advice for appealing probation / termination decision

[amIblue?]

The whole thing sounds fishy to me, but I believe that the early alumna ship has not only sailed, but it was never in port to begin with.

What I don't understand is why the OP would be fighting so hard to remain a part of a group that has so clearly indicated that she is not wanted. Whether it be for legitimate reasons or not, I don't get it. Do you know how powerful it is for a chapter to have to vote to terminate a member? I've been involved with my sorority for over twenty years, and I've seen it exactly once.

[Nanners52674]

Originally Posted by sweetheart272

i was recommended for termination by the chapter's disciplinary committee, there was a chapter wide vote on whether i should be terminated or probation (i don't know what the results of the vote were), this information was sent to nationals, who sent a letter to me saying that i'm on probation until a final decision is made.

I'm not going to beat around the hush on this. Resign and let it go.

You have had NOTHING nice to say about your chapter.

Why do you want to remain a member of an organization that you think is so messed up and dysfunctional.

[als463]

I have a question for the OP. Have you aired your grievances on other websites pertaining to Greek Life regarding not feeling supported by your sorority (such as TSM)?

[sweetheart272]

Originally Posted by als463

I have a question for the OP. Have you aired your grievances on other websites pertaining to Greek Life regarding not feeling supported by your sorority (such as TSM)?

no, i've learned from my probation experience the important of keeping things private and not getting people involved that are not meant to know confidential information.

this is the first time i've joined one of these websites, and i'll admit i was hesitant to do so because of possible negative consequences, even though i've been super careful to avoid disclosing any even slightly identifiable detail.

i may later regret it, but at the moment i am very glad that i sought out help on this board. seeing as that we have no alumna advisor and the next higher up supervisor is too far away to meet in person and difficult to get a hold of, i was at a loss as to who i could go to for advice. I felt that my only chance of finding someone who might be able to guide me on framing my opinions with a better approach.

you all have been very helpful! i can't tell you how valuable it is to me to get feedback from you all, i truly appreciate it.

you've opened my eyes to things i wouldn't have seen or wouldn't considered,being that i'm so emotionally invested in this and that can make it hard to evaluate things properly.

it may sound stupid or weird, but i feel like i actually made a notable amount of progress in self-awareness and appropriate social interaction skills just from the time i started this thread until now.

so thank you guys!

[als463]

Originally Posted by sweetheart272

no, i've learned from my probation experience the important of keeping things private and not getting people involved that are not meant to know confidential information.

this is the first time i've joined one of these websites, and i'll admit i was hesitant to do so because of possible negative consequences, even though i've been super careful to avoid disclosing any even slightly identifiable detail.

i may later regret it, but at the moment i am very glad that i sought out help on this board. seeing as that we have no alumna advisor and the next higher up supervisor is too far away to meet in person and difficult to get a hold of, i was at a loss as to who i could go to for advice. I felt that my only chance of finding someone who might be able to guide me on framing my opinions with a better approach.

you all have been very helpful! i can't tell you how valuable it is to me to get feedback from you all, i truly appreciate it.

you've opened my eyes to things i wouldn't have seen or wouldn't considered,being that i'm so emotionally invested in this and that can make it hard to evaluate things properly.

it may sound stupid or weird, but i feel like i actually made a notable amount of progress in self-awareness and appropriate social interaction skills just from the time i started this thread until now.

so thank you guys!

Why? Were you initially on probation for posting something on social media that upset people in your chapter?

[sweetheart272]

Originally Posted by als463

Why? Were you initially on probation for posting something on social media that upset people in your chapter?

no, but i don't think it's appropriate to discuss the details of things that are confidential.

i say i've learned this lesson mostly because whether it be through social media, the phone, face-to-face contact, or someone eavesdropping, things you say can get out, be misconstrued, and used against you.

i used to be too naive and trusting, but i've learned that the best policy when it comes to secrets and confidential information is to trust no one and just keep it confidential. its not worth the risk

[sweetheart272]

Originally Posted by amIblue?

The whole thing sounds fishy to me, but I believe that the early alumna ship has not only sailed, but it was never in port to begin with.

What I don't understand is why the OP would be fighting so hard to remain a part of a group that has so clearly indicated that she is not wanted. Whether it be for legitimate reasons or not, I don't get it. Do you know how powerful it is for a chapter to have to vote to terminate a member? I've been involved with my sorority for over twenty years, and I've seen it exactly once.

yes, it's unfortunate in many ways, but just because i've had conflicts with certain girls in the house (who unfortunately tended to be the ones in charge), but that doesn't mean i don't have strong bonds and good friendships or at least kind relationships with many of the other members.