Mentoring
Anyone else out there mentoring a teen girl right now--especially a teen mother? I just started mentoring one and wanted to see if any of you could give me some insight, tips, help, anything!! I met my mentee through an outreach that the Women's Group at my Church did. LaTeshia is 15 years old, has a 2 year old son (yep, 13 when she had her baby, sexually active at about 10 when she was raped by a man that her mother practically gave her to. The baby was conceived by consentual sex--as much as a 12 year old can consent!) and is currently living with a cousin. She was on the honor roll the last semester of last year, but because of various reasons she did not go to school for most of the first 2 months of this year. In the short period of time since then she has attended 2 different schools. Her mother is a crack addict, going blind and is dying of AIDS. As I said, she was on the 'honor roll' last year, but she could not put 3 sentences together that all followed the rules of standard grammar if her life depended on it. So much for our wonderful public school system!! I have set up several meetings to do things with her and on all but one occassion she was either not at home when I called to say I was on my way, asleep or had forgotten about our plans, so could not go. I've tried not to get frustrated with her because I know she is not used to stability in her life, but shoot! I have stuff I could be doing too! I am also trying to balance being a "girlfriend" to her and someone who is always preaching to her. I also don't want to be seen as the 'rich lady' (which I am far from--I coulda been buyin' me some stuff!) who buys her and her baby things. She was supposed to go to church with me but complained that she did not have anything to wear. I went out and purchased 3 dresses (they weren't expensive; I went to Marshall's and one was $9.00) and a pair of shoes. That was about a month ago. She still has not gone to church with me. I want to be a positive influence in her life, but I sometimes wonder if our worlds are so different that I could not really imagine the kinds of things she is dealing with. When we first began to communicate she could not believe that I am 34 years old, married, with no children and that my husband has no children either. Her mother is just a few years older than me!! Sometimes I think I have bitten off more than I can chew.
Questions: What kinds of things do you do with your mentee? What do you do when she fails to keep up her end of the bargain? Any veterans with words of wisdom for me? HELP!!
[This message has been edited by Eclipse (edited December 05, 2000).]
[This message has been edited by Eclipse (edited December 06, 2000).]
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