Her Peeps

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

I was reading some of the comments about parents being involved. I disagree, because your parents are your covering until you get married. It's just that they have better insight than you have (if you have parents who care about you). I mean, this might not always be to your liking, but it is always for your own good. This is true no matter what you think of them (provided that you have good parents). Your parents love you, they know you, and they want the best for you. Honestly, when it comes to choosing a mate, it's not brain surgery to figure out why their counsel in this area is invaluable. First of all, they are not in love with your significant other, so they can see him objectively. Second, they know and love you, so they are sensitive to what your needs are -what will work for you, and what will hinder you. So, when your parents speak on the matter of a mate, you need to listen to them instead of being dumb and relying on your own decisions.

You do realize that not all parents have the best intentions in terms of their children's mates, right? Just look at the in-law venting thread. Do you think that the husbands of those GC women were "being dumb and relying on their [own] decisions?"

I've seen plenty of controlling fathers try to derail their daughters' relationships so they could be the only man in their lives. I've seen plenty of manipulative women do the same thing. People disown their children for whom they choose to love--for reasons as simple as race, religion, or socioeconomic factors. To say that they should just listen to whatever Mommy and Daddy tells them is naive, to say the least.

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by Munchkin03

You do realize that not all parents have the best intentions in terms of their children's mates, right? Just look at the in-law venting thread. Do you think that the husbands of those GC women were "being dumb and relying on their [own] decisions?"

I've seen plenty of controlling fathers try to derail their daughters' relationships so they could be the only man in their lives. I've seen plenty of manipulative women do the same thing. People disown their children for whom they choose to love--for reasons as simple as race, religion, or socioeconomic factors. To say that they should just listen to whatever Mommy and Daddy tells them is naive, to say the least.

I said depending on what kind of parents you have. I'm speaking of wise parents. Good parents aren't controlling.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

Good parents aren't controlling.

That's also a really general, and pretty naive, statement.

Parents who have been perfectly fine in raising upstanding citizens can go buckwild once it's evident that their daughter's about to marry some guy, go off to college, or exert their independence in some other way. I've seen it happen so many times. Luckily, they have been good parents in every other aspect of their child's lives, so their kids know how to make the right decisions.

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by Munchkin03

That's also a really general, and pretty naive, statement.

Parents who have been perfectly fine in raising upstanding citizens can go buckwild once it's evident that their daughter's about to marry some guy, go off to college, or exert their independence in some other way. I've seen it happen so many times. Luckily, they have been good parents in every other aspect of their child's lives, so their kids know how to make the right decisions.

Not really. I've seen the opposite too many times. If you prefer to follow your own decisions, then okay. I've always made the decision to heed good advice, and most of it came from my parents, my friends, and my pastor. It seems to work for me. Do what works for you.

I agree with the last part of your post, though.