Colorstruck Ideas

[pinkies up]

I must be really messed up! Being bi-racial, I always HATED being so light skinned. I wanted to be darker like my friends and was always offended when they called me "white girl". I stayed in the sun for hours until all I got was an awful sunburn. I tried to remove myself from anything white; ya'll, I even tried to get a jehri curl!!! (that was awful...) When I became older, I found myself asking guys was the only reason they were attracted to me because I was light, brite, and dayum near white. When they were truthful and said "yes", they had to go. I have gotten over my complex somewhat, however I find there are difficulties being lightskinned. For instance, (these are the superficial ones) I cannot find the right foundation for me. This may seem trivial, but the white make-up is too pink and the black is too red. I can't wear all of the fly ass MAC pigments and colors like my Chocolate and Mocca friends do. I'm stuck with played out pink and mauve. Seriously, I have to deal with getting jobs and leadership positions and going out of my way to prove that I got them with my own merit and not because I was light enough to "pass". It's funny how the grass is always greener on the other side. *sigh*