Am i going too fast?

[alphaiota]

okay, need some help. having a little trouble here in love town. so where do i start. well, bob's been sick for about a week now, which means shelley hasn't seen bob in a week. on top of him being sick, he's been working a lot. this is nothing new figuring he works about 50hrs a week ususally and those 50hrs are at random times depending on when the story happens, the meeting is held, or the event is taking place. for instance, he didn't get out of the office til 12 something in the morning the other night. and no, i know he's not cheating on me.

i'm just really sad that i can't see him or be with him much. he doesn't want to get me sick so that's just made it that much harder for us to see each other. i call him almost everyday to see how he's feeling and just say hi. nothing wrong with that, he loves to hear from me. but i need help dealing with not being able to see him. i know he's frustrated too, but i don't know what to do. we just had it out on the phone a little while ago, which is why i'm posting this now.

has anyone else had to deal with this type of situation? not having time to see your bf b/c one or both of you are too busy? please help.

shelley j
sigma k

[alphaiota]

i posted this on another thread in here, but just to keep up on this thread i'll share here too. so i got to see my boy yesterday. i was so happy to spend time with him. i stopped by after work and we just had a great time. he took me out to grab some dinner and then we just spent time together at his place. i was smiling ear to ear when i left.

although, i'm still concerned that he won't end up coming to my dad's b-day party. did i already tell yall about this? well, my dad is turning 60 this week and we are having a huge party for him. a lot of people from out of town are coming in for it. like my grandpa (85yrs old), my aunt, my brother and sister in law, and some friends from pennsylvania.

so this is a huge deal for me to have him come to the party. only problem is he hates to meet new people. he's somewhat intraverted and not overly social, which is odd cuz i'm extremely social. i can walk up to a complete stranger and just start a conversation. he would never do something like that.

so needless to say, he really doesn't want to come to the party. but i told him he had to make that sacrifice for me since i sacrificed and met his ex-gf. he said he'd be there, but that he had to report on this big event going on in town that same night. my guess is that he's going to try and draw out this other event a bit so he doesn't have to come to the party til closer to the end. it starts at 7, but he probably won't be there til 8 or 9. what do yall think?

shelley j
sigma k

[Lady Pi Phi]

Hi Shelley,

I don't mean to bust in on your forum like this, but I thought, if you didn't mind, I'd like to give my $.02

Anyhoo, It sound to me like your guy has a little bit of social anxiety. He's probably nervous all the time meeting new people, but now that he's in line to meet family members he's probably a little more apprhensive. I'm sure he wants to make a great impression on your family, but it may be feeling a little anxious that he won't. Maybe you could talk to him about it. Let him know you understand his feelings, but you would really appreciate it if he was at the party.

I think it's only fair that he go, afterall you did have to meet his ex-girlfriend.

I hope everything works out.

PPL,

Emily

[alphaiota]

emily!!! long time no see! how have you been? pm me.

shelley j
sigma k

ps - we have talked about it. and he's already met my parents once. if he doesn't come, he might not have a gf.

[DigitalAngel126]

So how'd everything end up?

[alphaiota]

well, he came to the party. he got there by about 7:30. he was wonderful. i introduced him around and he chatted it up a bit. he had a really good time. unfortunately, my family didn't get much of a chance to sit and talk with him b/c we were all trying to be so social with everyone else at the party. lots of fun though. he earned major brownie points w/ me and the rest of the family.

i have a picture of him now. i need to post it somehow. i can get a digital pic too. if someone would be so kind as to help this illiterate computer person, i'd be so obliged.

oh yeah, so i've been chatting a bit with his ex-gf who i've become friends with. he's just loving that. (yeah right). she asked him tonight while we were over for dinner if he'd told his mom about me yet. he hasn't. so she's going to make sure that we have that taken care of soon. it's not that he doesn't want his parents to know, he just hasn't said anything. as he puts it, they haven't asked. i'm not concerned though. i know i'll meet them soon.

shelley j
sigma k

[alphaiota]

so it's been over a month now since i last updated so here it is......
WE BROKE UP

long story short, i was going too fast. we just aren't at the same point in our relationship and it's not working. i'm not happy in the relationship and he doesn't want to see me unhappy. i told him i expected to be treated like the queen i am. he basically agreed that i do deserve that, but he's not quite at a point that he can do it. we are still friends, but for now i don't want to see him or be around him until my hearts had some time to heal.

shelley j
sigma k

[Aquastar]

:hug: Im sorry things didnt work out, but Im glad you know what you are looking for and you wont settle for something else.
<3

[DigitalAngel126]

giiirrlll!!!! Wierd, I was totally about to post to this thread today to ask for an update.. I'm sorry things aren't totally working out at the moment, but you never know, some things just have a way of working out - - maybe there will be a second time around. Well girl, you know we're all here if you wanna talk

[sueali]

I'm so sorry, you will find someone who is on the same path as you are and everything will fall into place. I've seen many of my sisters struggle (w/men) and then watched them get married. Just trying to shed some hope for the future. LISK