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I've been lurking here for a while, as a mother of a future PNM in an effort for her to have a more positive rush experience than I did MANY years ago, and I feel compelled to add my answer to this thread.
When I went through rush, I dropped out before pref night because I had been dropped by my two "dream houses" although I did get an invite from XYZ. I was too crushed to go on. Anyway, after bids were announced, I noticed that many of the new members at XYZ house that I knew either from my dorm or high school were girls that I would have really enjoyed having as sisters, and I realized right then that I had made a bad mistake dropping out. I guess the actives at XYZ knew me better than I knew myself!!! Anyway, had I been given a chance to COB at XYZ, I would have done so in a heartbeat even though I was only lukewarm about them in formal rush.
Hollyberry
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