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  #11  
Old 10-08-2025, 06:29 PM
cheerfulgreek cheerfulgreek is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Minnesota
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sciencewoman View Post
So apparently Dan Campbell can regenerate his hair after your initial "masterpiece"/shave/disaster, just like he's regenerated the Lions? OK, I'm willing to believe he has that power.
Ok.. So….. I can explain.

See, that’s the advantage of having a chemistry background, Sciencewoman. When I realized I’d basically… like… totally butchered his scalp? I put my lab coat on, whipped up a topical follicle accelerator using caffeine, dog shampoo, Axe Body Spray, Gatorade Zero, and, (don’t judge me) half a Flintstone vitamin.

I shook it up in a jar, heated it up, prayed over it, and slapped it on. His hair grew back in 24 hours. I was like, “Oh. My. GAWD, Daniel! It actually worked!”

Only problem? Okay.. so it came back like.. this weird bleached blonde, Golden Retriever color? I mean, I don’t even know if it’s permanent? But anyway, I blew it out, dyed it black, and then he goes, “Lay it on me. Can you give me that 80s Michael Jackson look? I wanna look fly when we play your Vikings.” That’s when I added the curl chemical after I dyed it.

So I’m like, “Okaaay… I guess I can try.” And voila’. History was made.

$5 bucks, a minor chemical burn, and now he looks like he’s about to drop a funk album. Pure art.

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