to join or not to join?

[teddybear85]

Hi,

as some of you might see my post in the recruiment section, I'm accepted as a member of AEPhi about 2 weeks ago. However, i'm afraid that I'll not be able to pay the dues because they are too expensive for me. and up till now, I don't think i really fit in the house.. maybe i'm too quiet and i'm a boring person... so I don't know if i want to pay that much to join the house.

I mean.. i always wanna join a sorority, but it seems so different and time-consuming to me after i joined. I feel bad when girls asked me to some of the parties and i rejected because I needa study for my midterms... i feel like i'm disappointing them...

anyone can give me some advice?

[AChiOhSnap]

Originally Posted by teddybear85

Hi,

as some of you might see my post in the recruiment section, I'm accepted as a member of AEPhi about 2 weeks ago. However, i'm afraid that I'll not be able to pay the dues because they are too expensive for me. and up till now, I don't think i really fit in the house.. maybe i'm too quiet and i'm a boring person... so I don't know if i want to pay that much to join the house.

I mean.. i always wanna join a sorority, but it seems so different and time-consuming to me after i joined. I feel bad when girls asked me to some of the parties and i rejected because I needa study for my midterms... i feel like i'm disappointing them...

anyone can give me some advice?

Have you talked to your VP New Member Education or your "pledge mom"? She's there to help you. And how do you feel with the other women in your new member class? Have you been making a core group of friends outside of the girls that party?

Just because you're not a partier and you prefer more low-key activities to going out doesn't mean that you won't be a good sorority member. There are women in almost every sorority who prefer staying in to going out and they can usually find their niche. To be perfectly honest with you, I enjoyed being an active collegiate member soooo much more than being a new member. Being a new member IS extremely time consuming, there's no doubt about that. I think you'll find being an active member very different and maybe preferable.

The dues thing I don't have any suggestions for except to maybe talk to your chapter's VP Finance/Treasurer.

Bottom line, I would exhaust all your available resources before deciding to cancel your new member period, but if you can't get past your doubts it's only fair to yourself and the chapter to drop out before your initiation.

ETA: Sorry to crash the board, I didn't realize until after I posted that this was AEPhi specific.

[aephi alum]

Congratulations again on your bid to AEPhi.

Your first semester's dues will always be the most expensive. That would be true no matter what national organization you might join... you have to pay initiation fees, badge fees, etc. that are one-time-only fees.

Talk to your chapter's treasurer about a payment plan. She should be willing to work out a payment plan with you, rather than asking you to cough up the full national and local dues right this moment.

The time commitment will also vary. Your new member period will place some demands upon you, as you will have to attend new member education sessions and other sorority activites. Once you are an active sister, your only flat-out obligations are chapter meetings; however, you may become more involved if your time and interest allows.

Also in regard to your time commitments: education always comes first. We all went to college to learn. If you need to study, you need to study. School comes first.

Feel free to PM me if you have any further questions.

LML,
aephi alum