UVA/ VA-Tech re-rushing

[abbeyroad3]

Well it sounds like the both of us don't have a chance in hell of getting what we want at all, so we're sticking it out for a month or so.
Well actually my Va-Tech friend has decided to stay, but as long as I drop out before initiation I'm OK, right? To maybe rush again....But I'm still deciding!

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by abbeyroad3

Well it sounds like the both of us don't have a chance in hell of getting what we want at all . . .

If you didn't want the sorority that wanted you, why did you put them down on your pref card?

The sororities you ranked higher didn't rank you higher, if they put your name down at all. If you quit now, no you probably won't get what you want and you may very well be done with Greek life. Worse things have happened.

But if you actually give it a chance -- which means a lot more than just "sticking it out" -- you just might discover that what you got is a whole lot better than what you thought you wanted.

[CougarGrad]

Originally Posted by abbeyroad3

Well it sounds like the both of us don't have a chance in hell of getting what we want at all, so we're sticking it out for a month or so.
Well actually my Va-Tech friend has decided to stay, but as long as I drop out before initiation I'm OK, right? To maybe rush again....But I'm still deciding!

If you wanted to rush again, then yes, you would have to NOT be initiated into the sorority you are currently pledging.

Since you've read this far, read just a little more- I've got a short story for you.

I had a dear friend in college who transferred to our school, where I met her, after attending 2 years at another college. She'd gone through recruitment there twice and never gotten a bid. Blaming that on her older sister "ruining" recruitment for her (older sister was in a chapter on my friend's previous campus), she went through recruitment twice at our school. She WOULD have gotten a bid her first time around, but she didn't want that chapter- so she "suicided" for the one chapter she wanted the most and did not receive a bid, not even a snap bid from someone else. The next year, she tried formal recruitment again, and would have "even" accepted a bid to the chapter that was undesirable to her- but they remembered her from the previous year, of course. She didn't get invited back to enough parties to even make it through recruitment.

Formal recruitment FOUR times, and not once did she get what SHE wanted. One group wanted her once, but she blew them off because they weren't good enough for her.

What you wanted didn't happen this year. It might not happen next year, either. The girls in your current sorority wanted you, but your attention is elsewhere, and you're doing them- and yourself- a great disservice.

To put it bluntly: It sounds like this is your only chance to be an NPC Greek.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by abbeyroad3

Well it sounds like the both of us don't have a chance in hell of getting what we want at all, so we're sticking it out for a month or so.
Well actually my Va-Tech friend has decided to stay, but as long as I drop out before initiation I'm OK, right? To maybe rush again....But I'm still deciding!

Keep up with the 'tude, and they might toss you out before then. Then you REALLY would have fun going through rush a second time.

Loving the Snooki pics, everyone.

[ComradesTrue]

Originally Posted by abbeyroad3

Well it sounds like the both of us don't have a chance in hell of getting what we want at all, so we're sticking it out for a month or so.

Ugh. Why does this have to be about what you want? If you have made it to spring semester of your freshman year of college (oh wait, you are at UVA.. your, ahem, 1st year) and have gotten everything that you want in life then you have led a very charmed existence.

A few things to consider:
1. Recruitment isn't just about what you want. The sororites get to decide what/who they want too... and to be blunt- you weren't it. Sorry if that stings, but it is the way that it goes. In the same way that you don't "want" your current chapter, the other chapter that you did like did not want you enough to have you at the top of their list. Simple as that.

2. Now that you are grown up you will find that life is full of not getting what we want, and often times that turns out to be the best for us. You may not get into the grad school that you want, may not get the job that you want, may not get to date/marry the guy that you want. But guess what? Life has plenty of options and we all not only grow from those type of experiences/short term let-downs, we later realize that "what we wanted" wasn't really the best thing for us after all.

I wouldn't have had my little sister in my sorority, my best friend at college, or even met my husband had each of them "got what they wanted." However, we are all so very happy that my lil sis didn't get her 1st choice chapter (see you aren't the only one!), my best friend didn't get the full ride to her 1st choice college, and my husband didn't get into residency at Hopkins. Life went on for all of them, and not a one of them can imagine life any other way.

I really am just that you came on here and posted this after just one day in your chapter. For crying out loud- give it some time!! And "Sticking it out" doesn't count. Make an effort to get to know those in your new member class and the chapter. This means that you have to BE a friend to MAKE a friend. No sulking, no pity-parties, no grass-is-greener attitude. Invite sisters to lunch. Go out shopping with them. Do something silly together. IT TAKES TIME FOR BONDS TO FORM, and yes, I was yelling.

You are at a great university with a great Greek LIfe. Enjoy it. Don't throw away the fantastic opportunity that you were given.

[VandalSquirrel]

Originally Posted by Psi U MC Vito

Oh God that is funny.

It was worse because my fella's fraternity brother was sitting behind me and was laughing about something (I'm not sure if it was the same thing) and it about set me off. I have a good friend in that course and we don't sit together because one day a diagram looked like men's genitalia and sometimes we're juvenile like that. After class we walked outside and laughed so hard my mascara ran.

If my fella had joined the fraternity he was a double legacy to (through a chapter founder) or the other one he was a legacy to instead of the one he did join we probably never have met. Even though his chapter had their problems and struggles (as did those other two) I wouldn't have met his brothers in classes and had them vouch for him. Good thing he gave it more than twenty four hours and his brothers are still his best friends years later

[Carpe Aeternum]

Before making a decision, talk to a rho chi from who worked with upperclassmen during this rush.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Carpe Aeternum

Before making a decision, talk to a rho chi from UVA who worked with upperclassmen during this rush.

fixed your post. Very good idea.

[ree-Xi]

Originally Posted by girlygirl1

I went through recruitment spring of my freshman year at Virginia Tech. I very reluctantly accepted a bid to my second choice sorority -- I liked them and they are a very good but not "top" sorority. Besides all of that I just knew that I didn't really belong there so I decided to drop out on bid day. I waited my year, got to know girls in my first choice sorority, went through rush again (as a sophomore) and got a bid to my first choice and am as happy as I can be. When I went back through rush and went to parties at the sorority I dropped I really don't think they even remembered me (luckily). They were nice to me and even invited me back to philanthropy round but I dropped them then. I can't speak about rush at UVA -- I think it is much more competitive then here at Tech -- but I am very glad I followed my heart and did what was right for me.

Interesting first post. Just sayin'.

[FSUZeta]

Originally Posted by girlygirl1

I went through recruitment spring of my freshman year at Virginia Tech. I very reluctantly accepted a bid to my second choice sorority -- I liked them and they are a very good but not "top" sorority. Besides all of that I just knew that I didn't really belong there so I decided to drop out on bid day. I waited my year, got to know girls in my first choice sorority, went through rush again (as a sophomore) and got a bid to my first choice and am as happy as I can be. When I went back through rush and went to parties at the sorority I dropped I really don't think they even remembered me (luckily). They were nice to me and even invited me back to philanthropy round but I dropped them then. I can't speak about rush at UVA -- I think it is much more competitive then here at Tech -- but I am very glad I followed my heart and did what was right for me.

what was different with your recruitment this time around, i.e., did you have recs. vs. no recs. the first time, did you get involved in other orgs. on campus, did your gpa improve, had you made a lot of friends in your #1 choice, such good friends that you hung out with #1 a lot? what do you think turned the tide in your favor the 2nd time around?

[33girl]

Originally Posted by FSUZeta

what do you think turned the tide in your favor the 2nd time around?

The fact that it happened in the Imaginarium.

[abbeyroad3]

Originally Posted by girlygirl1

I went through recruitment spring of my freshman year at Virginia Tech. I very reluctantly accepted a bid to my second choice sorority -- I liked them and they are a very good but not "top" sorority. Besides all of that I just knew that I didn't really belong there so I decided to drop out on bid day. I waited my year, got to know girls in my first choice sorority, went through rush again (as a sophomore) and got a bid to my first choice and am as happy as I can be. When I went back through rush and went to parties at the sorority I dropped I really don't think they even remembered me (luckily). They were nice to me and even invited me back to philanthropy round but I dropped them then. I can't speak about rush at UVA -- I think it is much more competitive then here at Tech -- but I am very glad I followed my heart and did what was right for me.

Um...THANK YOU. That's all I can think to say. Everyone has been telling me that I must stick it out, but I'm really glad you understand what it's like to just not feel like the perfect fit. Reading this was a huge comfort to know that whatever I decide, it may not be the end of the world.

[ASTalumna06]

Originally Posted by girlygirl1

I went through recruitment spring of my freshman year at Virginia Tech. I very reluctantly accepted a bid to my second choice sorority -- I liked them and they are a very good but not "top" sorority. Besides all of that I just knew that I didn't really belong there so I decided to drop out on bid day. I waited my year, got to know girls in my first choice sorority, went through rush again (as a sophomore) and got a bid to my first choice and am as happy as I can be. When I went back through rush and went to parties at the sorority I dropped I really don't think they even remembered me (luckily). They were nice to me and even invited me back to philanthropy round but I dropped them then. I can't speak about rush at UVA -- I think it is much more competitive then here at Tech -- but I am very glad I followed my heart and did what was right for me.

Originally Posted by abbeyroad3

Um...THANK YOU. That's all I can think to say. Everyone has been telling me that I must stick it out, but I'm really glad you understand what it's like to just not feel like the perfect fit. Reading this was a huge comfort to know that whatever I decide, it may not be the end of the world.

But she doesn't understand what it's like to just not feel the perfect fit, because she didn't give that chapter a chance, either. And why did she not give them a chance? Because, as she said, they weren't a "top" sorority. She dropped out for the same superficial reasons that you seem to believe are so important.

And to drop, go through recruitment again, and then get your top choice (i.e. "the best" sorority, according to you) is a RARE occurence. Plus, girlygirl doesn't attend the same school as you. You would be wise to wait a little while, because either way, you're bound for a year.

[violetpretty]

Originally Posted by abbeyroad3

Um...THANK YOU. That's all I can think to say. Everyone has been telling me that I must stick it out, but I'm really glad you understand what it's like to just not feel like the perfect fit. Reading this was a huge comfort to know that whatever I decide, it may not be the end of the world.

Clearly you just want good news, and you don't care what kind of no-name GCer said it or where she goes to school or how common such an event is. Such occurences are the exception (especially at UVA and Tech), and they can only happen when you do something to improve yourself next time.

Thing is, it doesn't make a difference whether you drop out now or wait until right before initiation to drop, because you can't rush again until Spring '11. You might as well try your hardest to find your place in the chapter.

[Barbie's_Rush]

Originally Posted by abbeyroad3

Well it sounds like the both of us don't have a chance in hell of getting what we want at all, so we're sticking it out for a month or so.
Well actually my Va-Tech friend has decided to stay, but as long as I drop out before initiation I'm OK, right? To maybe rush again....But I'm still deciding!

Magic eight ball says:

Originally Posted by girlygirl1

I went through recruitment spring of my freshman year at Virginia Tech. I very reluctantly accepted a bid to my second choice sorority -- I liked them and they are a very good but not "top" sorority. Besides all of that I just knew that I didn't really belong there so I decided to drop out on bid day. I waited my year, got to know girls in my first choice sorority, went through rush again (as a sophomore) and got a bid to my first choice and am as happy as I can be. When I went back through rush and went to parties at the sorority I dropped I really don't think they even remembered me (luckily). They were nice to me and even invited me back to philanthropy round but I dropped them then. I can't speak about rush at UVA -- I think it is much more competitive then here at Tech -- but I am very glad I followed my heart and did what was right for me.

How awesome is it that you happened to find this forum just in time?