Unsuccessful fall rush at Alabama, questions about possible spring rush. Advice?

[mikewozowski]

darn - i had a long post typed out and i lost it.

als463 - i think you are being a little harsh. or worse.

if a girl goes thru the whole process and ends up only with a match to one sorority that was never on her list of preferences, then i don't think you should be so judgemantal and calling her a spoiled brat.

the process is supposed to be mutual selection. if you only end up with a choice that you really didn't choose, then it really wasn't mutual, was it?

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by mikewozowski

darn - i had a long post typed out and i lost it.

als463 - i think you are being a little harsh. or worse.

if a girl goes thru the whole process and ends up only with a match to one sorority that was never on her list of preferences, then i don't think you should be so judgemantal and calling her a spoiled brat.

the process is supposed to be mutual selection. if you only end up with a choice that you really didn't choose, then it really wasn't mutual, was it?

I think what she was getting at is that you have to be willing to give the chapter a chance.

As I've said, if a PNM feels very uncomfortable at a house, then fine. If she had a good time at all, she should try it out. That's my opinion, anyway.

[als463]

Originally Posted by mikewozowski

darn - i had a long post typed out and i lost it.

als463 - i think you are being a little harsh. or worse.

if a girl goes thru the whole process and ends up only with a match to one sorority that was never on her list of preferences, then i don't think you should be so judgemantal and calling her a spoiled brat.

the process is supposed to be mutual selection. if you only end up with a choice that you really didn't choose, then it really wasn't mutual, was it?

I'm sorry. I guess I didn't realize you were in a sorority. That's the problem. It is "mutual selection" and some girls don't seem to get it. Bama has a very active Greek life. All of the sororities have SOMETHING to offer. When girls go through recruitment at such a competitive school and then complain that they didn't feel "right in that house" or with "those girls" what the person is really saying is that she does not see herself in a lower-tier house. The opportunity to be Greek is something you should consider a privilege and not a right.

The only way you should feel "uncomfortable" joining a sorority at Bama is not because you don't "feel a connection" but, because they are all a bunch of seal-clubbing, charity-hating freak shows. Bama does not have ANY of that. Once again, I don't feel bad for the OP or any other girl who goes to a very competitive Greek school and turns down the opportunity to be Greek.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by als463

I'm sorry. I guess I didn't realize you were in a sorority. That's the problem. It is "mutual selection" and some girls don't seem to get it. Bama has a very active Greek life. All of the sororities have SOMETHING to offer. When girls go through recruitment at such a competitive school and then complain that they didn't feel "right in that house" or with "those girls" what the person is really saying is that she does not see herself in a lower-tier house. The opportunity to be Greek is something you should consider a privilege and not a right.

The only way you should feel "uncomfortable" joining a sorority at Bama is not because you don't "feel a connection" but, because they are all a bunch of seal-clubbing, charity-hating freak shows. Bama does not have ANY of that. Once again, I don't feel bad for the OP or any other girl who goes to a very competitive Greek school and turns down the opportunity to be Greek.

I disagree that's the only reason to feel uncomfortable. Here's an example from a friend of mine: As a freshman she dropped out of recruitment because she felt her pref choice was too heavy on drinking and partying (they had brought it up three times over the course of the week). Now were there girls in the house that didn't drink? I'm absolutely sure there were. But the ones she happened to meet acted like anyone who didn't get shitty all the time was no good, and she wasn't up for it. (She repeated their comments to me, and I would've gotten the same impression she did.) It's hard for a freshman to have the perspective and guts to pledge a group after that experience and realize she can find a place in the house. She didn't go Greek and had an amazing experience in T-Town.

If the reasoning is that the PNM is too snobby to pledge a "lower-tier" sorority, that's silly and deserves no sympathy. But there ARE reasons to feel uncomfortable.

[mikewozowski]

i don't post here much so i don't know how to quote.

when you said:

"what the person is really saying is that she does not see herself in a lower-tier house"

you don't know what you are talking about. that may be true for some girls, but i assure you, not all.

my DD dropped most of the old row right away. so, being in a "lower-tier" house was really not a problem for her.

every girl is different, and there are as many different reasons for wanting or not wanting to be a part of a particular house as there are PNMs!

[AnchorAlumna]

Mike, you are right.
And even if the campus is 30% Greek (I don't think it's quite that high), then 70% of the students are NOT Greek.
I hope DD enjoyed recruitment to some extent, met a ton of people, and got a better understanding of Greek life by going through it. There are LOTS of other organizations to join and enjoy being a part of.
She'll do just fine!