Auburn University Recruitment - Fall 2010

[TriDeltaSallie]

Originally Posted by aumom2010

Rush for Cassie is over. The two groups she liked released her. The other group which she definitely feels is wrong for her invited her, but she will not attend unless required to do so.

She is still interested in COB, but we both know that that may not work out for her.

I am probably more upset than she is at this point. I really don't care if she doesn't pledge, but my heart aches for her disappointment. She feels insulted, rejected, and embarrassed right now.

I know lots of wonderful girls are released during the process, but the fact remains that about 800 or more girls somehow measured up, and she was found lacking.

I'm going to go way out on a limb here and hope I don't regret it. And I will also say that I don't know Auburn or the reputations of any of the groups. But I do know what it is like to be in a "lesser" group.

Being insulted, rejected and embarrassed works both ways. The group that apparently wants Cassie and invited Cassie back and she is rejecting feels the same way. (I'm assuming that Cassie has been invited back to one of the "lesser" groups.)

While the PNMs often feel hurt when they are dropped, it works the same way in the chapters. Chapters have rush crushes that drop them and it is very disappointing. It is also hurtful to be in a "lesser" group that has much to offer (both now and after college) and discover that women would rather not be Greek at all than associate with you.

So while I do sympathize with you and Cassie, the rejection and hurt goes both ways. If Cassie (or any other PNM) doesn't accept an invitation to preference, the chapter is insulted, rejected and embarrassed as well.

It is said so many times on GC. She should really at least go to preference. She has nothing to lose and maybe much to gain. But at least she will have finished the process and can make a decision.

[gatordeltapgh]

Originally Posted by TriDeltaSallie

I'm going to go way out on a limb here and hope I don't regret it. And I will also say that I don't know Auburn or the reputations of any of the groups. But I do know what it is like to be in a "lesser" group.

Being insulted, rejected and embarrassed works both ways. The group that apparently wants Cassie and invited Cassie back and she is rejecting feels the same way. (I'm assuming that Cassie has been invited back to one of the "lesser" groups.)

While the PNMs often feel hurt when they are dropped, it works the same way in the chapters. Chapters have rush crushes that drop them and it is very disappointing. It is also hurtful to be in a "lesser" group that has much to offer (both now and after college) and discover that women would rather not be Greek at all than associate with you.

So while I do sympathize with you and Cassie, the rejection and hurt goes both ways. If Cassie (or any other PNM) doesn't accept an invitation to preference, the chapter is insulted, rejected and embarrassed as well.

It is said so many times on GC. She should really at least go to preference. She has nothing to lose and maybe much to gain. But at least she will have finished the process and can make a decision.

I really LOVE your post and thank you for your honesty! I completely understand becasue I have worked with a chapter in a similar situation and it IS really awful and hurful to be on that side of things. This was a lesson I did not learn until I started advising. Like many have said, you only spend a few short years in college and your "sorority life" really takes off after college. The goods news for the chapter I worked with is that our part of the country is a little more forgiving than the south, so with a little work and love the have flourished and accomplished amazing things in a short period of time.

Sallie - I am so glad you didn't pass up an opportunity to be part of an amazing group. I am assuming you are a Tri-Delta from your user-name. Tri-Delta is an amazing group and some of my very favorite NPC mentors are your sisters. Great lesson here. Thank you for posting.

P.S. I love your HQ building!

[TriDeltaSallie]

Thanks for your kind words, gatordeltapgh. It is a different experience and until you live through it you really can't understand it. As an adviser you know what I am talking about.

I'm going to out myself and share that this retro recruitment story was mine. I only used a different name when I wrote it because my sorority name is already in my user name. But I think my story and the eventual results of my choice might be helpful for someone reading this thread. No, I didn't go to Auburn or an SEC school, but sorority life is what you make of it. I received a great blessing in my life by joining Tri Delta, even if it wasn't one of the most desirable groups on campus.

Girls can drop out and decide they are "too good" for the chapter or chapters they have remaining. But today I sit here a member of a GLO with a lifetime of opportunities. I never have to wonder what if.

Originally Posted by gatordeltapgh

I really LOVE your post and thank you for your honesty! I completely understand becasue I have worked with a chapter in a similar situation and it IS really awful and hurful to be on that side of things. This was a lesson I did not learn until I started advising. Like many have said, you only spend a few short years in college and your "sorority life" really takes off after college. The goods news for the chapter I worked with is that our part of the country is a little more forgiving than the south, so with a little work and love the have flourished and accomplished amazing things in a short period of time.

Sallie - I am so glad you didn't pass up an opportunity to be part of an amazing group. I am assuming you are a Tri-Delta from your user-name. Tri-Delta is an amazing group and some of my very favorite NPC mentors are your sisters. Great lesson here. Thank you for posting.

P.S. I love your HQ building!

[aumom2010]

Thanks to those who have posted messages of support and to those who have sent private messages. She is meeting with her Pi Chi, who will probably encourage her to go to the party.

Whether or not to go will be her decision. In the course of being her Mom for the past 18 years, I have found that she has pretty good instincts and almost always makes good decisions, and so I will trust her to make the right decision in this case.

I will probably continue to lurk here for another day or two, but i may or may not post.

She does have another campus activity which will hold tryouts next week. hopefully that will have a better outcome.

And I wasn't going to mention this, but we found out that her grandfather has cancer this week. She doesn't know yet, so please keep her in your thoughts.