our GLOs if we're some of the GC users with that info. in our usernames. I'm not saying that it should be "Happy Pony Rainbow Land," was it, AChiOhSnap? But we should probably keep in mind that they're completely anonymous, but that some of us are unofficially representing our orgs.

Again, I know I'm not any better about this than anyone else, and I'm not suggesting that we lie to them. But we should make a point of not returning the attitude in kind, I think.

[texas*princess]

I agree w/ the posters above me.

But for what it's worth, when you come on here and post way too much info (it was the advisors fault that i couldn't pay for or pass my classes) people will pass judgement. That's life. Even if she went up to some random sorority girl in person and verbally said everything she typed here, opinions would be formed.

I agree that sometimes it feels like the OP only wants positive feedback ("Yea you will no doubt get a bid to the top house at UGA even though you're 22, you transfered every semester and couldn't pass your classes because you had to work during school hours!") and that really isn't how things are. Like Achiosnap said, that would be a huge disservice if realistically things don't look like they would end up that way.

[UGAalum94]

We should be realistic absolutely, but I think we should try not to let our anger and frustration show, even when the posters are jerks.

Imagine that the OPs are the world's worst recruitment guests and they are acting the same way at the parties that they act here. I still think a group member would be better off trying not to reply in kind, especially because other PNMs will see her response and unfortunately maybe form connections between the angry behavior and the group.

I'm not saying that we need to stifle ourselves generally in all the other areas of GreekChat or lie to PNMs here, but we should do our best not to lose it on them or rip them and their situation to shreds, even when they seem to deserve it, because of how it make us look to other PNMs who might have the same thoughts or concerns.

[texas*princess]

agreed. i think sometimes it is so hard because the OP gets all angry that we didn't give them the "Rainbow Flower Pony Land" (or whatever that was.. haha) answer that they wanted to hear.

[AChiOhSnap]

Originally Posted by Alphagamuga

We can't fix that, and I think, we run the risk of leaving a bad taste in their mouths about our GLOs if we're some of the GC users with that info. in our usernames. I'm not saying that it should be "Happy Pony Rainbow Land," was it, AChiOhSnap? But we should probably keep in mind that they're completely anonymous, but that some of us are unofficially representing our orgs.

Again, I know I'm not any better about this than anyone else, and I'm not suggesting that we lie to them. But we should make a point of not returning the attitude in kind, I think.

You're absolutely right about the fact that most of us, at one time or another, have "returned the attitude" to a PNM or have been uncivil when it really wasn't called for. I think that needs to be addressed, absolutely.

That said, I'm not exactly sure that anyone really ripped on Missbooperdoo in this thread, nor was she really acting like the snotty know-it-all PNM like we've seen in so many other threads. I think it was a situation where GC posters worded things more strongly and more directly than she was used to, which put her off. She took offense to us offering up our opinions on her situation w/financial aid, her bouncing around from school to school, and her poor record of academic responsibility. While I understand that it's never nice to hear criticisms about the way in which you've handled your life, I really thought that most of the posters DID act civilly, at least, even when they weren't exactly warm about the whole thing.

I think the basic level of courtesy a new poster can expect to receive on GC is politeness. Some veteran GCers may choose to go above and beyond, but really, I don't think anyone in this particular thread ventured into blatant rudeness.

Don't get me wrong, I'm totally feeling what you're saying about positively representing our orgs, and while I'm aware that it was pretty obvious the OP didn't want to hear any unsolicited advice on her situation, I really hope that she'll at least take some of it into consideration next spring when she goes through recruitment. It probably wouldn't bode well for her chances at being placed she were to go into a recruitment party and say the same things she said here. To that end, at least, I think these threads can be helpful even when they end up pissing off the OP to the point that they have to make one of those dramatic exit posts. Yeah, she may never come back, but I really hope she at leasts mulls over what's said and chooses to reframe her situation a little more positively.

Anyway, I'm just rambling. I agree with you, alphagamuga, in most everything you said. I don't know if all of it is directly applicable to this particular thread, but I really think that it's applicable to a lot of recent recruitment thread examples. Some PNMs can take the heat and others can't so I'd still like this thread to serve as an example of TMI on GreekChat. Even when people have acted totally civilly and even kindly, PNMs have still completely lost it the second someone is like "No, honey, I really don't think any of the four sororities on your campus allow graduate students to pledge" and they're all like "Screw you guys, I guess greeks just aren't as welcoming as I'd hoped, blah blah blah, I'm never coming back here so don't even bother replying" and that gets old. I hope PNMs who really don't want to hear anything bad just avoid a whole thread like this entirely by either posting the bare minimum in terms of information or not posting on GC at all.

[UGAalum94]

No, I didn't think this thread was particularly bad either. I think I was more concerned about people responding to the OP's comments about high school, etc.

Let 'em have the last snip. We already joined groups. We're adult people. Either they will realize that the advice was good or maybe things will work out a lot better than we fear for them. It's really nothing to us if they take it or not.

I find it ironic that the OP will be rushing at the same school where the first known and recorded GC-related rush disaster took place.

Yep.

[Miss{BooperDoo}]

Okay, I know I ended this rather badly. All replies after this that include "thought you said..." will be read, no worries Long weekend coupled with not knowing much about the way Greek Chat works has turned what should have been a simple question into something of a cat fight. I never expected everything to be...rainbows and sunshine? Can't remember that one. But I did expect advice on the topic I posted, not about my life. I'm not looking to argue with anyone over something that was posted on the internet. Truth be told, before I got in this paticular thread I posted numerous times about how I wasn't even sure I wanted to go greek. I got really definsive in this, and came across as some what of a...well bitch. (But there was much provocation)
And I feel like I also gave the impression I'm dead set on joining a sorority. Which can't be farther from the truth. It just seemed like something worth finding out more about. I do stand firm on the fact that you should never judge someone, especially someone you know over the internet so quickly, and expect them to take it with a smile and a "wow...your negative opinion of me makes me so happy!"...rainbows and sunshine.... But thats besides the point I'm trying to make. I've never threatened anyone on this site, and don't much care WHAT organization you belong to.

Originally Posted by Alphagamuga

But we should probably keep in mind that they're completely anonymous, but that some of us are unofficially representing our orgs.

Not saying there was an insinuation that there would be bad mouthing going on here, but I would like to address the issue. In all likelyhood, I won't even be pledging. I'm not going to college for Greek life, I never said I was, I had just expressed an interest in it, that turned into a heated defense of my interest in it.

To address the issue about USA, though its been the University I have until now planned to attend, recent events (ha, so recent as in this past weekend) have pushed me in another direction...another state even Without being too detailed about my personal life, its just a great (huge) change in plans that wasn't expected and I'm going to be having way to much going on in my life for anything as time consuming as a sorority. I'm not even sure if I'm going to be attending a college/university that HAS a greek system. As I've yet to look into the schools in that area. Just too excited to function I guess lol.

Anyway just wanted to say that I might hang around here for awhile and read through some of the rush stories, because they are fun to read. Granted I could just view them without signing in, but I'm sure I'll comment on something.

Later

[UGAalum94]

I didn't mean that you would try to retaliate in some way. I didn't see any sort of threatening behavior from you. My point was that we ought to think about how we present ourselves because of the impressions that people form as a result. I meant directly from reading what we said, not because anyone was going to repeat the story or intentionally use it

[Miss{BooperDoo}]

You concern is definatly understandable, as in this paticular thread it was more on a person to person level that there were issues, forget the greek end of it. I was having issues with the way someone reacted to my question, and it would often be better if there was a way to blind people to the greek letters in your name so they didnt assume it was a representation of that organization. Hope that makes sense...