Always a PNM, never a sister.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by SoccerSweetie22

Hi everyone!

Since coming to college, I've wanted to join a sorority. I rushed my freshman and sophomore years, but did not receive any bids. There are six sororities on my campus and I am a legacy for one of them. (My sister went to a different school though)

Both times I wondered why I did not receive a bid. Was my hair too frizzy? Was my laugh a little too obnoxious? Did I seem too innocent or shy? How important is my weight? I was very confused to say the least.

Earlier this year, however, I received my answer. My freshman year I lived in a dorm with a young woman who was in a sorority, and before recruitment that year, she wrote a letter to someone higher up in the Greek system saying that I do not uphold the morals and values of sisterhood. She wrote this letter after only knowing me for a few (3) months, but her complaint has negatively affected my chances for receiving a bid. I get along great with all of her sisters and many of them spoke highly of me to their President and about offering me a bid. However, their President spoke to my former roommate and the young woman stood firm. This was very disappointing, especially because I don't have a problem with her. (Side note: Every sorority has good qualities and I am not closed off to any of them, nor do I feel any bias because of my legacy. I want to be a part of a sorority for the sisterhood. I couldn't care less about top/bottom house rankings.)

My question to the Greek community is this:

Should I go through recruitment again? In your opinion, would it be a waste of time or could things be different this time around? I'm asking because all (or most) of you have been a part of the selection process, you know what is and what isn't important. I respect the confidentiality of the selection process and in no way am I asking for insider secrets. I just want to know your thoughts about my chances based on the things you've encountered. I know it won't be 100% accurate because you don't know me, but should I pay the fee and devote another weekend to going Greek? Or should I save myself from another round of rejection and look for other ways to get involved on campus?

I go through recruitment again, here is a list of my pros and cons

Pros
- 3.77 GPA, Honors Program
- Letters of Rec from my legacy sister and Panhellenic President at my school
- I can pay my dues. I'm not a 1%er, but I'm pretty well off (Well, family is)
- I know more people in the Greek System
- I've been told I'm a very funny and likable person, and I would like very much to be involved in the Greek system

Cons
-The letter from my former roommate
-I'm going into my third year
-My weight (I'm lighter than last year, but it could still be a concern)

Question: How do you know that she wrote said letter?

Ask yourself: What is different about me this time around that would make things turn out differently than they did the last 2 times?

Other things: Is your school such that a re-rusher has a decent chance at getting a bid? If it's not, you may be out of luck.

Other things to note:

Your desirability as PNM also goes far beyond your grades, weight, and ability to pay dues. There's more to it than that. Particularly your personality.

Also, having friends in a chapter only works in your favor if these friends actually WANT you as part of their chapter. I had plenty of friends in undergrad whom I LOVED, but didn't think they'd make good Sigmas.