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Why do chapters have bid MATCHING?
Because the entire point of recruitment is to find where you want to be, and to have the chapters find the people they want.
The last thing that you want is to be somewhere where the sisters don't like or feel comfortable with you. Why would you want to spend the next 4 years in that environment simply to wear the "best" letters?
Coming from a school that only does COB, sometimes I think it's even harder to realize that you have to explore all of your options, because every PNM has the ability to only look at one chapter if they so chose.
And although it hasn't happened often since I've been a sister, I've seen girls not receive bids (after only having come to our recruitment parties), and then they're devastated when they don't. And it's SOOO hard from our side. Especially in the COB system we have. We have open events, and girls are able to come to any recruitment party that we have. But when they only come to ours, they limit their options. And it's funny, because if they really wanted, they could attend parties for all three sororities, receive bids for all three, and then decide which one they want to sign and accept. But some people are so focused on one group that they miss the big picture.
I joined the smallest chapter on my campus, and the one that, at the time, was the least prominent, in terms of being well-known. I realized that I, along with a few others, could be the positive change the chapter needed, especially in terms of numbers. And I'm now their Recruitment Advisor, and the chapter has had a record number of PNMs attend recruitment events this semester.
Leading up to my receiving a bid, I had talked to sisters from all three chapters for quite some time before I was a new member. I loved all of the girls that I talked to. But sisters from one chapter who were in a class with me just talked to me and would mention the sorority... one or two girls from another chapter (one of which was my RA) asked me to go to recruitment events... and one member from another chapter called me on the night of a recruitment event, asked me if I wanted to go, and offered to walk to my dorm to get me so that I didn't have to walk into the recruitment party by myself.
Which chapter do you think I joined?
In addition to loving the girls of this group, I realized they really wanted me to be part of their sisterhood.
And while this kind of thing obviously would only happen with informal recruitment, from what I can tell, during formal, girls really look way too deeply into the phrase, "I hope to see you tomorrow," and the like. They take one positive thing and think, "I don't even have to try with these other orgs." They think that their future is mapped out because they had one good conversation with one girl who really liked them. And while it's exciting, they shouldn't simply base their decisions upon something so minuscule in the scheme of competitive sorority recruitment.
As for how girls react after not receiving a bid to where they originally wanted to be... that depends on the person. Some people just walk away from the experience and figure that Greek life isn't for them. Some people resent the chapter that turned them away, and/or they resent all Greeks in general. Some people realize their mistakes and they try again.
The whole point of Greek life is to make friends (within all of the chapters), to serve your campus and community in a positive way, and to find where you belong... not where you think you should be based on a house, a reputation, or which colors you think are the prettiest.
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I believe in the values of friendship and fidelity to purpose
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