Should you join a "lower tier" sorority?

[Denise_DPhiE]

I rushed three locals at my college. The "best" did not offer me a bid for membership which I was crushed for about a day or two then one of the other two did. They were the heavy, less attractive party girls. I loved what I saw but I didn't want to be in a local. Had I joined, I would have pledged a local hard then affiiliated with PSS a year later. Great group but at the time I would not have known that.

I wound up seeing three groups during expansion, our choices were DZ, DPhiE and AOII. We chose DPhiE. To some that might be insane but it was the right group meeting with the right reps from HQ/extension team. We clicked.

Would we have been better off with another group? We'll never know but we absolutely loved every minute of our undergrad (and for me alumna) careers.

You do have to look down the IIKA! (kidding)

[BrandNewAdvisor]

I pledged a low tier sorority and I have not regretted it.

When I joined my chapter it was generally regarded as the worst on campus. I joined during informal recruitment, this was after a formal recruitment where quota was in the mid 20s and my chapter took 1 new member. After the informal period the pledge class was at 5. Total was 50 and my chapter was at 25. All the other chapters were at or over total.

It was hard at first especially walking around in a bid day shirt and having friends make comments. I didn't understand because my experience with my sisters and my pledge class was the complete opposite of the stereotype. We were social, athletic (we were all involved with at least one sports team), and straight.

We were also motivated. A group of 10 of us (about half the chapter) were generally fed up with the crappy reputation. We had one or two mixers a semester when other sororities had that many a week. We also had business type meetings 3 to 5 nights a week (I'm not exaggerating). By my sophomore year my entire pledge class held offices and we were determined to change.

We graduated a lot of dead weight and didn't let anymore in. We looked for quality members not just numbers, sometimes at the dismay of our advisor and nationals. We made every effort to be social and social in an attractive way. There was one sister who continually acted inappropriately in social situations. Instead of letting her get away with it, we reported her butt to standards and got it taken care of. We made friends and joined other groups and clubs. We always spoke positively of the sorority in public and kept drama behind closed doors (something not done At All in the past).

I ran recruitment my junior year and had a good long chat with out recruitment advisor about how things got so bad and looked at where exactly things were going wrong.
Progress for us was having girls put us on the pref card at all. Generally when we were all that was left for a girl in recruitment she dropped. Our overlap was with the most popular chapter on campus and most girls suicided.

Long story short after much effort by my senior year we took quota plus, had mixers every other week. We handled business more efficiently and only had one or two business meetings a week. Only the people who needed to be there were and it helped with burnout. We were at 40 members the highest in 8 years. I visited campus the year after I graduated and was hanging out at my fiance's fraternity. I was asked if I belonged to a sorority by a freshmen and when I answered it was the first time it elicited a positive enthusatic response.

I just started advising at a chapter that is in a similar situation that mine was in and hopefully I can help them to turn it around. You just have to want it bad enough.

Your sorority experience is entirely what you make of it. Join the lower-tiered sorority and make it what you want it to be. Be willing to work and ask for help when you need it, from the national organization and from panhellenic.

Forgive the long post, this is a topic I feel really strongly about. If all those girls that suicided decided to join my chapter it would have never gotten as bad as it did and could have turned around so much faster.

[DubaiSis]

Originally Posted by BrandNewAdvisor

If all those girls that suicided decided to join my chapter it would have never gotten as bad as it did and could have turned around so much faster.

I don't necessarily agree with this. Although I definitely have said similar things here, the fact is it takes a lot of work to make those kinds of changes, and some girls just don't want to do the work.

During formal rush at the small house I ended up pledging I was told pretty much straight up, "we're small, but you can take on a leadership role much sooner with us" and that part is definitely true. I wish the smaller houses would be more straight forward in acknowledging their size. It will turn off some girls but might turn on the lightbulb for girls who might see the value in the smaller group. The girls aren't blind so you might as well just address the situation.

[BlueCarnation]

When I joined my sorority, I had some clue about who was considered "top tier" but I just wanted to be in a sorority and I preffed at the ones where I liked the girls. Looking back now, I guess my chapter would have been considered in the "lower tier," but I certainly didn't think so. We had leaders on Panhel, we were a big house, we won a lot of campus awards, and we had lots of fun parties. And we had a very close sisterhood. From what I hear now, we are considered one of the "top tier" on campus and the houses that I would have considered "top" are now "lower." It seems like it changes every year. It's so hard to keep track, and frankly I don't think it should matter.

Like others have said, I guess it depends on why you're joining a sorority. You make the experience what it is. And what may be "top" on your campus may not be elsewhere.

[blueberrymuffin]

I would like to share with you an experience I had with a "lower tier" chapter. I just transferred to a big state university as a junior and a new colony was recruiting for its first new member class. There was talk in the dorm that all the sororities made quota in formal recruitment except one and that one was a "lower tier" chapter. I thought it might be a good idea to see if this chapter would be interested in me so I spoke to a woman in Greek Life about this and she said she would contact this chapter and see if they would be interested in talking to me. I told her I did not expect them to just give me a bid but just meet with me and see if we would be a good fit for each other. They never got back to me and I joined the new colony. I am very happy being a new member of the colony and don't know or care what "tier" we are in because I really like the other new members and we are all very excited about the future of the colony but I just wonder why this "lower tier" chapter didn't even think they should even talk to me.

[littleowl33]

Originally Posted by blueberrymuffin

I would like to share with you an experience I had with a "lower tier" chapter. I just transferred to a big state university as a junior and a new colony was recruiting for its first new member class. There was talk in the dorm that all the sororities made quota in formal recruitment except one and that one was a "lower tier" chapter. I thought it might be a good idea to see if this chapter would be interested in me so I spoke to a woman in Greek Life about this and she said she would contact this chapter and see if they would be interested in talking to me. I told her I did not expect them to just give me a bid but just meet with me and see if we would be a good fit for each other. They never got back to me and I joined the new colony. I am very happy being a new member of the colony and don't know or care what "tier" we are in because I really like the other new members and we are all very excited about the future of the colony but I just wonder why this "lower tier" chapter didn't even think they should even talk to me.

It may not be that they didn't want to talk to you - it may be that the message never got to the appropriate person, or that they weren't sure what you wanted (if they were not in the recruitment period). Honestly, sometimes things fall through the cracks. We had an alum fairly upset with us because she tried to contact us about her daughter, who was a freshman interested in rushing, and we never got back to her. It turns out she was emailing an old email address that we don't use anymore. I'm glad you're happy with your new colony! Just don't be too hard on the other group.

[BrandNewAdvisor]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

I don't necessarily agree with this. Although I definitely have said similar things here, the fact is it takes a lot of work to make those kinds of changes, and some girls just don't want to do the work.

During formal rush at the small house I ended up pledging I was told pretty much straight up, "we're small, but you can take on a leadership role much sooner with us" and that part is definitely true. I wish the smaller houses would be more straight forward in acknowledging their size. It will turn off some girls but might turn on the lightbulb for girls who might see the value in the smaller group. The girls aren't blind so you might as well just address the situation.

All is an exaggeration.
But my chapter was in a position that one or two more people every recruitment over the 6 or 7 year decline would have made a world of difference. If the chapter wasn't so bad it wouldn't have needed all the effort it took for a major overhaul.
The leadership angle was a selling point but it didn't override that it would be leadership in that chapter. Once in the chapter there were quite a few resignations of girls who were burnt out there was never a semester where you could not hold at least one position. It was all work and no fun and it was known around campus that that was the case. It was hard to meet people outside of the chapter because it was hard to be involved in anything else.
It's harder to make a connection with PNMs when there's one active to 3 of them. Fixing that issue greatly increased our retention rates. My school used deferred recruitment so most girls going through formal had connections with girls in other chapters. My chapters members weren't involved in other groups, and just generally didn't socialize outside of there already established circle so they didn't have advance connections. Basically we didn't connect with girls before recruitment and weren't doing a good job during.

For PNMs thinking about a lower tiered chapter: It takes a lot of work but I don't want to make it sound intimidating because it isn't. My chapter even at its smallest was incredibly loving and supportive. The sisterhood was strong we just had to let everyone else know that. Most of things we did to turn the chapter around were fun and I would have been doing them anyway. We just had to be louder about our affliation while doing it.

[Save Ferris]

Why don't we reverse the question? Should you join a "higher tier" sorority? Should that make a difference to you?

If your feelings are genuine about the sorority you hope to join, tiers aren't important. I understand that not all PNMs think like this and worry about what other people think of them.

Should you join a "lower tier" sorority? I would say yes, but only if you truly like them. If you don't like them because of lack of connection, you don't belong there and SHOULDN'T join them. If you connect with them and don't join because of worrying about what people think of you, that's stupid.


(And by "you", I'm just speaking in general)

[DubaiSis]

I think the point is moot about whether or not you should join a top tier chapter. Everyone wants to be one of the popular girls, so that's the easy decision. The tough decision is to bite the bullet and join the smaller or less impressive one. There are things that are great about joining a smaller house and as we all know joining a sorority is a great thing in general, so joining a smaller group may not get you that "top girl on campus" reputation, but you'll still get loving support, sisterhood, lifelong friendships, etc.

And I think that's where the rubber meets the road for a PNM. For some girls, like it or not, they are just never going to be comfortable being known as a member of a less than prestigious chapter. And I think that's a shame, but that's me. And I think the lightbulb comes on (am I mixing metaphors again?) when it's basically too late in their college careers to make it right.

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

And I think the lightbulb comes on (am I mixing metaphors again?) when it's basically too late in their college careers to make it right.

But that's what AI is for, right?


[Running for cover]

[littleowl33]

Originally Posted by BrandNewAdvisor

I pledged a low tier sorority and I have not regretted it.

When I joined my chapter it was generally regarded as the worst on campus. I joined during informal recruitment, this was after a formal recruitment where quota was in the mid 20s and my chapter took 1 new member. After the informal period the pledge class was at 5. Total was 50 and my chapter was at 25. All the other chapters were at or over total.

It was hard at first especially walking around in a bid day shirt and having friends make comments. I didn't understand because my experience with my sisters and my pledge class was the complete opposite of the stereotype. We were social, athletic (we were all involved with at least one sports team), and straight.

We were also motivated. A group of 10 of us (about half the chapter) were generally fed up with the crappy reputation. We had one or two mixers a semester when other sororities had that many a week. We also had business type meetings 3 to 5 nights a week (I'm not exaggerating). By my sophomore year my entire pledge class held offices and we were determined to change.

We graduated a lot of dead weight and didn't let anymore in. We looked for quality members not just numbers, sometimes at the dismay of our advisor and nationals. We made every effort to be social and social in an attractive way. There was one sister who continually acted inappropriately in social situations. Instead of letting her get away with it, we reported her butt to standards and got it taken care of. We made friends and joined other groups and clubs. We always spoke positively of the sorority in public and kept drama behind closed doors (something not done At All in the past).

I ran recruitment my junior year and had a good long chat with out recruitment advisor about how things got so bad and looked at where exactly things were going wrong.
Progress for us was having girls put us on the pref card at all. Generally when we were all that was left for a girl in recruitment she dropped. Our overlap was with the most popular chapter on campus and most girls suicided.

Long story short after much effort by my senior year we took quota plus, had mixers every other week. We handled business more efficiently and only had one or two business meetings a week. Only the people who needed to be there were and it helped with burnout. We were at 40 members the highest in 8 years. I visited campus the year after I graduated and was hanging out at my fiance's fraternity. I was asked if I belonged to a sorority by a freshmen and when I answered it was the first time it elicited a positive enthusatic response.

I just started advising at a chapter that is in a similar situation that mine was in and hopefully I can help them to turn it around. You just have to want it bad enough.

Your sorority experience is entirely what you make of it. Join the lower-tiered sorority and make it what you want it to be. Be willing to work and ask for help when you need it, from the national organization and from panhellenic.

Forgive the long post, this is a topic I feel really strongly about. If all those girls that suicided decided to join my chapter it would have never gotten as bad as it did and could have turned around so much faster.

This is such an inspiring post! I don't know if you saw my earlier post, but my chapter has had a similar path. Things never got as bad as you describe (1 new member on bid day, with a quota of 20+, is pretty dismal), but we weren't in a good place. I'm so glad you were able to turn things around, and I hope my chapter can do as well as you have. Quota plus would be awesome!