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				MSN Pet Peeves
			 
 
			
			I just received this in an email and I thought it was funny enough to share with everyone.I'm sure we all know people like this, and I must admit I am guilty of one or two of them sometimes.
 
 The "Away" Person -
 
 This person is either saying "Hi I'm never here but I leave my MSN on
 in the
 hope that SOMEONE will message me while I'm out so I feel important" or
 they're saying "I'm here but I only want to talk to a privledged few
 people
 while everyone else thinks I'm NOT here".  To this person I ask:
 Why are you a) so shallow or b) such a dick?
 
 The "Away" Person part II-
 
 This person signs in and immediately switches their status to "Away"
 EVERY
 time.  To this person I ask: why do you sign into a chat program
 designed to
 talk to your friends only to walk away from your computer as soon as
 you
 sign in? Either you're incredibly retarded and entirely miss the
 concept of
 internet instant messaging or you are a huge asshole because you think
 you
 are too good to talk to anyone.
 
 The "Busy" person -
 
 This person has his/her status set to "Busy" more often than not and
 when
 you try to talk to them they either don't respond or tell you that
 they're
 "working on an essay/project/assignment" or whatever.  To this person I
 ask:
 If you are too busy to talk on MSN then why are you signed in? The
 function
 of MSN IS TO CHAT with your friends....there is no other excuse to have
 it
 on because it serves no other purpose....so what you're really saying
 is not
 that you are "too busy to talk" it's that you are "too busy to talk to
 ME or
 anyone else but a select few people who you deem privledged
 enough"...otherwise you'd shut it off so that you could do your work.
 If
 that's the case then tell me and I'll understand which is much better
 than
 the incinuation that you think I'm too retarded to see that you have a
 "cool
 list" that I'm apparently not on.
 
 The "Multiple sign inner" -
 
 This person signs in ever two seconds because of computer difficulties.
 GET
 IT FIXED...it's fucking annoying.
 
 The "Frequent Name Changer" -
 
 I can see changing your n ame to something cool when you hear it or
 when
 something truly cool happens to you; but when every three minutes
 you're
 changing your name during every song you hear on your 500 song Winamp
 playlist to some "deep" lyric is also really fucking annoying
 
 The "Chronic Complainer" -
 
 If you escape death in a car wreck, or overcome some scary disease or
 have a
 wicked story then I probably want to hear about it.  If you have too
 much
 homework and the sniffles and change your MSN name to whatever daily
 complaint you have, you can go fuck yourself.  If it's winter in Canada
 it
 is likely that A LOT of people are sick and most with worse shit than
 you're
 complaining about.  People with cancer would give their right arms to
 have
 whatever you're bitching about instead of what they have....and if you
 go to
 school and you have too much work or just pulled and all nighter, BIG
 FUCKING DEAL...EVERYONE has homework and EVERYONE has had to do an all
 nighter at some point .  These people I also call "Sympathy Fishermen"
 because they complain about everything so someone will say "ooh you
 poor
 thing how DO you mange to get by?".  SUCK IT UP.  The only people I'd
 ask
 that question to are people fighting cancer or starvation in 3rd world
 countries or kids who get every limb blown off by bombs in war torn
 countries; NOT you and your curable ailment...fuckin pussy
 
 The "Vanishing Person" -
 
 This complaint is NA if the person is drunk or stoned.  If you talk to
 someone who is drunk and stoned this is to be expected...this person
 gets up
 from their computer in mid conversation and forgets about you....to
 this
 person I say: Get some manners and at least end the conversation or
 tell
 them that you will be back...I mean this is like putting the phone down
 in
 mid conversation and going to take a shit without saying anything.
 Where
 did you people grow up?
 
 The "Grammar Police" -
 
 This person feels the need to n ot only correct each spelling mistake
 they
 make but to make fun of  yours as well....fuck I didn't realize I was
 writing an essay here, if you know what I mean then stop being a first
 class
 loser and grow the fuck up.  If you feel like correcting every errant
 letter
 you write that's your perogative but holy shit calm the fuck down when
 I do
 it.
 
 This is all I can think of tonight but others include people who use
 way too
 many abbreviations.  Like, ttyl, lol, and lmfao are legit but when you
 start
 getting into shit like hsiadaf to say "holy shit I am as drunk as fuck"
 and
 expect people to know what you're saying you're just weird....anyway, i
 started this but I bet it's nowhere near finished so feel free to add
 to it
 and send it off....
 
 Chris O'Neil
 University Of Ottawa
 
			
			
			
			
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