Dear Butt and Thighs,
We have had a great relationship some ups and some downs. I thank you for being there when I needed you so many times like to get in the club for free in college, snagging Mr. Wonderful1908, saving alot of time money and energy in so many situations. However you seem to want to play a bigger role in my life and I am sorry but that can't be. I mean when we were a size 8, it was so beautiful, don't you remember? I was so grateful you didn't get when I had my daughter. However since she has been born you realy have gotten bossy. I was chill at a 10 but now my size 12's are getting a little to close for comfort, and I will be gosh darned if we ever take it past a 12! I know you think hey she's 5'9" she has a little room but sorry we are not going there with eachother. I know yes some of it is my fault I have been baking cookies left and right and what starts out as one ends up as a dozen

, but you know me and I will no longer tolerate it. So you can fight me if you wand but I refuse to go back to work fatter than I was after I had my baby!!! Oh hayle naw!!!