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Originally posted by sugar and spice
In the case of situation #2, though, they have to go through some sort of "growing up" between the first relationship and the second. Habitual cheating involves the person "cheating because they can" (it's a trait that they have, etc.). In the second case, of situational cheating, the trait that the person has is not having balls. If you don't give them time to grow those balls, their cheating will be just as habitual as your example #1 -- because every relationship goes through its low points, the person's way of dealing with the bad times is still important. It's not as easy as "She's a bitch and you're not, so I won't cheat on you."
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I can see what you're saying, but the s.o. does play a significant part. I mean, if you keep dating needy, whiny bitches then I can see where you're going to become a habitual cheater. But if you start dating someone with a different personality, you may not have those same type of low points because it's a different relationship. It may or may not be that you grew a pair, it's just that with a different person, things may be handled differently. Which leads to your second point:
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That's why people who say "If s/he will cheat with you, they'll cheat on you" are generally right. If you go straight from relationship #1 to relationship #2 with no time to reflect on what you did and make a change, your behavior will likely be the same in both relationships. What stops people from cheating in the later relationship is growing up and growing some balls, and that doesn't happen overnight.
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But not everyone goes straight from one relationship to the next. Granted, I'm probably not the best person to be doling out relationship advice because out of the 4 boyfriends I dated, only one of them made it past three months and he's now my husband. I had a lot of fun and made out with a lot of boys during college (and I'm sure there was a time or two I was the other woman), but I didn't pursue a relationship unless I felt it was worth it, and usually it wasn't. (Saved a lot of stupid boy drama that way--I had enough from my roommate). Likewise, the husband had about a year or so to get over his ex, have fun, realize how shitty the relationship actually was and learn how to not do that with his subsequent gf, me. It helped that I'm the complete opposite of his ex. It doesn't mean we didn't/don't have issues from time to time, but we deal with them differently.
That's just me going from my own personal experience, which is probably not the norm, so...
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