Maximizing your options

[AXOrushadvisor]

I just went through something similar to all of this with my DD. She didn't make the advanced dance team. She was bummed that she was invited to stay on the intermediate team. We had tears and she needed to "grieve" about it. When she was ready to talk I just calmly told her that dancing really wasn't her passion and reminded her of the things that bugged her about dancing. In the end she is ok with it. She was more embarrassed about not being invited.

Again, I don't think that Rho Chi's are very well trained. My niece is going to be one this fall at a competitive PAC 10 school and even she has admitted they really haven't been trained. Here is the other thing that I have learned through the years. Most women who LOVE recruitment and GET it don't become Rho Chi's. A lot of the women become Rho Chi's not because they LOVE recruitment and can help these women through the process, but because they want to get out of their work weeks and their chapter recruitment.

One last thing for what it is worth. I think women who drop out of recruitment before they attend preference parties are foolish. Why not just go? There has been more then one girl who has had their mind changed in a preference party. When I think about maximizing your options this is what I think of. Not quitting and staying until the end. If at the end of a recruitment that you have fully participated in you still are left cold then don't sign a bid card. At least you'll know you gave it every chance, right?

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by AXOrushadvisor

I just went through something similar to all of this with my DD. She didn't make the advanced dance team. She was bummed that she was invited to stay on the intermediate team. We had tears and she needed to "grieve" about it. When she was ready to talk I just calmly told her that dancing really wasn't her passion and reminded her of the things that bugged her about dancing. In the end she is ok with it. She was more embarrassed about not being invited.

Again, I don't think that Rho Chi's are very well trained. My niece is going to be one this fall at a competitive PAC 10 school and even she has admitted they really haven't been trained. Here is the other thing that I have learned through the years. Most women who LOVE recruitment and GET it don't become Rho Chi's. A lot of the women become Rho Chi's not because they LOVE recruitment and can help these women through the process, but because they want to get out of their work weeks and their chapter recruitment.

One last thing for what it is worth. I think women who drop out of recruitment before they attend preference parties are foolish. Why not just go? There has been more then one girl who has had their mind changed in a preference party. When I think about maximizing your options this is what I think of. Not quitting and staying until the end. If at the end of a recruitment that you have fully participated in you still are left cold then don't sign a bid card. At least you'll know you gave it every chance, right?

I was a Recruitment Counselor twice because I was a better rusher for Greek life than I was for my sorority, and because I'm one of those people that agrees that Recruitment Counselors are often not well trained...so I wanted to help change that (or at least guarantee someone on the team knew the rules backwards and forwards). Recruitment Counselors should be extremely well versed in both rules and possible situations that arise with PNM's...that would cut out so much confusion during recruitment on pretty much every campus.

I always had girls drop out of recruitment because their favorite two sororities dropped them and they were too snobby to visit the other three. It makes me so mad...not only is it unbelievably rude it's very short sighted.

[Katmandu]

I absolutely agree that in these ginormous sororities of 200+ and sometimes 250+ women, and pledge classes of 90+ almost any PNM will find a mix of sympatico sisters, frenemies, mentors, casual acquaintances, people they don't like, people they love, people they disapprove of, people they look up to, and people, frankly, they never get to know. To think there is only ONE place they "fit" is ludicrous.

(In a small campus where chapters are 20-30 members, totally different animal.)

Anyone else dying for that first, "live" recruitment story? Is Oklahoma State the first again? Go Pokes!

[AZ-AlphaXi]

Originally Posted by Katmandu

I
Anyone else dying for that first, "live" recruitment story? Is Oklahoma State the first again? Go Pokes!

Nope .. per IrishPipes lovely recruitment thread, Auburn, Al is first out the gate with an 8/8 start. Oklahoma State is listed as an 8/9 start.

[AUAZD2001]

Originally Posted by Katmandu

I absolutely agree that in these ginormous sororities of 200+ and sometimes 250+ women, and pledge classes of 90+ almost any PNM will find a mix of sympatico sisters, frenemies, mentors, casual acquaintances, people they don't like, people they love, people they disapprove of, people they look up to, and people, frankly, they never get to know. To think there is only ONE place they "fit" is ludicrous.

(In a small campus where chapters are 20-30 members, totally different animal.)

I have to agree. I didn't meet my BFFs during recruitment. In fact, I didn't even meet them until right before initiation. And I didn't really get to know them until spring semester. But I ddn't consider them my best friends until sophomore year. Bottom line, your collegiate sorority experience extends so much beyond recruitment week. PNMs should have faith that if they stick it out, they can have a great experience.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by AUAZD2001

I have to agree. I didn't meet my BFFs during recruitment. In fact, I didn't even meet them until right before initiation. And I didn't really get to know them until spring semester. But I ddn't consider them my best friends until sophomore year. Bottom line, your collegiate sorority experience extends so much beyond recruitment week. PNMs should have faith that if they stick it out, they can have a great experience.

Off-topic, but I think that whole first year is a really critical time in sorority life.

Sometimes, PNMs are iffy but become less so during the NM period. But there are women who go through that whole time and are STILL iffy when they Initiate.

Once summer comes, if a member still feels iffy, she probably won't be there come fall.

That's why it's important for chapters to make sure that they're continuing to engage members during that period after initiation. When that happens, that member becomes more open to sticking it out a little while longer. Eventually, she looks forward to fall and doing recruitment with her new sisters, living in the house next year, and plans for the next year.

Once again, I swear this made sense in my head. lol.

[SWTXBelle]

Just got a phone call about a pnm going through at LSU. I mentioned maximizing your options, but Pretty Pretty Princess Snowflake didn't register with our Alumnae Panhellenic because she knows which groups she is interested in, and who she is sure will just love her because,ya know, she's so special - oh, I'm sure this will end well . . .

[AnchorAlumna]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Just got a phone call about a pnm going through at LSU. I mentioned maximizing your options, but Pretty Pretty Princess Snowflake didn't register with our Alumnae Panhellenic because she knows which groups she is interested in, and who she is sure will just love her because,ya know, she's so special - oh, I'm sure this will end well . . .

Well, ya know.......it might.
That's what's so frustrating!

[33girl]

Originally Posted by AnchorAlumna

Well, ya know.......it might.
That's what's so frustrating!

Yep. The people who need to get spanked the most are sometimes the ones who get spanked the least.

[exlurker]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Just got a phone call about a pnm going through at LSU. I mentioned maximizing your options, but Pretty Pretty Princess Snowflake didn't register with our Alumnae Panhellenic because she knows which groups she is interested in, and who she is sure will just love her because,ya know, she's so special - oh, I'm sure this will end well . . .

It's awfully late for a PNM to be hunting for recs for LSU, so why the phone-calling ? (I know you probably can't say..).

< sarcasm coating the following like oil on a pelican > I suppose the chapters that her royal highness is willing to grace with her presence are aware she's on her way, right? < /sarcasm>

[aephi alum]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Just got a phone call about a pnm going through at LSU. I mentioned maximizing your options, but Pretty Pretty Princess Snowflake didn't register with our Alumnae Panhellenic because she knows which groups she is interested in, and who she is sure will just love her because,ya know, she's so special - oh, I'm sure this will end well . . .

I think we know how her recruitment is going to go. <pops some popcorn>

[Katmandu]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Just got a phone call about a pnm going through at LSU. I mentioned maximizing your options, but Pretty Pretty Princess Snowflake didn't register with our Alumnae Panhellenic because she knows which groups she is interested in, and who she is sure will just love her because,ya know, she's so special - oh, I'm sure this will end well . . .

Oh, I'm pulling out the popcorn and the barcalounger for this one.......
Sure to end well.

[carnation]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Just got a phone call about a pnm going through at LSU. I mentioned maximizing your options, but Pretty Pretty Princess Snowflake didn't register with our Alumnae Panhellenic because she knows which groups she is interested in, and who she is sure will just love her because,ya know, she's so special - oh, I'm sure this will end well . . .

She should read justamom's thread about her daughter's LSU rush and the one about the next year too. Lots off surprised PNMs...

[SWTXBelle]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Just got a phone call about a pnm going through at LSU. I mentioned maximizing your options, but Pretty Pretty Princess Snowflake didn't register with our Alumnae Panhellenic because she knows which groups she is interested in, and who she is sure will just love her because,ya know, she's so special - oh, I'm sure this will end well . . .

Pretty Pretty Princess Snowflake did not get a bid - BUT IT'S OKAY BECAUSE HER AUNT GOT A BID AS A JUNIOR AND SO IT WILL BE SO MUCH BETTER NEXT YEAR.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Pretty Pretty Princess Snowflake did not get a bid - BUT IT'S OKAY BECAUSE HER AUNT GOT A BID AS A JUNIOR AND SO IT WILL BE SO MUCH BETTER NEXT YEAR.

Oh...of course! That's a recipe for success!