The Ex Effect

[James]

These comments by Valkyrie are excellent.

Don't talk to him about it, its your hang up so why make him self conscious?

Originally posted by valkyrie
That's not a weird issue at all -- it's like if you put your hand on the stove and get burned, you're going to be afraid to put your hand on a stove again, even if it's a different stove. That's just being smart and trying to protect yourself from being hurt in the same way twice.

That said, I look at it like this -- and please note that I am IN NO WAY saying this would ever happen -- but let's say the new guy DOES eventually cheat on you, or something does eventually go wrong. Will it make it any better that you were really worried about it happening? I don't think it will. I think the best course of action is for you to put aside your worries as best you can and truly enjoy the time you're spending with him. Realize that your fears are based on something someone else did and try to deal with them on your own. I don't think you should tell him but I also don't think you're unreasonable or crazy. What you're going through is an entirely NORMAL reaction and there is absolutely nothing wrong with it -- but that doesn't mean that you can't work to get past it.