9 Charged after girl kills herself over bullying

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by 33girl

That would make a lot more sense. Thanks.

I know that back in my day I would have rather DIED than told parents or teachers about being bullyed - but it was such a different era. The computer is as much a part of these kids' lives as TV was ours - just turning it off really isn't an option unless you want to completely divorce yourself from society. As others have said, it's not like when you could come home, lose yourself in TV or radio or a book, and forget about it for an evening and steel yourself to face another day. It's like how a lot of grown people can't ever leave their job behind because of cell phones, PDAs & computers. Not only that, I think seeing it written down just makes it 100x more hideous.

Yeah and this is why I believe in having the family computer (the one the kids get to use) in the kitchen and parents having the password for the kid's Facebook (if the kid gets a facebook at all--I hate FB and think very little comes from having one, oh well) and other social network sites/message boards.

Parents need to turn off their phones, PDAs, and even the TV during family time--unless it's family TV time. In other words, technology really sucks and parents are in charge of how much control technology has over their households and family interactions. Keep technology either at work or in the home office as much as possible. I prefer the "if it ain't an emergency--get a life, spend time with your family--and holla at me tomorrow."

If, after dinner and family time, you (in general) decide to read Greekchat () that's fine as long as it doesn't impede on supporting and monitoring your family and checking on what the kids are up to.

[rhoyaltempest]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

This is a "contagion effect."

All of these kids don't have diagnosable and documentable mental and emotional disorders that contribute to their suicide response. Many of them have observed that suicide is a "quick fix" and (as is the case in many suicides, particularly for certain age groups and for females more than males) some of them may've been crying out and attempting suicide but no one found them and saved them before they killed themselves.

These are children, so I expect for them to be extremely short sighted, of little faith, and selfish (or even perceivably cowardly) in most endeavors. Therefore, when buffers are weakened or absent in their lives, it "makes sense" that more kids are choosing suicide when they feel there are no other quick fixes. Family only matters but so much for kids--kids get to an age where it seems as though they'd rather be liked by their peers than anything else. It is sad because fast forward a few years and they could've said what a lot of people say, which is "I remember when I was 10 and I was bullied--I was tormented. I was soooo depressed...thank God I got over that hurdle and didn't harm myself or others."

Suicide increases with age and is highest for those over the age of 50, so it's really interesting when suicide rates increase in the younger age groups. There are a number of explanations for this.

This does not at all mean that they did not have such disorders and if you do the research, you will see that such disorders in children and adults have greatly increased over the years due to many factors. We are not only a physically sick society but we are also more and more becoming a mental and emotionally sick society and we are doing it to ourselves in many many ways.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by rhoyaltempest

...if you do the research....

I conduct quantitative and qualitative research in suicide and self-harming behaviors. I also attend symposiums where people from different fields and approaches to the study and treatment of suicide debate and share their take on suicide.

What now?

[rhoyaltempest]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

I conduct quantitative and qualitative research in suicide and self-harming behaviors. I also attend symposiums where people from different fields and approaches to the study and treatment of suicide debate and share their take on suicide.

What now?

Not talking about suicide as a stand alone but rather more about psychological disorders in children. They are on the rise, and for adults also. Our physical well being can be directly linked to our mental and emotional well being. We are creating our own problems, all of us as a society, through everything from environmental issues to nutrition to modern medicine. So since we are all part of the problem or at least contributors, we need not throw away folks or be insensitive to these issues; could be our loved ones next. And I'm just speaking generally. We are so quick to be insensitive to other human beings or shell out blame when the issues don't personally impact us.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by rhoyaltempest

Not talking about suicide as a stand alone...

Suicide is never a stand alone. Isn't that what you're saying, afterall? Therefore, researching and discussing suicide would include discussions and evaluations of some social, mental, and emotional correlates.

This doesn't mean that everyone agrees that all suicides are a result of mental and emotional disorders. I obviously do not.

Originally Posted by rhoyaltempest

So since we are all part of the problem or at least contributors, we need not throw away folks or be insensitive to these issues; could be our loved ones next. And I'm just speaking generally. We are so quick to be insensitive to other human beings or shell out blame when the issues don't personally impact us.

Surely you didn't get this from my post. If you did, it is because of your assumptions of my tone and meaning.

Never make assumptions because you don't know whether the person you disagree with has already been personally impacted. But, at the same time, you don't have to be personally impacted by everything to know about it.

[srmom]

http://cbs11tv.com/local/school.bull...2.1601141.html

Here is a case where the boy "manned up" and dealt with it, everyone doing the appropriate thing, talked to his parents, parents talked to administrators, etc. yet the shithead bullies still didn't stop until the kid ended up in the emergency room with a torn rectum from a wedgie.

Parents wanted kids punished by school, not enough response, so they went to the cops. What was the punishment? Supervised counseling

Boy, that's gonna show them.

As to the situation with this poor girl who committed suicide and the 9 bullies.

I wonder how the parents of the bullies are feeling now? From things I've read online, these kids had horrific facebook pages, with one of the girls brother's status saying, "N****** suck, White Power!" Lovely. Real paragons of virtue, these ones.

Regardless of the eventual punishment, be it jail time or "supervised counseling", these kids lives are ruined. In this day and age of Google, with your history following you forever, they'll be plenty punished when they cannot repair their reputations, get into college, or get a job.

[rhoyaltempest]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Suicide is never a stand alone. Isn't that what you're saying, afterall? Therefore, researching and discussing suicide would include discussions and evaluations of some social, mental, and emotional correlates.

This doesn't mean that everyone agrees that all suicides are a result of mental and emotional disorders. I obviously do not.



Surely you didn't get this from my post. If you did, it is because of your assumptions of my tone and meaning.

Never make assumptions because you don't know whether the person you disagree with has already been personally impacted. But, at the same time, you don't have to be personally impacted by everything to know about it.

I am careful not to conclude "all" regarding anything since you can never be too sure and no, I didn't get that from your post. Just speaking generally and actually had another post in mind.

[deepimpact2]

Originally Posted by rhoyaltempest

Comments like this are very insensitive and shows a lack of understanding. Just like adults some teens (and children for that matter) suffer from clinical depression (most don't even know it) and some folks were born this way, with an unbalanced brain chemistry that may not allow them to see things as rationally as you or be as positive as others. Such problems are made worse by environmental issues and poor nutrition, which we can all agree is greatly impacting adults and children in our society. Whether a choice or not, most people do not choose to committ suicide over such things so obviously something is wrong. Let's not invalidate an experience (which human beings love to do) just because we can't personalize it. Also, whether a child can "man up" or not will depend on these factors as well as their upbringing.

There is no lack of understanding on my part. I don't even classify what I said as being insensitive. Just like we should not condone kids picking on one another, we should not act as though it is okay to use suicide as a way out. Period.

I was bullied in elementary school. My parents stepped in, but I also got tired of the crap and took matters into my own hands. That was the end of that.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by srmom

Parents wanted kids punished by school, not enough response, so they went to the cops. What was the punishment? Supervised counseling

Maybe my parents were more kick-ass but they never completely relinquished control over my outcomes to other adults.

Parents need to remember that they have more of a vested interest in their child's well-being than the school and cops ever do. Don't sit back and wait. That might require going to the school for an early lunch break, putting your child in a self-defense program, or taking the kid to a new school (I wouldn't want my kid in a school full of adult idiots, anyway).

[Prettyface08]

Originally Posted by srmom

http://cbs11tv.com/local/school.bull...2.1601141.html

Here is a case where the boy "manned up" and dealt with it, everyone doing the appropriate thing, talked to his parents, parents talked to administrators, etc. yet the shithead bullies still didn't stop until the kid ended up in the emergency room with a torn rectum from a wedgie.

Parents wanted kids punished by school, not enough response, so they went to the cops. What was the punishment? Supervised counseling

Boy, that's gonna show them.

As to the situation with this poor girl who committed suicide and the 9 bullies.

I wonder how the parents of the bullies are feeling now? From things I've read online, these kids had horrific facebook pages, with one of the girls brother's status saying, "N****** suck, White Power!" Lovely. Real paragons of virtue, these ones.

Regardless of the eventual punishment, be it jail time or "supervised counseling", these kids lives are ruined. In this day and age of Google, with your history following you forever, they'll be plenty punished when they cannot repair their reputations, or get a job.

Were their names published? Just wondering, because if not, how will they be punished by their reputation or by not getting a job. If it isn't on their records or in their background checks how will people know them from a can of paint?

[deepimpact2]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

Yes, if only those stupid kids would just act and think like adults.

Maybe after we can get all adults to do that we can start expecting it of kids.

That has nothing to do with acting and thinking like an adult.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by rhoyaltempest

I am careful not to conclude "all" regarding anything since you can never be too sure and no, I didn't get that from your post. Just speaking generally and actually had another post in mind.

Be careful not to speak generally and have another post in mind when you're responding to my post.

I was responding to the assertion that ALL people who consider, attempt, and commit suicide are doing so because of mental and/or emotional disorders because suicide is a disease.

[deepimpact2]

Originally Posted by srmom

http://cbs11tv.com/local/school.bull...2.1601141.html

Here is a case where the boy "manned up" and dealt with it, everyone doing the appropriate thing, talked to his parents, parents talked to administrators, etc. yet the shithead bullies still didn't stop until the kid ended up in the emergency room with a torn rectum from a wedgie.

.

We must be reading two different articles. I see nothing that shows the boy manned up. it appears he was just in the locker room and got a wedgie.

[Ch2tf]

Originally Posted by Prettyface08

Were their names published? Just wondering, because if not, how will they be punished by their reputation or by not getting a job. If it isn't on their records or in their background checks how will people know them from a can of paint?

Yes, some of their names have been published, I believe 6/9 at the very least.

[Prettyface08]

Originally Posted by Ch2tf

Yes, some of their names have been published, I believe 6/9 at the very least.

Ok, then that makes sense. I wasn't sure that they had published names.