Conduct Becoming of A Sorority Girl

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

As for a member that is pregnant, I think that asking her to take alum (not inactive) status is reasonable. I don't see how she could possibly raise a child (especially as a single parent) AND fulfill all sorority obligations...

I have to disagree with this. If a sister gets pregnant, she should be given a choice -- have the option to stay a collegian or opt for alumna status. 99.99999% of the time she'll choose alumna status, but simply ASKING her to go alum is unfair, IMO.

I wasn't at this Convention, but a sister once told me about the business meeting that included a very heated discussion about pregnant members. Naturally the traditionalists favored automatically changing her status to alum and the liberals favored giving her a choice. It was a very sensitive topic and lots of sisters were hurt regardless of the outcome.

Originally Posted by blackngoldengrl

Yes, please do! It's annoying getting drinks spilled on a new dress or cute outfit, even when it's by a sister. Not to mention slipping on spilled drinks or falling on broken glass. Also, NO smoking on the dance floor please! I've been burned twice...not cool.

Which is why I totally love the whole "NO DRINKS ON THE DANCE FLOOR!" rule many bars/clubs have out here.

Okay...back to your GDI discussion, sorry!

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

Originally Posted by OTW

I have to disagree with this. If a sister gets pregnant, she should be given a choice -- have the option to stay a collegian or opt for alumna status. 99.99999% of the time she'll choose alumna status, but simply ASKING her to go alum is unfair, IMO.

I wasn't at this Convention, but a sister once told me about the business meeting that included a very heated discussion about pregnant members. Naturally the traditionalists favored automatically changing her status to alum and the liberals favored giving her a choice. It was a very sensitive topic and lots of sisters were hurt regardless of the outcome.



Which is why I totally love the whole "NO DRINKS ON THE DANCE FLOOR!" rule many bars/clubs have out here.

Okay...back to your GDI discussion, sorry!

I guess here the issue would be her commitment...I just DON'T see how she could keep the obligations of a sister and raise a child...I mean even some students have a hard time meeting requirements. Much less students with a BABY. Our chapter is too small for deadweight...even if she doesn't mean to be, she is. It would be different if she gave it up for adoption of course.

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

I guess here the issue would be her commitment...I just DON'T see how she could keep the obligations of a sister and raise a child...I mean even some students have a hard time meeting requirements. Much less students with a BABY. Our chapter is too small for deadweight...even if she doesn't mean to be, she is. It would be different if she gave it up for adoption of course.

I agree with you...

But I really think that the membership decision and evaluation of commitment should be totally left up to her...NOT the chapter.

[AGDee]

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

I guess here the issue would be her commitment...I just DON'T see how she could keep the obligations of a sister and raise a child...I mean even some students have a hard time meeting requirements. Much less students with a BABY. Our chapter is too small for deadweight...even if she doesn't mean to be, she is. It would be different if she gave it up for adoption of course.

One of the chapters I've worked with has had more than one member with a baby. In fact, both were mothers before they joined the chapter. It depends on the campus, really. This was a commuter campus where all the women lived at home with their parents. The one member I knew well had a lot of support from her parents who, in spite of her mistake early in life, wanted her to still have a "typical" college experience and helped her do that. She was everything BUT dead weight as she was the VPF. She had great grades and, from what I observed, was a good mom. Different chapters require different time commitments.

I was at that Convention, btw.

And, like Susan314, I am from a chapter in Michigan where the non-Greeks touted their GDI status proudly. They called themselves that more than the Greeks did. In fact, my own mother told me that she was a GDI when she was in college and was proud of it.. and she went to college in 1956.

[ErinIsBadNews]

Where in the world is the GC member who has Gamma Delta Iota in there signature??? I would've liked to see what their opinion on all this was?

Originally Posted by ErinIsBadNews

Where in the world is the GC member who has Gamma Delta Iota in there signature??? I would've liked to see what their opinion on all this was?

If I'm not mistaken, that'd be GDIfly.

[ErinIsBadNews]

Originally Posted by OTW

If I'm not mistaken, that'd be GDIfly.

Yes! Where are you GDIfly???

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by AGDee

One of the chapters I've worked with has had more than one member with a baby. In fact, both were mothers before they joined the chapter. It depends on the campus, really. This was a commuter campus where all the women lived at home with their parents. The one member I knew well had a lot of support from her parents who, in spite of her mistake early in life, wanted her to still have a "typical" college experience and helped her do that. She was everything BUT dead weight as she was the VPF. She had great grades and, from what I observed, was a good mom. Different chapters require different time commitments.

I was at that Convention, btw.

And, like Susan314, I am from a chapter in Michigan where the non-Greeks touted their GDI status proudly. They called themselves that more than the Greeks did. In fact, my own mother told me that she was a GDI when she was in college and was proud of it.. and she went to college in 1956.

My mom went to school in the late 70's and got paddles with the GDI on it
Course I think she was a flirt cause she has a LOT of paddles from guys.
(I know I'm repeating myself but that was a long time ago)

[RHITDeltaGal]

It's interesting to see people think of GDI as a negative term. When I went through recruitment, one of the first things that happened was my RA called all the girls on my floor into a meeting and made sure we were all aware that after preference night, everyone would have "letters" associated with them, whether it be DDD, XO, or GDI. It was never a negative thing on my campus. In fact, the people here joke about it and even hold "GDI" parties and things like that. I think the phrase just depends on where you come from and what you've heard it as.

[UGAalum94]

About members with babies, I think that it might be something that the chapter have general recommendations on based on the campus culture.

On some campuses, it's going to be no big deal, and the group might encourage women to stay active.

On other campuses, and this might seem superficial and wrong, it's likely to cause harm to the chapter in recruitment and reputation, and since it's difficult to imagine on some campuses how a person would handle both obligations well (again, it varies a lot by the campus), maybe a particular chapter could have recommendations that a young pregnant member go alum.

I don't want to see chapters cut people loose when the women most need support and help, but at campuses where greek life is a pretty superficial endeavor of rush, reputation, housing and parties, it's hard to see how staying active would be in anyone's best interest.

Maybe because I don't have kids, I make it out to be a bigger deal than it really is, but once you're a mom, it seems to be that your priorities ought to be different, and at some campuses, staying active would reflect trying to hold on to a lifestyle incompatible with good motherhood.

Ultimately, the final decision should rest with the member, but I do think the chapter should try to have general recommendations in place before the issue comes up.

[BabyPiNK_FL]

My pledge class had at least two already mothers with adorable little boys and one girl who announced that she was pregnant before initiation. In addition to this, at that same time, we had a sister who was well into her "baby bump" within the chapter. While that was an abnormal baby overload at the time, we have had sisters with children in the past, including a 30 year old around 2003 or so with an eight year old. That's not the norm, but it's not unusual and right now we don't have any actives with babies. That's just our way I guess!