Did you have support?

[Aerylle]

Originally Posted by Elephant Walk

or

?

What?

[Aerylle]

Originally Posted by ree-Xi

Then don't bring it up if you don't need to. It's not like you're hiding it or keeping it secret, but your worlds don't all have to intersect. Why give them the power to disapprove? Unless you are asking for their opinions, in which case, they are entitled to think what they want. Doesn't mean you don't have to listen (unless it's a parent forbidding it and withholding your tuition money).

Then who do you suggest I talk to about this? If I can't talk to my mother (who is my best friend) or my friends about this, and my boyfriend isn't a girl (obviously) and doesn't really care other than it'll make me happy, then who should I talk to about it?

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by Aerylle

What?

Support garments.

Originally Posted by Aerylle

Then who do you suggest I talk to about this? If I can't talk to my mother (who is my best friend) . . . then who should I talk to about it?

But you said your mother is supportive and willing to do anything to help.

[Aerylle]

Originally Posted by AXiDMeesh

To answer your question, no I did not have any support from my family and my good friends. The only people who were excited for me were girls in my graduating class who had joined a chapter the year before (I joined as a sophomore). My family wanted me to join my legacy sorority in another council, and my friends thought I was kidding when I said I wanted to join and completely (and they still do this) tuned out whenever I talk about anything Greek related. But I went through recruitment and I had a LOT of fun and it was such a great experience that I'd do it again and take the criticism tenfold. My whole mindset was that I'm doing this for myself, not for my mom or anyone else.

And MysticCat, maybe she's from one of those really close knit communities where your neighbors might as well be extended family?

Anyway, I think you should go for it.

Right now, that's what my mindset is. I've always wanted to do this, but never said anything to anyone because the community I grew up in just.. wasn't Greek at all. I didn't know anyone who was involved with this.

[Aerylle]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

But I'm guessing that the friends and neighbors who are not supportive are also not in a position to provide recs. It sounds like her network doesn't include any Greeks and that the people in her network aren't aware of any other Greeks they may know.

That is true (so far, haven't contacted everyone yet). But either way, someone might have a family member or a co-worker or something. You never know where you'll find someone.

[Aerylle]

Originally Posted by ree-Xi

Are you in HS?

As for recs, I am SURE that there are girls in your current school who are pursuing recs (unless you go to one of those k-12 day schools with 11 people in your graduating class). Ask your friends who plan to go Greek in college. Also, there are a hundred threads on recs here.

Nope. I graduated last year.

And, sadly, no. None of my friends are interested in going Greek. They think its silly and all the nasty rumors about greek life is true. ]:

[Aerylle]

Originally Posted by MaggieXi

Also if you are still friendly with anyone who graduated from HS a year ahead of you, you may want to ask them if they know anyone who is in a sorority who they could put you in contact with. I know some sororities (not all) allow current members to write recs. If an active sorority member can't write you a rec, maybe they can put you in touch with alums in your area that could.

I'm doing just that. I have contacted everyone I know that has joined one, but so far, they haven't gotten back to me on who wrote their recs/if they can write me one. I've tried locating the local alumni group with little luck. I'd ask on here but I'm too paranoid to say where I live. Ha ha.

[Aerylle]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

Support garments.

But you said your mother is supportive and willing to do anything to help.

She is, but she also doesn't understand my wanting to do this. She is supportive in the fact that she will ask around at work for alumni. She is supportive in the fact that she will help with the money. But I can't go gushing to here about how I think I like XYZ sorority better than ABC, or how MNO all had red hair, etc etc.

I could, but it would be like talking to your father (assuming you are a girl) about your period or boy problems. He'll listen, but he might not have much to say or would be awkward with his responses.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by Aerylle

I could, but it would be like talking to your father (assuming you are a girl) about your period or boy problems. He'll listen, but he might not have much to say or would be awkward with his responses.

He probably would have been speechless, since I'm a guy.

[ree-Xi]

Originally Posted by Aerylle

I'm doing just that. I have contacted everyone I know that has joined one, but so far, they haven't gotten back to me on who wrote their recs/if they can write me one. I've tried locating the local alumni group with little luck. I'd ask on here but I'm too paranoid to say where I live. Ha ha.

Plus, since no one knows you, you are really A. taking a chance that someone could send in a No-Rec, or B. feel kind of used. Your "joking" last sentence leads me to believe my first gut feeling - that you were looking for someone here to hook you up.

Are you a sophomore? Know ANY current Greeks on a first-name basis? Ask them for suggestions on where to go to meet/talk to alumnae who might be willing to meet you and write a rec. (Note: chapters may or may not accept recs from CURRENT chapter members). Instead of saying "do you know anyone who...?", ask "who do you personally know that might be able to point me in the direction of alumnae to meet?"

Have you read the RECRUITMENT forum??

[Aerylle]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

He probably would have been speechless, since I'm a guy.

Kay, then switch "father" to "mother" and "period/boy problems" to "Penis size/condom problems."

... Lol.

[Aerylle]

Originally Posted by ree-Xi

Plus, since no one knows you, you are really A. taking a chance that someone could send in a No-Rec, or B. feel kind of used. Your "joking" last sentence leads me to believe my first gut feeling - that you were looking for someone here to hook you up.

Are you a sophomore? Know ANY current Greeks on a first-name basis? Ask them for suggestions on where to go to meet/talk to alumnae who might be willing to meet you and write a rec. (Note: chapters may or may not accept recs from CURRENT chapter members). Instead of saying "do you know anyone who...?", ask "who do you personally know that might be able to point me in the direction of alumnae to meet?"

Have you read the RECRUITMENT forum??

Okay, I am NOT here looking for that (look at my previous post, I never asked if someone could write me one, I asked where to find locals to write me one).

No, I'm not a sophomore. I will be a freshman. It's a really long story that I'd rather not re-hash back out. I have read the recruitment forum, I've spent long hours pouring over my schools recruitment stories, tips and tricks, bad advice, stories with both good and bad endings. I <3 the recruitment forum.

[Aerylle]

Originally Posted by ree-Xi

A. taking a chance that someone could send in a No-Rec, or B. feel kind of used.

"No-rec"?

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by Aerylle

"No-rec"?

When filling out a rec, it is possible for someone to "no rec" you, which means check the box that basically says "I would not recommend this woman for membership." (for whatever reason).

[Aerylle]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

When filling out a rec, it is possible for someone to "no rec" you, which means check the box that basically says "I would not recommend this woman for membership." (for whatever reason).

Ah. So I take it asking local's to write recommendations for me isn't a good idea.

So rushing to a school where I've heard recs are important when I have no recs..