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I don't see a problem getting three happy meals to squelch a drama episode, easy as pie.
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I missed the part where parenting is supposed to be easy. If your primary goal is to squelch drama, don't have kids. Teaching them how to behave like civilized guests (and how to eat healthy, homemade food) is not the fun part. It's the hard, necessary part.
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what's the problem with them NOT eating stuff they don't like? It seems to me like it's just a control thing.
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If it's just one thing, and they've tried it and don't like it, then it shouldn't be a big deal as long as they are eating other nutritious foods. But first, some kids are rejecting entire categories of food that are necessary to a balanced diet, like all vegetables. Skipping spinach is fine if you eat broccoli, zucchini, cabbage, and lettuce; it's not OK nutritionally to skip all that stuff. The OP's nieces are basically skipping the whole meal to go right to dessert unless the "meal" is greasy garbage like nuggets and fries. They're learning terrible habits that may hurt their health someday.
Second, it can be about control on the kid's part, too. There are plenty of kids who may not actually hate the food; they want to prove that they're in charge and they don't have to do what Mom says. Of course Mom should pick her battles, but a kid forcing Mom to make three separate meals for family members is probably enjoying the control more than the nuggets.
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