Older Perp - Page 2

Gusteau · #1 04-02-2012, 01:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by knight_shadow

*snicker*

I'm so glad I had something positive to contribute to this thread...

Titchou · #2 12-22-2009, 09:10 PM

I think I'd try the reverse with her - Auntie D, I could swear that you told me a long time ago that you weren't Greek in college but Susie says you are a DEF! And then see what she says...

DrPhil · #3 12-22-2009, 09:16 PM

I vote for a mixture of "listen ho, stop playin" and conversing with her about the seriousness of what she's doing.

I vote for the former because I think lying about memberships, accomplishments, and credentials makes a person lame as hell. I vote for the latter because she needs to know that she's not only making herself look like a loser, she's potentially impacting other young ladies' outcomes.

AOII Angel · #4 12-22-2009, 09:12 PM

Is DEF a sorority that any of your daughters has joined? If so, maybe have her ask D if she went through AI since she had heard that she was a member of her sorority. If she says no, she can then ask why people are mistakenly thinking D is a member of DEF. If not, you could ask her the same way. Maybe she did AI DEF, and she just didn't tell you ( unless, of course, it's not a group that does that sort of thing, but she may not know that

)

Benzgirl · #5 12-22-2009, 09:19 PM

or, ask your network (a member of DEF) to look up her name in their directory. I know that isn't 100% gospel, but ma;ybe it might answer a question.

honeychile · #6 12-22-2009, 10:18 PM

Wow, talking about a rock and a hard place! I like Titchou and BlueSkies' advice, but with a nasty twist: Gift wrap a small mascot or symbol of DEF and hand it to her for Christmas, with a "I thought you'd like this!"

Just interested · #7 12-22-2009, 10:50 PM

I like Titchou's advice, too. However, I would also follow Benzgirl's advice and do a little investigating on my own. I wouldn't be able to resist. I'm sure someone from that sorority would be glad to make a call to HQ and check it out for you.

libramunoz · #8 12-22-2009, 10:53 PM

I'd seriously talk with her about the seriousness of her actions and tell her, "hey, fool, sooner or later, you'll expose yourself and when the members of DEF come knocking at your door to give you a beat down, don't come calling me."
Or I'd seriously tell her, if you don't stop this, I will call the nat'l headquarters and let them know of your behavior and claim to their sorority.

I know that I'm lane hopping and swerving, but if someone called the nat'l headquarters for a NPC sorority, and let them know that someone was perping as a member, would the sorority not send them a cease and decist(?) letter or face further consequences?

Titchou · #9 12-22-2009, 11:03 PM

OK, perhaps there is a logical explanation for this and I'd like to give her the benefit of the doubt. What if she did join but resigned for some reason? So, she says she wasn't Greek so that she doesn't have to explain it - I know people like that. But maybe this neighbor knows someone that was in school with the woman and doesn't know she resigned. Could be...so I wouldn't jump on her case without details but I would mention the discrepancy and see what she says.

carnation · #10 12-22-2009, 11:10 PM

Well, for sure she wasn't Greek, even AI, but I think I'll pm someone from that group to check their website so we can say that we reallyreally know for sure. This is so stupid! Her mom and her kids know she wasn't Greek and if someone mentions it to them, they're bound to blurt out the truth too. I figure since I've heard it several times, they probably will as well.

Seems like if someone decided to perp, they'd do it far from home and not in the town they grew up in.

33girl · #11 12-23-2009, 12:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Titchou

OK, perhaps there is a logical explanation for this and I'd like to give her the benefit of the doubt. What if she did join but resigned for some reason? So, she says she wasn't Greek so that she doesn't have to explain it - I know people like that. But maybe this neighbor knows someone that was in school with the woman and doesn't know she resigned. Could be...so I wouldn't jump on her case without details but I would mention the discrepancy and see what she says.

That's what I was thinking too. If she self terminated or was terminated she might not have wanted to bring it up.

carnation · #12 12-30-2009, 12:54 PM

A member checked and D is definitely not a DEF. I doubt she ever was; she's too status-conscious to terminate and she wouldn't have done anything to get kicked out--you'd have to know her.

Here's something ironic that popped up this week. She has a chance to be AIed into another group that she has ties to. Haha! I'm sure she's dying to but then she'd have to figure a way to gloss over her earlier story to the women around here. ("Did I say I was a DEF? Oh, what was I thinking, I'm an ABC!")

33girl · #13 12-30-2009, 12:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnation

A member checked and D is definitely not a DEF. I doubt she ever was; she's too status-conscious to terminate and she wouldn't have done anything to get kicked out--you'd have to know her.

Here's something ironic that popped up this week. She has a chance to be AIed into another group that she has ties to. Haha! I'm sure she's dying to but then she'd have to figure a way to gloss over her earlier story to the women around here. ("Did I say I was a DEF? Oh, what was I thinking, I'm an ABC!")

This is the definition of POETIC JUSTICE.

CutiePie2000 · #14 12-30-2009, 04:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnation

A member checked and D is definitely not a DEF. I doubt she ever was; she's too status-conscious to terminate and she wouldn't have done anything to get kicked out--you'd have to know her.

Here's something ironic that popped up this week. She has a chance to be AIed into another group that she has ties to. Haha! I'm sure she's dying to but then she'd have to figure a way to gloss over her earlier story to the women around here. ("Did I say I was a DEF? Oh, what was I thinking, I'm an ABC!")

carnation, is it possible that she pledged DEF, but did not actually initiate? Maybe that's why she partly thinks of herself as a DEF.

I don't know the situation nor all of the details, but looking at the posts that everyone has made so far & the information provided, there's been a lot of assumptions being made about how things appear. I also wonder if these other women who claim that D said that she was a DEF got the details confused? It's entirely possible - sometimes the recall of others is not 100% accurate.

If you want this woman to come clean, she will likely need to feel safe before she will speak her truth.

Just my $0.02.

PS You could also play dumb and ask her, "Do you think that you will AI into ABC? To do so, you cannot have initiated into any other NPC group. Did you initiate into any other NPC group during college?" and then see what she says. If she says no, ask her if she ever had any ties to DEF? And then see what she says. My point is, if you ask her anything where she might get defensive, you might not get the straight up answer.

good luck and let us know what happens, as I'm curious now - LOL.

APhiAnna · #15 12-30-2009, 05:18 PM

Maybe she terminated her membership? I know two people (a friend's mother and a former sister of mine) who still say they are XYZs although they resigned their membership during college. They do not seem to understand that technically they are not in their sororities anymore. They seem to equate initiation with full membership.

But it sounds like you know her well enough to know she is making it up. I would definitely go the passive aggressive route...I like the suggestion of telling her that she has been hearing the funniest thing...that people have been saying she is an XYZ. That will probably send the message strongly but without being rude.