I DONT DRINK and IVE NEVER TRULY PARTIED, IS THIS BAD,

[adpiucf]

Wow. This thread turned into a train wreck.

LovePwrGrl -- you probably would not be happy if you joined a sorority. There is no expectation that you must drink or party, and no pressure to make you do so. However, Prospective New Members are regarded critically because your words and conduct now are indicative of how you might fit with the chapter. A sorority member is an unofficial Public Relations ambassador for her organization. Your words and conduct are not looked at as simply your own, but representative of the entire organization.

You may think it is ok to use the "n" word because you are black, but you are offending blacks and whites who do not approve of this word. I lived in Houston. I have never heard a black person use this word in my presence or in the presence of others, black or any other color, and expect that it would be laughed off. It is recognized throughout the United States as bad word. Black leaders have spoken out against its use-- even by other blacks.

If you must use this word, and I hope you do not, you should only use it around people whom you know won't be offended by it. If you become a sorority member and you say that word or call somebody a homo, others will believe that this is the feeling of all members of your sorority. You claim to want to join a diverse sorority. This type of language would not be welcome. Ever. Period.

Put the shoe on the other foot. Imagine you are a member of the sorority. One of the members does or says something that is immoral and causes a lot of controversy on campus. People will be looking at YOU differently, as if you shared this person's controversial and negative beliefs. It does not matter that you are against it. Her acts will be imputed to you because you shared this affiliation.

So you still want to join a sorority? First, apologize for offending so many people by using such hateful words on this message forum. I never said anything bad to you, and merely by posting those words in a public place, you have offended me and many others who have never even said "boo" to you. Ladies do not use these words. Ladies may be women of any race or ethnic background. Sorority women are ladies. If you want to be a sorority woman, you should start acting like one.

Second, put your MySpace and Facebook pages on private, and watch your words and conduct carefully in real life and online. Is this unfair? Isn't this hiding who you are? Of course not! It's a an exercise in maturity and discretion. These things will serve you well once you leave college and enter the workforce.

You should most defintely join the organizations that are right for you where you can be yourself, but the older we grow, and the more we involve ourselves in various types of selective organizations, the more we must exercise some discretion over the things we say and do.

From what I have read in this thread, I would be very hesitant about inviting you to join my sorority, if I were a UH sorority woman. You may disagree, but Greek Chat has been my only experience and impression of you. What have I seen? You have insulted others, made racially and sexually harassing statements, acted in a way that indicates you feel you are superior to others, and continued to instigate and flame mean spiritedness for your own enjoyment. This is not the way to behave when you are the newcomer to any situation or place. Further, I am reasonably sure your family and church would be very unhappy and ashamed if they knew you spoke this way. The Internet provides a certain level of anonymity, but there is no excuse for this display.

I am sorry if any of the Greek Chat members incited you, but you took it far above and beyond defending yourself against being a "troll." In that, I do have doubts about your character and intentions to join a sorority. You may want to stick to other activities where you may not feel as restricted in your choice of words and treatment of others.