VTMom

[Xylochick216]

Just wanted to say good luck to your daughter. About half of the people from my graduating class went to Tech, and many of them joined sororities. They're all really happy they did because they said it gave them a community within the school since the school is so huge. Feel free to PM me if you have any questions

[violetpretty]

Does your daughter know anyone who is a collegiate or alumna member of a sorority at VA Tech? They could give her a good perspective on joining sororities at VA Tech.

A few women who I went to high school joined chapters at VA Tech as sophomores, and I could be wrong because I am not particularly close with either, but I highly doubt they had any recs. I would do some research on the campus greek culture about recs before you dive in. They could end up being useful and worth the time or they could turn out to be a HUGE waste of time. Some people will say "oh, recs never hurt, get them anyway," but at some schools recs would be seen as an annoyance or arrogant like "why do alumnae think they can choose my sisters" sort of attitude.

I know that many women at my campus (Maryland) register hours before the deadline (i.e. they're not gathering recs) and still end up with a bid. Some chapters don't have a reference chair, and the ones that do generally joke about it not being an actual position. Now I am not saying that just because Maryland and VT are both ACC schools that the greek culture is the same. But I can guarantee you that you are not dealing with a school like UGA where a potential new member would be dead without recs.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by GeekyPenguin

Yep, that's what it is - I come from a smaller chapter (when I was there, we had 7 girls living in a 4 bedroom house) and we asked everyone in the chapter who didn't live in to pay parlor fees to help cover the electricity, cable, internet, and incidentals around the house since they were often there and using them. Our parlor fees also included laundry privileges at the house.

Be sure to get clarity on this one, because it can be a recurring expense that you pay every semester you are not living in the chapter house, or it can be a one-time fee. On my campus, it was the latter for most groups.

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

I think in the south recs seem to be more important. But I agree with an earlier post that you might want to ask a Greek alum about recs, and see what the local attitude toward them is. My mom was like you, doing everything before hand, but she had it a little easier because she was Greek...but your daughter will have a much easier recruitment for it! I really think I had it easy when I went through because my mom worked on it so hard. Good luck to her!!!!

[NUBlue&Blue]

I would advise getting as many recs as possible, even though the website says they are not necessary. My daughter goes to an ACC school, and in my opinion, it never hurts to have your name known before you get there. It's easy for great girls to fall through the cracks if they walk in totally unknown--not that they won't get a bid somewhere, but why not take the time to maximize your options if being greek is something that you really want to do?

Yes, it does take a lot of time to gather recs--I spent a good part of the summer getting together recs for the 6 GLO's at my daughter's school, but I surely don't see it as a waste of time.

[amanda6035]

Originally Posted by PenguinTrax

that's nothing..check out the finances for the chapters at FSU:

http://greeklife.fsu.edu/PH/finances.html

I cant believe there is that much of a difference in the finances! Isn't it a better idea to have closely competitive prices? At my campus you cant say "Well, you pay more money but you get more stuff" bc it just doesnt work....Wouldnt it be sad for a girl to join one sorority over another JUST BECAUSE of the price? (and lets be honest, it happens...)

VTMom - make sure to have your daughter ask about FINING...many chapters that fine aren't up front and honest with their costs - if she misses an event, she might be forced to pay as a "punishment." It's sad, because I've known alot of new members who have quit their sorority, due to not being properly informed of how much money it was actually going to cost (and this is the sorority's fault for not being honest about it). I was Financial VP for two years, and the way I see it, the numbers they give you should be all inclusive, with the exceptions of extras that you have a choice to, or not to participate in, such as, if you want to buy a shirt from a mixer you attended. Sadly, many sororities do not share this same way of thinking.

[breukelen]

VTMom
As far as recommendations are concerned you may want to start talking about your daughter's intention to rush with your own friends and co-workers. You may know quite a few women who are sorority alumnae--if you bring it up to people they may offer to write a rec. for her.

[FSUZeta]

amanda, i see where you are coming from, and it certainly sounds like you have firsthand knowledge, having served as a vp finances, but i have to disagree with you on having vtmom's daughter ask about fining. if a pnm asked me that, i would be worried that she might be joining a sorority just to say she was in a sorority and she was looking for the sorority who would fine the least, or has other consequences for nonparticipation.

hopefully, when girls are going thru recruitment they are not already thinking about how they are going to get out of participating in sorority activities. as an advisor, i have heard sob stories from girls who "can't pay their dues" or how"can't afford to pay their fine", but who grab a starbucks everyday, and eat out at different restaurants several times a week where the average meal costs around $15. these girls are either just bad at managing their money, or their sorority obligations are not high on their priority list.

[33girl]

Once she has a bid - that's the time to ask about fines. Plus, being all inclusive or not and fining are 2 totally separate issues.

I personally don't care for the all inclusive thing - I would have been very upset if part of my dues paid for a very expensive formal that for one reason or the other I didn't get to attend. IMO, unless it's mandatory, your dues shouldn't pay for it - but I know for a lot of chapters that's not feasible.

[amanda6035]

Yeah, I get your point. It just really pisses me off, because...I was trying to avoid this, but I'm gonna say it anyway....we had to cut our dues DRASTICALLY in order to remain competitive with the "published dues" of other sororities on my campus. As a result, we have to be very very frugal about everything we do, and in some instances, we do take a chapter vote to say "hey, can everybody pitch in $10 for this event?" and it's okay. But then come to find out, there have been several girls, who depledge those other sororities bc they cant afford to pay the fines for whatever reason.

So my chapter has to scrimp and save in order to have fun events because we lowered costs to remain competitive with not-accurate published prices, and PNMs get screwed bc they dont know ther full financial obligations. And of course, my chapter cant say during formal recruitment "We dont fine - what you see on that financial poster on the wall is exactly what you're going to pay" because it will make us look like catty bitches. *grr*

[AChiOhSnap]

Originally Posted by amanda6035

And of course, my chapter cant say during formal recruitment "We dont fine - what you see on that financial poster on the wall is exactly what you're going to pay" because it will make us look like catty bitches. *grr*

You can't?

We were always totally upfront about our dues being all-inclusive. I don't think anyone ever held it against us or thought we were "catty" for saying that while AXO's dues might seem high as compared to some of the other sororities, we were all-inclusive and some of the other sororities' fees were "a la carte." The sororities that had lower dues were up-front with the fact that you pay for mixers, t-shirts, etc. as you went along. I dunno, it was never a problem.

[AlphaFrog]

I think they'd have to be EXTREMELY careful about the way they said it, and as we know, not everyone has that kind of tact in the heat of rush.

[Drolefille]

We had fines for missing required events, and they weren't a way to supplement our dues. They were a deterrent for girls who thought "you know, it'd be more fun to go to this party tonight and stay out late and just be 'sick' for initiation tomorrow" or who thought that required meant "only required if I my boyfriend's not in town."

We certainly didn't fine girls JUST so that we could make some money. And extra community service hours were almost if not always an alternative to paying, as long as it was arranged appropriately.

And this is not to say the members receiving fines were "bad members" they were just college students. Sometimes it takes an incentive to get your priorities back in order. (There were of course acceptable excuses and a such, it wasn't just "You missed chapter OMG FINE!")


ETA: FINES are different from all inclusive dues. Our dues were all inclusive. We also fined. That's two different issues.

[amanda6035]

Yeah - it's just....one of those things. A camus as small as mine, it's hard enough to convince girls to come out to recruitment, the last thing you want to do is scare them away with finances....

Our president even suggested re-raising our dues - but there's no way we can feasibly do that and still give the appearance of being competitive. The PNMs on my campus look so closely at those kinds of details. I guess that's what happens when you're a school full of nerdy engineers

*tangent* Why is it that greek life gets such a bad rep for money? i mean, you have to pay dues to be in professional organizations and to play on the soccer team and crap like that - so why is money in greek life any different? The whole "I dont want to by my friends" syndrome....

Sorry VTMom, didnt mean to derail your topic.... Good luck to your daughter!

[AnchorAlumna]

The amount of fees depends on if there is a house involved, and how big that house is. At the University of Alabama, all new members eat all meals at their house, so my daughter's first semester bill 5 years ago came to around $2,200. That included pledging & initiation fees, parlor fee, an $80-a-semester fee for security guard that stayed at the house sunset to sunrise, meals and, of course, dues. It did not include the price of the badge or T shirts and photos for all the events. And it did not matter if you lived in an apartment across town, a dorm across campus or a room in the house - everybody pays for ALL meals.