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Originally Posted by xo_kathy
I don't think it's "incredibly stupid" to pay for some and not others. I did this. Each bride needs to make their own decision about things. I knew the financial situation of my various attendants. One had the means to pay it all when I asked, then some things came up. Instead of making her step down b/c she couldn't afford everything, I helped her out with her dress and offered her the spare bed at my apartment (parents were in our room, we were at a hotel). I could have offered it to any of my attendants, but I knew she couldn't afford the hotel so she got the offer.
Now, if she is paying for everyone except PhiMuLady, that's one thing, but if she's helping out an attendant or two, that's really no one's business but the bride.
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My college roomate was in this position. There were 5 bridesmaids and we all worked full time and could afford to be in the wedding. Two months before the wedding the maid of honor told the bride she had to drop out along with her daughter (1 of the 2 flower girls) because of money issues, the bride helped her out by making arraignments for her to stay with friends in town and also to pay for her shoes and help with the cost of the dresses. All of us understood because the bride was upfront about helping out a friend.
When my brother got married my dad and mom paid for all the groomsmen's/ best mans tuxes because they were just out of college and my parent had known them for years and wanted to help them out. But they did not know the bridesmaids so they didn't make them this offer.
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