Thoughts from Someone Who Went Through Formal Recruitment

[Anonymity]

Hello! I've noticed a good amount of questions about formal recruitment. I recently went through recruitment and I'd like to write about my thoughts and tips about it while they're still fresh in my mind. To keep some anonymity about my situation I prefer to not disclose how my recruitment ended. I will say that I have been a greekchat lurk for a while! This is just a compilation of thoughts and tips in different situations that happened during my recruitment!


Issues I ran into:

Not being invited back to a particular chapter:
As everyone knows, sorority recruitment is a mutual selection process. Although you may want a particular chapter at your school, it doesn’t mean that the chapter wants you which is NOT a bad thing! It really isn’t fun to not be asked back but there always is a reason. If you think about it, the members of a chapter have a better idea of the type of person that would fit in with their chapter. It wouldn’t make sense to be in a sorority when it’s not easy to fit in with the girls in the chapter.

Being invited to other chapters I didn't want:
Keep going! If you were invited back to meet other chapters then go! Not all chapters are the same and it’s worth your time to explore the different characteristics of the chapters. I was not invited back to the chapter I had wanted going into recruitment but it was the best thing that ever happened to me! The other chapters that I was left with were a much better fit for me and I found that I enjoyed talking to the other girls a lot more!


What to do when visiting the house of a chapter you don’t want:
Don’t sulk! There is no reason to sulk! There’s no reason to not try and enjoy yourself while you’re there! Smile! Laugh! If you’re there, you might as well have fun!

When talking to other girls:
Be yourself! I am sorry to admit how mistaken I was because I believed that there were such things as sororities for dorks. While I was visiting these sorority houses I really let my guard down because I didn’t feel the need to impress them. I just talked. When I look back on it, I felt like I had to impress the other chapters and I didn’t relax as much as I should have. The chapters that I thought that were so dorky probably saw the real me. Although you should be on your best behavior at rush it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t relax. There’s no need to try and impress anyone. What the chapters are looking for are real girls so be yourself!

When you don’t receive a bid or you receive a bid from a chapter you don’t want:
Think about what you want to do next. There are options! If you have the time, you can go through formal recruitment again. There is always informal recruitment as well! If you feel like there’s a void in your life from not being in a sorority try and find ways to fill it. Try volunteering through clubs! Just do something.


How My Recruitment Ended:
On Preference Night, I was invited back to two sororities that I felt like I had not connected with. Throughout recruitment, I had picked which chapters I wanted to visit again based on how much I enjoyed being at the house. I found it easy to talk to all the different chapters but I did have more fun at some more than others. I ended up withdrawing from recruitment after Pref. night because I didn't want both chapters to waste a bid on me. I had heard about girls staying in a chapter for a couple of weeks and then dropping but it didn't feel right to do that because even accepting a bid feels like a big and very meaningful comittment.



**2nd Edit!**

What I Am Doing After Formal Recruitment:
I definitely will go through formal recruitment a second time. I have a full year to do things that would help me look more appealing on paper. I have about a 3.3 GPA and I plan on raising it as much as I can this school year. One of the disappointments of not being in a sorority this year is that I don't get to participate in the philanthropies. Each chapter at my school does something amazing that benefits the community and their charities. To fill that void, I'm participating in a volunteer program through one of the school clubs that will visit shelters and hopefully more. I also plan on tutoring and volunteering at the local middle school and high schools. The volunteer program makes me feel better since I can still do something to benefit the local community.

I was thinking about doing informal recruitment but I decided to wait because I would like the chance to visit each chapter again. That's just a personal choice. Not being invited back to certain chapters for formal recruitment did some damage to my self-esteem and that doesn't seem like a normal reaction. I've had some depression over family problems in the past year and that baggage is not something I want to take with me to a sorority. I think I need to take this year to settle those issues.

If there's anything else I can add to this please let me know.