Quote:
Originally posted by ISUKappa
As far as cheating goes, I don't believe in the "once a cheater, always a cheater" either. I think the Robmeister has it right -- there's habutial cheating (I cheat because I can--it doesn't matter who I'm with) and situational cheating (I cheat because this relationship sucks but I don't have the balls to end it myself, so I'll take the passive aggressive way out).
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In the case of situation #2, though, they have to go through some sort of "growing up" between the first relationship and the second. Habitual cheating involves the person "cheating because they can" (it's a trait that they have, etc.). In the second case, of situational cheating, the trait that the person has is not having balls. If you don't give them time to grow those balls, their cheating will be just as habitual as your example #1 -- because every relationship goes through its low points, the person's way of dealing with the bad times is still important. It's not as easy as "She's a bitch and you're not, so I won't cheat on you."
That's why people who say "If s/he will cheat with you, they'll cheat on you" are generally right. If you go straight from relationship #1 to relationship #2 with no time to reflect on what you did and make a change, your behavior will likely be the same in both relationships. What stops people from cheating in the later relationship is growing up and growing some balls, and that doesn't happen overnight.
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