Why you didn't make it into a sorority.

[dgdramadawg]

Originally Posted by jessXIca

women rushing panhellenic sororities cannot receive more than one bid

On my campus, it was possible to receive multiple snap bids or informal recruitment bids. However, it was not possible to receive multiple formal recruitment bids.

[Symbal]

I also have issue with "You did something wrong, that's why you were cut." But those of us who WERE cut will not know what that specific thing IS because we will never be told. How do we accept that, then expect to improve on it if we know nothing about what got us cut in the first place? Maybe it was my being too shy, or it very well could have been my pants were from old navy instead of Saks. The advice is so vague it's barely worth looking at.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by Symbal

I also have issue with "You did something wrong, that's why you were cut." But those of us who WERE cut will not know what that specific thing IS because we will never be told. How do we accept that, then expect to improve on it if we know nothing about what got us cut in the first place? Maybe it was my being too shy, or it very well could have been my pants were from old navy instead of Saks. The advice is so vague it's barely worth looking at.

I think you missed where achiosnap said:

"Don't let a thread on an internet message board cloud your opinion on Greek life. None of us know your school. It's up to you to sort through all the advice and opinions on Greek chat and decide for yourself what's applicable to your situation."

[AChiOhSnap]

Originally Posted by Symbal

I also have issue with "You did something wrong, that's why you were cut." But those of us who WERE cut will not know what that specific thing IS because we will never be told. How do we accept that, then expect to improve on it if we know nothing about what got us cut in the first place? Maybe it was my being too shy, or it very well could have been my pants were from old navy instead of Saks. The advice is so vague it's barely worth looking at.

Then don't look at it. That's kind of what I was getting at.

PNMs will never know why they're cut. It's not just because membership selection can't be discussed. It's because a lot of times the members themselves don't even know all the reasons. It's not like a sorority will hold up a picture of a PNM during voting and everyone will be like "OMG she wore Old Navy instead of True Religion jeans, she is SO cut."

Unless a PNM is a complete basketcase or is known as the biggest ho on campus, there's almost never one specific reason a PNM is cut. Suffice it to say, sometimes there's nothing you can do to "improve" because you probably don't need to improve... it's either a bad match or there are a limited number of spaces and the sorority has to take the best matches first.

This is a really bad analogy but here goes: pretend a man is trying to win your heart. He may be really nice, funny, cute, whatever but something just doesn't "click" with you. He's still a really great person, and you wish the best for him, but he's just not right for you. There's nothing he'd be able to do to "improve" so you'd be more likely to date him. It's not about his jeans or his shyness. It's just not a good personality match. A lot of times PNMs just don't click with a sorority either and it's not personal.

I hope that maybe sheds a little bit of perspective on this....you're only going to make yourself crazy if you try to figure out what you did "wrong" and get discouraged by anecdotes relayed on Greek Chat. I re-read your recruitment story and your posts since you tried COB and I know this has been really hard for you. If you want to try recruitment again, you probably shouldn't keep reading the bad rush stories and the "why you got cut" threads because it's only going to freak you out. These threads are only designed to give PNMs an "aha" moment as to why they got cut ("Oh, so Ole Miss sororities wouldn't bid a pregnant junior with a 2.2 GPA?"). If the advice doesn't make sense to you, it's probably because it doesn't apply.

Originally Posted by AChiOhSnap

Unless a PNM is a complete basketcase or is known as the biggest ho on campus, there's almost never one specific reason a PNM is cut.

You might also want to add "too much airing of grievances on GreekChat" to that list.

Just sayin'. Especially if the PNM is going to make another attempt to rush and hopes to be successful this time around.

[daydreamer1112]

Wow achiohsnap, I'm proud to call you my sister! Thanks for the amazing advice--I could have used a voice like yours when I was rushing and wondering why some houses cut me.