Is cheating at the bachelor party ok?

[AGDee]

From what I know of bachelor parties, I agree with Ksigkid.. it's usually the other guys at the party who get out of control.

My ex-husband didn't really want a stripper for his bachelor party. He's pretty much against them in general. He wanted a golf outing and a night of playing poker. His married buddies all wanted a stripper though. They were having the stripper part at his Best Man's house. His Best Man was married with kids who were 2 and 4 at the time. The plan was for his wife to leave the house with the girls from 7pm-9pm so they could do their thing. She was to return at 9 pm, when the babysitter was going to be there, drop off the girls (kids) and then meet us women folk at the bar for my bachelorette party.

She arrived at the bar around 10:30 pm, hysterical. Seems when she got there, the stripper was still there and her husband was in his boxers dancing with her in the living room. So, there she was with two little girls who needed to go to bed, a babysitter who had just arrived and her husband in that compromising position. Their marriage almost didn't survive it. She did say to me "You're marrying the right guy, he was the only one there who still had all his clothes on". You can guess how much fun my bachelorette party ended up being, with all the wives of these men who had undressed with the stripper! I was surprised their marriage survived it, because it led to a pretty intense fight between those two.

When my (now) ex-husband got home that night, after I made him shower(lol), I noticed that his legs were all bruised and he had little holes in his pants and skin. The stripper was a gymnast stripper who was doing back handsprings and landing on his legs in 5" stiletto heels. He said he was so worried about protecting his "jewels" from those heels that he wasn't even paying attention to her. Knowing him, his morals, and his strong Christian beliefs, I believe him, even now.

[James]

Why would i justify? i am just observing.

But its a more common occurrence than I think a lot of women would be comfortable with, even if its less of an occurence than many would fear.

Originally posted by AXiD670
James, are you trying to justify this whole scenario?

[Peaches-n-Cream]

A guy I knew went to a bachelor party for his brother held at a bar. He thought they would eat bar food, drink beer, shoot some pool, throw darts, and hang out. Then the 'entertainment' arrived. He was mortified and left as soon as the two chicks started putting eggs where eggs don't belong. He said it was pathetic watching these two chicks, who were clearly drug addicted and possibly disease infected, put on a 'show' for the guys. I got the impression that there wasn't enough latex in the world for him to touch either of them.

After a few minutes, the groom threw them out because the entire experience was disgusting.

[WCUgirl]

Originally posted by James
Why would i justify? i am just observing.

The way you worded your response, the tone read like you were trying to justify their actions.

[kddani]

Originally posted by James
Why would i justify? i am just observing.

But its a more common occurrence than I think a lot of women would be comfortable with, even if its less of an occurence than many would fear.

Your observations are limited to a very small pool- a few of your friends. You word your observations as a generalization. James, you are the GC professional shit-stirrer, so don't try to come off all innocent.

I think more and more it's becoming a less common of occurrence. A LOT of guys opting for a different sort of bachelor party- a weekend of gambling, a golf trip, etc. I know a lot of people who have gotten married lately, and only one of the grooms actually went to a strip club. Guys don't keep secrets very well, so it's not like if something happened t would stay secert. Guys like to talk, especially when it comes to naked women and/or embarassing stories about their buddies.

If my fiance did that and I found out before the wedding, I would not marry him. If I found out later, I'm not really sure what I would do....I probably wouldn't leave him, I don't know, that'd be hard.

[KSigkid]

Originally posted by kddani
I think more and more it's becoming a less common of occurrence. A LOT of guys opting for a different sort of bachelor party- a weekend of gambling, a golf trip, etc. I know a lot of people who have gotten married lately, and only one of the grooms actually went to a strip club. Guys don't keep secrets very well, so it's not like if something happened t would stay secert. Guys like to talk, especially when it comes to naked women and/or embarassing stories about their buddies.

This has been a trend I've noticed, and a lot of my older friends/cousins/etc. didn't necessarily understand it. One of my buddies went to Vegas for his bachelor party, and just did gambling and drinking. Almost every other one I've been to has been of the bar-hopping variety.

What is becoming the norm with my friends is just what I described; we buy the groom a really good dinner, then going out drinking, and end up crashing at a hotel.

In James' defense though, there are bachelor parties like that, and there are grooms who cheat on their fiancees at those parties. Luckily my fiancee (now wife) knew well enough I wasn't going to do something like that.

[ISUKappa]

Originally posted by GeekyPenguin
If these guys are really the groom's friends, they wouldn't be setting off his married life on such a bad foot.

If anybody ever did this to me, I'd make him eat my engagement ring, and then my daddy would let him have it. I took back a cheater once and it was the biggest mistake of my life.

Naw, you make him eat a fake ring and then pawn the real one to buy yourself something nice.

The husband had a joint party weekend in NYC with another one of his fraternity brothers that was getting married two weeks after us. They did a lot of what it sounds like C did -- went out to bars, went out to eat, did a little sightseeing (not much) and basically hung with the boys. I know some guys did go to one of the strip clubs, but husband didn't (it was a rather $$$ strip club and I would know [and not be happy] if he had spent that kind of money).

[honeychile]

Originally posted by James
or merely oral sex.

Is that like being a little bit pregnant, or just having syphilis (instead of AIDS)?

[GeekyPenguin]

Originally posted by honeychile
Is that like being a little bit pregnant, or just having syphilis (instead of AIDS)?

It really is more likely only being Bobbitted one inch, instead of the whole thing.

[KSig RC]

Originally posted by honeychile
Is that like being a little bit pregnant, or just having syphilis (instead of AIDS)?

No, it's actually like having oral sex performed on you, rather than having intercourse.

Now, you may not differentiate between the two, but most people would assign a greater severity to one over the other. Some Congressional committees and former presidents would agree.

[Lindz928]

Originally posted by KSig RC
No, it's actually like having oral sex performed on you, rather than having intercourse.

Now, you may not differentiate between the two, but most people would assign a greater severity to one over the other. Some Congressional committees and former presidents would agree.

Yes, sex is probably WORSE than oral sex.... But I would still dump a guy for it. I would probably dump a guy for making out with another girl. Cheating is cheating. PERIOD.

[rhochi2002]

oral sex is definately cheating....
I know alot of guys that don't like strippers. I know guys that do.
What I don't know is alot of guys that would cheat right before getting married.
oh Guys definately talk!! They are worse than girls!!

[KSig RC]

Originally posted by Lindz928
Yes, sex is probably WORSE than oral sex.... But I would still dump a guy for it. I would probably dump a guy for making out with another girl. Cheating is cheating. PERIOD.

You'll note that I didn't say anything at all about cheating (or punctuation) - just pointing out that there are definite degrees, even if it's still cheating (punctuation) or whatever.

[AOIIBrandi]

Originally posted by KSig RC
You'll note that I didn't say anything at all about cheating (or punctuation) - just pointing out that there are definite degrees, even if it's still cheating (punctuation) or whatever.

To me there are no degrees, it all holds the same weight with the same consequences. Which probably makes all the guys happy they're not my husband