Do's and Don'ts of sex - Page 12

#**166** 07-02-2003, 12:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dianne
and the number one thing that KILLS me:
If it looks like I am really enjoying it and I may be close to glory, DON'T suddenly change position, angle, speed, ANYTHING!!! Not only will I not cum, but I will be pissed that I got so close and then you screwed it up!!!

AMEN!!!!

Rudey · #**167** 07-02-2003, 01:13 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Arya
Don't stick a dildo up my arse and say "Who's the b*tch now?"

Don't conduct in any other position other then the missionary position in Florida. It's illegal.

Do call me "Big Pappa Pump"

OK seriously, you need to stop dating girls that treat you like this.

-Rudey
--Once again, I'd like to reiterate the fact that you are all deviants.

stmuprncez · #**168** 07-03-2003, 07:26 PM

DO make sure that I want to before you assume I do... but most of the time... I DO

DON'T move me if I'm moaning loud let me finish where I'm at and then we can move

DO kiss me but not so hard that I lose concentration from other things...
DON'T just kiss me on the mouth.

DO tell me that you liked it.
DON'T tell your fraternity brothers what you liked about it!!!

DO want to do it again either immediately or first then when we wake up in the morning... I'll wake you up the old fashioned way

DON'T compare me to any Porn movies!

PM_Mama00 · #**169** 07-04-2003, 02:58 AM

DON'T get so messed up on some weird pill that you look like you have Parkinsons Disease and then have sex with me.

DON'T have sex in a room with no air conditioning when it's 80some degrees out at nite.

DON'T get so messed up before sex that you are fallin all over me.

moe.ron · #**170** 07-04-2003, 10:36 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by RUgreek
not anymore, anti-sodomy laws have been repealed, enjoy the oral and anal sex in sunny florida all you want.

RUgreek

Forgot bout the ruling.

Queencece · #**171** 07-04-2003, 04:03 PM

This thread is so funny!

Do:

Try new places
Kiss me all over (not sloppily)
Try new positions
Bring out the romantic in me
LISTEN to me and my ideas (they are always the bomb!)
Let me enjoy the after glow
Massage me (this is a must)
Talk to me during the act
Cuddle

Dont:

Leave after its over (unless I put you out)
Hold on to me, when there is a fight outside my door (I wanna see it even though its a mood killer)
Come through the front door, for the world to see (booty calls only)
Lie to me about size because when I see it (Imma laugh and put you out)

Thats all I can think of right now, but guys are a trip!

Peace
Q

D_Chi_Zinni · #**172** 07-04-2003, 04:07 PM

Do: take the top, and forcefully is a plus
Dont: get mad if it takes a while, some of us would like to be a minute man every once and a while

Dont: be all touchy feely on the member at a party and then forget about that after you lead me back to your room.
Do: tell me during the day that you want to be naughty right then and there

Do: be controlling, there is nothing hotter than a girl who knows what she likes and demands it

PM_Mama00 · #**173** 07-05-2003, 02:27 AM

OMG please don't tell me it's ok to give u head outside cuz ur family is inside and no one will come outside.

DON'T, when your mom walks outside and catches us, get up and tell your mom that you were just gettin great head and that she ruined it.

DON'T leave me outside with your mom so I have to listen to her stories of how she's been caught before and that I shouldn't be embarrassed and that if he wants to hook up with me he should bring me inside. Or make me listen to how some people think it is romantic to do sexual things outside.

HOW EMBARRASSING!

James · #**174** 07-05-2003, 01:06 PM

That is very funny!

Quote:

Originally posted by PM_Mama00
OMG please don't tell me it's ok to give u head outside cuz ur family is inside and no one will come outside.

DON'T, when your mom walks outside and catches us, get up and tell your mom that you were just gettin great head and that she ruined it.

DON'T leave me outside with your mom so I have to listen to her stories of how she's been caught before and that I shouldn't be embarrassed and that if he wants to hook up with me he should bring me inside. Or make me listen to how some people think it is romantic to do sexual things outside.

HOW EMBARRASSING!

Peaches-n-Cream · #**175** 07-06-2003, 06:32 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by PM_Mama00
OMG please don't tell me it's ok to give u head outside cuz ur family is inside and no one will come outside.

DON'T, when your mom walks outside and catches us, get up and tell your mom that you were just gettin great head and that she ruined it.

DON'T leave me outside with your mom so I have to listen to her stories of how she's been caught before and that I shouldn't be embarrassed and that if he wants to hook up with me he should bring me inside. Or make me listen to how some people think it is romantic to do sexual things outside.

HOW EMBARRASSING!

WOW!

Lady Pi Phi · #**176** 07-06-2003, 08:22 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by PM_Mama00
OMG please don't tell me it's ok to give u head outside cuz ur family is inside and no one will come outside.

DON'T, when your mom walks outside and catches us, get up and tell your mom that you were just gettin great head and that she ruined it.

DON'T leave me outside with your mom so I have to listen to her stories of how she's been caught before and that I shouldn't be embarrassed and that if he wants to hook up with me he should bring me inside. Or make me listen to how some people think it is romantic to do sexual things outside.

HOW EMBARRASSING!

Are you serious?!

I would have died of embarrassment!

edited to add: DO talk dirty, but DON"T treat me/ talk to me like I'm a dime store hooker!

PandaOnProzac · #**177** 07-06-2003, 08:27 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by PM_Mama00
OMG please don't tell me it's ok to give u head outside cuz ur family is inside and no one will come outside.

DON'T, when your mom walks outside and catches us, get up and tell your mom that you were just gettin great head and that she ruined it.

DON'T leave me outside with your mom so I have to listen to her stories of how she's been caught before and that I shouldn't be embarrassed and that if he wants to hook up with me he should bring me inside. Or make me listen to how some people think it is romantic to do sexual things outside.

HOW EMBARRASSING!

That deserves a big WTF.

veemers · #**178** 07-09-2003, 09:30 PM

My add-ons:

DON'T make me feel beautiful while it's happening and then ignore me the next day.

When you're walking to the bed, DON'T strut like you're the king of the world. Cockiness is a huge turn-off.

DO feel free to tell me what you want. Just remember that subtlety is key. How and when you tell me these things is important!

and finally...

DON'T tell me that you can't use condoms. I do my part of the birth control method; you do yours.

PM_Mama00 · #**179** 07-14-2003, 01:22 PM

How bout a follow up to my bein walked in on story?

In his room last nite and his mom is in the kitchen...

Aunt: Where's Josh at?
Mom: Prolly gettin his d&*^ sucked.

OMG.

Anyways, please do last a lil longer than 5 minutes. Thank you.

GMUBunny · #**180** 07-14-2003, 03:52 PM

Do- Learn to control your left leg for clutching so it doesn't get all wobbly when I'm giving you head on the interstate.
Feel free to bite me, just don't draw blood
Smack that ass

Take off your socks! Nothing ruins it more for me than if you're totally naked but still have your socks on.

Don't- Worry about getting picked on cuz your floormates can hear me through the walls. They're just jealous.
Drip sweat on me, please....yuck
Ask for anything that you aren't willing to give/receive in return (ex. oral sex, anal sex, etc.)
Worry about your roommate walking in. I'm in my element and what he sees is his fault. The big black X on the door shoulda been enough warning.

ETA: Don't be afraid to laugh during sex. There's no way you can keep a straight face when our bodies make that farting noise when we're that close together. Take a second for both of us to laugh it off, and then get back into the action.