The thought of hitting my parents never crossed my mind. Ever. I see kids doing it all the time now and I'm just

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The basic difference between spanking and child abuse is the parents' state of mind and motivation for hitting their child. If the parent is doing it out of anger or intimidation, technically that's child abuse, even if it's not particularly painful for the child. I've seen many parents out of anger, frustration and immaturity haul off and slap their kids. What does that teach the kids? If they've been slapped enough, absolutely nothing.