Help PNM problem

[bwaystar]

We have this PNM that's been coming to our interest meetings on and off
she told us the reason why she's been missing meetings are because she needs extra time studying and she also babysits. I have no problem with PNM who cant come interest meetings because they have work but i found out that this girl is also an interest for another sorority on campus. She always ask me if there is a lot of of work involve because she needs to study (we're going through colonization process)
but the next second she always ask me about frat socials.
I feel that she wants to join A sorority not my sororiy and my sorority is basically split in half

please help!!!

Thanks

[AOII Angel]

Are you NPC or NPHC? If NPC, I'm not sure why you are upset that the PNM may be looking at more than one chapter. That's what NPC does...we let the PNMs see what's out there just like we look at a lot of PNMs before deciding who to bid. Maybe she needs to look at the other group to decide if what you guys have is what she wants or needs. The only reason I'd be concerned is that I'd be afraid she wouldn't be able to participate fully if she can't even make it to meetings before she joins, but that's my opinion!

[bwaystar]

Im not upset that she is looking at other organization, I did that before deciding.
The problem is that she always tells us that she cant come to interest meetings becasue she has to study. We all have to study we're in college and a lot of us also have jobs and other organizations. If she cant come to our interest meetings or other events because she cant study I dont think she'll be able to attend required events.

Originally Posted by bwaystar

Im not upset that she is looking at other organization, I did that before deciding.
The problem is that she always tells us that she cant come to interest meetings becasue she has to study. We all have to study we're in college and a lot of us also have jobs and other organizations. If she cant come to our interest meetings or other events because she cant study I dont think she'll be able to attend required events.

Then don't give her an invitation for membership. Simple as that. If I'm reading correctly, she's pursuing YOU guys, right?

[bwaystar]

well that's exactly the problem! some of my sisters want to extend an invitation because our EC wants us to be competitive you know number games

Originally Posted by bwaystar

well that's exactly the problem! some of my sisters want to extend an invitation because our EC wants us to be competitive you know number games

No I don't know because your posts don't make any sense.

[bwaystar]

we are a colony and there are only 2 national sororites on campus so our EC wants us to be competitive and beat their numbers .so some of my sisters want to extend and invitation to her because according to our EC number wise we need her.

[nittanyalum]

^^^Sounds like the last thing this PNM will do is make your group competitive in any real sense of the word.

Originally Posted by nittanyalum

^^^Sounds like the last thing this PNM will do is make your group competitive in any real sense of the word.

Additionally, it looks like the OP's EC needs to re-think their priorities.

[honeychile]

FWIW, our chapter was split in half about a PNM, and we ended up giving her a bid. WORST MISTAKE WE EVER MADE!!! The half who didn't like her made her life miserable, along with those of the sisters who did like her. That one pledge gave us the largest pledge class that year, but she also succeeded in dividing our chapter beyond repair - before being depledged herself.

Honestly, if that many sisters don't really want her, take a pass and find someone who really, really wants your chapter!

[33girl]

Don't give someone a bid just for the sake of numbers. Especially if you're still a colony - you need hard workers, not just someone who wants to wear letters. Tell your EC in no uncertain terms exactly why this woman is NOT a fit candidate for membership. If they still pressure you to bid her, tell them to go shit in their hat. Seriously.

[MaggieXi]

Are you sure its your EC, or is it the way the colony is interpreting the EC's wishes to take higher numbers?
It does not sound like this PNM can be committed to establishing a colony at this time. Why waste a bid when there are other women that could potentially be hard working for the colony and be able to keep good grades and study. Insted of focusing on this girl, go out and recruit someone better to replace that spot.

[jamezayers]

Quality versus quantity... You need to invite quality girls into your sorority that you like and want to have as your sisters. I remember when we were doing that and having the same problem. If they are not quality they don't tend to take the sorority seriously and it all falls apart.

[Thetagirl218]

I am going to echo everything everyone one else has said. My chapter had problems before because we pledged girls who acted similar to your situation, and it did not turn out well....

[RaggedyAnn]

You are only as strong as your weakest link.

That being said, if she doesn't have time for the colony, keep the communication open and invite her to your first new member recruitment party after you are chartered. If at that time, both parties are interested, you will have a match.