Are single women - Page 6

carnation · #76 03-25-2006, 03:30 PM

Well, there's that, but I gave birth 5 times after I was 35. Three of those were after 40. Most of the women I know who had late-in-life babies had had babies earlier too...there's something about conceiving for the first time after 30 or so that seems to be harder.

kdonline · #77 03-25-2006, 03:32 PM

35 is the magic number to labeled "advanced maternal age." (AMA)

After age 38, your chance of having a successful birth drop about 40%.

(I am currently in the process of IVF.)

Of course, this is a bit off-topic. If you want to talk fertility issues, send me a PM or start a new topic.

Munchkin03 · #78 03-25-2006, 03:36 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by PiKA2001
A lot of people in the military get married very young, which is a main factor of why the divorce rate is so high in the armed forces. So why do these servicemen get married so young? MONEY!

Yep. If you're 18, not really that into going to college, and don't have a skilled trade, the money you'd make as an A1C is damned good compared to McDonalds. Especially if you're in L-U-R-V with your HS sweetheart...

A ton of young guys join the military so they can get married, and provide a decent salary without going to college, right away. This happened to my cousin, who graduated at 17, joined the military, and married his girlfriend a year later, right after she finished high school. Luckily, he hasn't had to go to Iraq or really be in harm's way, as they have two kids and she just turned 21.

texas*princess · #79 03-25-2006, 05:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Munchkin03
A ton of young guys join the military so they can get married, and provide a decent salary without going to college, right away. This happened to my cousin, who graduated at 17, joined the military, and married his girlfriend a year later, right after she finished high school. Luckily, he hasn't had to go to Iraq or really be in harm's way, as they have two kids and she just turned 21.

Wow.. that's nuts.

I know the whole saying 'different strokes for different folks, but geez! To be married right out of HS AND have 2 kids by the age of 21... wow. I'm sure they are having fun raising a family and all, but it's like they skipped all the fun part of life to get right to adulthood.

SmartBlondeGPhB · #80 03-25-2006, 09:47 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by PiKA2001
I shake my head at that. I was getting a new ID card about a year ago and some guy came in with his new wife, just married the day before ( This was a Wednesday or Thursday ) and he was setting her up for insurance. They warn the young people about this all of the time, getting married young for the wrong reasons. I've never been stationed overseas but I hear it's really bad with the local women hunting for US military husbands.

And I guess when her mom expressed surprise her response was "well not married married"........

But legally married......

XOMichelle · #81 03-26-2006, 03:24 AM

y'all going to hate me but I think there are ages that are "right" times for people to get married-- defined by the culture they grow up in and the people they hang around with (since your company does define who you are to an extent).

Ej: we think it's wrong to get married at 15, but that was commonplace 300 years ago (or what have you).

So, in a world where I am not considered an "adult" until I'm 30 (according to my financial aid office), it's kind of odd to think of me acutally having an adult life. Actually, getting married at 20 in my little subculture enclave would be crazy. However, if I had gotten a job right out of school at 18 and had started to support myself right away, that might be a different story.

So, I think you need to have done some growing up before you go hitching yourself to another person for the rest of your life. And most 20 year olds I know are a lot less mature than the 30 year olds I know (myself included). Sorry kids.

Munchkin03 · #82 03-26-2006, 04:55 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by texas*princess
Wow.. that's nuts.

I know the whole saying 'different strokes for different folks, but geez! To be married right out of HS AND have 2 kids by the age of 21... wow. I'm sure they are having fun raising a family and all, but it's like they skipped all the fun part of life to get right to adulthood.

Yeah, they did miss out on a lot. Their getting married young didn't bother me so much; the fact that they had babies when they're still basically kids themselves was the sad part. On my 21st birthday, I was having 21 shots at different bars in Rome with all of the friends I made my semester abroad. On her 21st birthday, she was taking care of two babies.

This really isn't typical of our hometown or family--in fact, he's the only one in our generation of first cousins not to go to college right after school. My grandparents married when they were 19, but they did a lot of travel and waited 10 years before starting a family.

Rudey · #83 03-26-2006, 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by XOMichelle
y'all going to hate me but I think there are ages that are "right" times for people to get married-- defined by the culture they grow up in and the people they hang around with (since your company does define who you are to an extent).

Ej: we think it's wrong to get married at 15, but that was commonplace 300 years ago (or what have you).

So, in a world where I am not considered an "adult" until I'm 30 (according to my financial aid office), it's kind of odd to think of me acutally having an adult life. Actually, getting married at 20 in my little subculture enclave would be crazy. However, if I had gotten a job right out of school at 18 and had started to support myself right away, that might be a different story.

So, I think you need to have done some growing up before you go hitching yourself to another person for the rest of your life. And most 20 year olds I know are a lot less mature than the 30 year olds I know (myself included). Sorry kids.

Let me get this straight, you say you lack maturity because of your age but are giving advice? Seems strange.

And I'd love to know how your financial aid office said you couldn't be an adult until you were 30.

-Rudey

starang21 · #84 03-26-2006, 06:12 PM

maturity is a relative concept.

AGDee · #85 03-26-2006, 09:06 PM

I used to work with a guy who got married young and had 4 kids by the time he was 23 (all a year apart). He's 41 and his youngest is starting college. He has lots of time to travel, have fun, etc. now because he is still young. His philosophy on it was this "I wouldn't have the energy to have 4 young kids at this age, so it's good we did it when we were younger".

Pros and cons to everything... I think it was more common to get married young when there were a lot of good jobs that didn't require a college education. It's an ever changing world though and isn't as practical now. But, if you were working for an auto company in Detroit at 18 and making enough money to support yourself and a family, then you may as well start that family then! Since the auto companies are usually "30 and out", that means you can retire from that job at 48, when most are healthy and have enough energy to travel, etc. My uncle who started having kids later in life has had to keep working years after being eligible for retirement from GM because he still has a kid in high school.

AKA_Monet · #86 03-27-2006, 03:44 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by carnation
Well, there's that, but I gave birth 5 times after I was 35. Three of those were after 40. Most of the women I know who had late-in-life babies had had babies earlier too...there's something about conceiving for the first time after 30 or so that seems to be harder.

So, since I am probably gonna be having a first-time pregnancy after 35 (if ever

), then I have been doing some of my own investigation in the subject.

Most women after age ~35 who have NEVER been pregnant often get "anovulation"--they stop properly ovulating and then don't ovulate at all--oh, they do get menses--hella menses, but they do not release eggs. I don't think they really know why that happens...

For some reason, women that had those eggs cranking and fertilized a peak ages seem to be "saved" from that issue--not 100%--but plenty enough of them... I don't know why that is, either...

Oh, they'll solve prostate cancer before they figure out fertility issues on women...

The other thing is some women, myself included, start to have other health issues putting them in a high-risk pregnancy situation. If I already have benign high blood pressure, and I get pregnant, the pre-clampsia could straight out kill me, period. And most women, if not all, get increased blood pressure during pregnancy, if not gestational diabetes... Think what'll it be like for an older woman having health problems...

And for some reason, like you and your friends having babies later in life, your body remembers what it was like and has the energy to withstand the pregnancy. Whereas, if it was your first go round at 40-something, think of the Rh-factor and antibodies that would do wonders to that poor placenta, much less the embryo...

That's why the medical establishment needs to come clean about women's fertility issues and provide some level of alternatives, including those that aren't extremely bankrupting...