"Marriage is for White People" (Today on Michael Baisden)

[tld221]

Originally posted by Jill1228
As a sistah, this really stuns me. So many of OUR kids are growing up in broken and unstable homes. I read a statistic somewhere that 68% of children born to Black women are out of wedlock.

and a follow up statistic, i believe i heard that a black child is more likely to be raised in a 2 family home during slavery than present-day.

What can we do to kill this trend and kill this whack attitude that kids have? If we don't, the cycle will never be broken...

**SMH** (Scratching my head)

well i would say start by leading by example. if the child sees positive images of black people they can RELATE to getting married, then maybe that midset will change. i'm still amazed when i meet people whose parents are still married (and more surprised when theyre black--and i mean American vs. Carribean).

EVERY black marriage i've known in life has ended in divorce:

• my grandparents on both sides: on both side, my grandfathers were lying cheating whores, alcoholics, abusers of all sorts... which caused my mother's mother to remarry (a Puerto Rican) and my father's mother to stay alone. same for my great-grandmother, who had 9 children by her husband before splitting up and remarrying the man I knew as "grandpa."
• my friends' parents: thinking of my closest black friends, they are all raised by a single parent (most likele single mom, but i have just as many friends who are raised by a single father, typically cause the mother died or is unstable. i THINK i have ONE black friend with parents still married - and notice i say "still" - even in my wording, my assumption is that marriage is not permanent.
• black TV couples: aside from the huxtables, winslows and banks, what black tv show depict a black couple married? and even then, was that model RELATABLE?
• and let's count the number of young black women in my life that show no desire or need to get married.

even my model marriage (my doctor aunt and entrepreneurial/ex-NAVY uncle) is on the rocks (issues of wanting children, i think ive brought it up here before. my other aunt, who married 3 different times (all outside the race mind you) ended in divorce.

long story short, i dont know... but i, too, am of the persuasion of no marriage (if you couldnt tell).