Pledge possibly lying about military service..

[33girl]

Originally Posted by adpiucf

I've no doubt your other members have embellished their accomplishments or lied about things before-- would this make-or-break their membership?

Umm, wow, no, you are really on the wrong path here. There's a difference between saying "I was dating 3 girls at a time!" (when 2 of them were imaginary) and lying about ACTIVE DUTY MILITARY SERVICE. That's a big big BIG deal. That's kind of like saying your parents are dead when they're not.

And I don't think that scoobis said at all that they ONLY bid him because he was a vet - rather that it was one of the many things they liked about him. But if he's been trading on this as a way to get to know people and it's not real, it's certainly not the fraternity that should be chastised.

Someone who would lie about something this big, I wouldn't trust any further than I could throw him, and I certainly wouldn't want him in my Greek organization.

[PM_Mama00]

Originally Posted by adpiucf

Would you ask any other pledge to furnish proof of prior employment?

Is he a good pledge? Does he get along with everyone? If he'd make a good brother, don't worry about it. Call him up to a standards meeting, tell him what was said and give him a chance to explain.

I'm not defending someone who lies, or discounting that someone who lies about something may lie about something else-- something that could affect the reputation or integrity of the chapter. But if your whole reason for pledging this guy was so you could say "We have a war vet in our chapter," that's weak. I'm as much for recruiting the best members, and you want certain bragging rights, but I would hope there was more to this guy than just his work record that compelled you to bid him.

I've no doubt your other members have embellished their accomplishments or lied about things before-- would this make-or-break their membership?

What does it matter if he's a good pledge? If he lied, then HE LIED.

And just confronting him... pathological liars will keep lying. Do you really think he'd just come out and be like "yeah I lied about my duty". Screw that.

[bellwisdom]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Umm, wow, no, you are really on the wrong path here. There's a difference between saying "I was dating 3 girls at a time!" (when 2 of them were imaginary) and lying about ACTIVE DUTY MILITARY SERVICE. That's a big big BIG deal. That's kind of like saying your parents are dead when they're not.

And I don't think that scoobis said at all that they ONLY bid him because he was a vet - rather that it was one of the many things they liked about him. But if he's been trading on this as a way to get to know people and it's not real, it's certainly not the fraternity that should be chastised.

Someone who would lie about something this big, I wouldn't trust any further than I could throw him, and I certainly wouldn't want him in my Greek organization.

33girl, I was going to say all of that but you beat me to it. Also if he lies about being in the military then he would lie about anything. Would you really have trust for someone like that? I couldn't. There would be no trust. He can't be no Brother if he lacks trust from the Brotherhood for being a liar, especially a lie like that. How could you trust him with your Fraternity secrets? But to the person who posted this, I would sit down with the guy and tell him what you heard. Do some investigating. I know that at my school you can actually go to greek affairs to find out if a pledge or any incoming students interested in greek life were in the military. If he was not, then he has got to go.

[als463]

Actually, this guy does not have to be a college "graduate" to become an officer. In fact, you only need 90 credits to become an officer but, before you try to become a Captain-you must have your Bachelor's by then.

He may have also done the OCS program (Officer Candidate School). You can be in the military like the Guard and go to school while one-weekend-a-month going to your OCS station. There is an accelerated program and a traditional program (which I think trad. takes 2-3 years, whereas the acc. program is pretty quick).

I also joined the military when I was 17 (with permission of my parents-signing). I went to basic between training between the end of my junior year and the beginning of my senior year in high school and later went to AIT the summer after I graduated high school. I was in college for a semester (in 2002) before I was called up to serve in Iraq. When deployments first started (when I went) in 2003, they didn't always last a full year. In fact, I was deployed for a total of 9 months. I served 2 in the states training up to go with my unit, 1 month in Kuwait and 6 months in Iraq. I later returned to school in 2004 (since by the time I returned, in October 2003 the semester was already in session). I still remembered everyone-and they remembered me. So, it is quite possible for your brother to have had an experience like mine.

I even joined the ROTC program but, still did drills with my unit one state over (4-hour trip one way) since I had gone overseas with them-they put me in a special MI program. Between receiving my Associate's, 2-Bachelor's Degrees and a minor, along with all my other involvement in school (not to mention my sorority) and my military service during that time--I chose not to stick with ROTC. I liked the program but, I was unsure what I wanted to do with myself after graduation. Maybe your brother is in the same boat. So, yes it is possible he did serve and did do ROTC but, it became too much for him (especially-if he is like me and pays his own way without the financial help of his family).

Give him the benefit of the doubt but, def. talk to him. No one deserves to be lied to whether it's about dating a million and one girls or being in the military because it's about respect. You should respect your friends and your brothers / sisters.....

[Coramoor]

Two things.

It will be too easy to get accurate info. Like it was already suggested, just go talk or send a friendly email to his Battalion CDR. The email address will be on the school's rotc homepage. Tell him your concerns, and point out that you need this info because it's an integrity check.

Second, again like someone pointed out, if this guy is lying about his service-DROP his ass before it is too late. He may keep up appearances for awhile, but eventually his lying will catch up and by that time it will be too late.

[navane]

Originally Posted by als463

Actually, this guy does not have to be a college "graduate" to become an officer. In fact, you only need 90 credits to become an officer but, before you try to become a Captain-you must have your Bachelor's by then.

It sounds to me like you are referring to DCO for the Army Reserves, yes? You mentioned the Guard and attending OCS on drill weekends. There are a bazillion and one different military programs and, as I mentioned before, without having more info from scoobis (about branch, program, enlisted or officer, etc), it's hard to say with any certainty what this guy may or may not have done. You know how it is, too many acronyms to consider!

I also joined the military when I was 17 (with permission of my parents-signing). I went to basic between training between the end of my junior year and the beginning of my senior year in high school and later went to AIT the summer after I graduated high school. I was in college for a semester (in 2002) before I was called up to serve in Iraq. When deployments first started (when I went) in 2003, they didn't always last a full year. In fact, I was deployed for a total of 9 months. I served 2 in the states training up to go with my unit, 1 month in Kuwait and 6 months in Iraq. I later returned to school in 2004 (since by the time I returned, in October 2003 the semester was already in session). I still remembered everyone-and they remembered me. So, it is quite possible for your brother to have had an experience like mine.

Your situation basically fits into the scenario I described when I said, "For this story to make any sense..." Which, conveniently enough, is apparently what scoobis understands to be the case about his friend.

Given your experience and background, do you think your former ROTC colleagues would have the gall to say, "Nah, she never went to Kuwait or Iraq, she's making that up."?

At any rate, you must have had some ups and downs between 2002-2004! Thanks for serving!

.....Kelly

[als463]

Originally Posted by navane

It sounds to me like you are referring to DCO for the Army Reserves, yes? You mentioned the Guard and attending OCS on drill weekends. There are a bazillion and one different military programs and, as I mentioned before, without having more info from scoobis (about branch, program, enlisted or officer, etc), it's hard to say with any certainty what this guy may or may not have done. You know how it is, too many acronyms to consider!



Your situation basically fits into the scenario I described when I said, "For this story to make any sense..." Which, conveniently enough, is apparently what scoobis understands to be the case about his friend.

Given your experience and background, do you think your former ROTC colleagues would have the gall to say, "Nah, she never went to Kuwait or Iraq, she's making that up."?

At any rate, you must have had some ups and downs between 2002-2004! Thanks for serving!

.....Kelly

I'm sorry if it sounded as though I was trying to correct you-you had all your information correct....but, as you stated...Yes-there are way too many acronymns in the military-so, that can be very confusing....

I doubt people in ROTC would say that about me. Generally-I dealt with some really great people. You never know, though-some people are just mean...maybe they would have tried bringing that kid down....

I didn't really have any downs between 2002-2004 except that it kind of sucked I was "older" when I joined my sorority (I was 21) so I felt REALLY OLD some of the time-thankfully...the sisters were very sweet about the whole thing...As far as thanking me for my service-THANK YOU....I understand that not everyone agrees with the war (as a Conservative-I'll admit there are things I am starting to re-think and re-view on my part regarding war all together) but, it irks me when people put down the military for doing their job so I want to THANK YOU for being respectful of the military and also for representing your GLO so well!

I hope all works out with this pledge!!!

[chopperLI905]

Plain and simple all you have to do is say that someone wants to see his DD 214 and/ or ERB (Enlisted record belief) or ORB (Officer Record belief). They all will have years of service, deployments, and awards. If he cant produce anyone of them given a day or so, then kick him out and report him to the Police/ MP's to take care of him.

[gee_ess]

Bump

Just wondering how this worked out...