Quote:
Originally posted by valkyrie
The other day, I was out at the bars and the police busted me for violating curfew because they thought I was 14. I had to spend the night in juve lockup and they all laughed at me when I showed them my license because, well, it's understandable that they wouldn't believe that horrible picture really is me and then accused me of carrying my mother's license and trying to pass it off as my own. So then my mom came and posted bond but they thought she was my grandmother and she was so flattered by that she went out for a drink with the officer, but then they carded her at the bar and busted her for underage drinking so now she's in juve with me and I don't know what we're going to do because I don't have access to makeup or a professional-looking pencil skirt or anything, but I might be able to use the shank I fashioned out of a comb to create a nice updo, so maybe that will help.
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Holy CRAP that reminds me of the time I was stopped by a police officer who reminded me that I'm not allowed to ride a bike attached via rope to a moving car - I told him "SHUT UP MUTHAFUCKA I'M OLD ENUFF 2 RIDE!" and my cousin (who invented electric light and the Electric Light Orchestra but not the concept of the Orchestra) blasted the Ruff Ryders Anthem out the car. It turns out there's no legal age for that - it's just plain illegal - so he beat my young-looking ass with the nightstick. Later, when I was the Prince of Wales, I would have a similar encounter over a man who claimed to have intercourse with me - the police arrested him for statutory but I told him I'm a rape counselor and of legal age (which is 9 in Malaysia but I was really 35) and they let him go with nothing but a slap on the rear and Protease inhibitors (for safety's sake).
Years later, I'm still being carded, and I'm completely indifferent to the process!
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