Random: Recruitment

[carnation]

So I'm feeling antsy and starting this thread. Recruitment starts in about 9 weeks. My sixth daughter is rushing at a school where she's a legacy to at least one group and her best friend is in another.

Two things I consider to be myths:

1. You will end up where you're supposed to.

This may happen at some schools but at big (think SEC) schools, deserving people don't- just because of numbers. Fabulous women end up bidless. Women who should have ended up in house A, B, or C end up in X, Y, or Z. A lot. Some end up happy anyway, others don't.

2. Legacies always get a fair shot at their legacy houses.

Recently, the majority of legacies we know have been cut from their legacy house, especially if they were from out of state. Please don't count on a bid from your legacy house; stay open-minded.

Boy, this sounds depressing and I don't mean it to! However, I've watched 5 daughters and dozens of their friends rush since 2000 and hardly anyone ended up where they thought they would. I guess what I want to say is: don't go into recruitment saying that you're definitely going AB or CD.

Who else has a random comment to make?

[dgdramadawg]

carnation, I totally agree with you about #2 and part of #1, but not ALL of it.

I totally agree that there are fabulous women who end up bidless in recruitment, especially at schools like mine... although frequently these bidless women choose to go bidless because they will not give houses that are not "top tier" a try. However, the women who thought they were "supposed" to be in A, B, or C who end up in X, Y, or Z often end up being devoted members of those orgs and can never imagine having gone X, Y, or Z. I can think of multiple girls from my sister's group of friends who went into recruitment hoping to pledge certain houses, got cut, and ended up happy in the houses they pledged, thus "the houses they were supposed to be in."

I guess it all comes down to whether you believe in sorority recruitment predestination or not?

Myth #3: Girls go into recruitment open-minded.

Even if a girl knows nothing about the houses going in, she is going to hear tent/bus/sidewalk talk about the houses. Even if she doesn't pay attention to that, she's still going to be able to figure out, to some extent, which houses fit into which groups. Being open-minded at the start will not stop this from happening, and if things like "old row" and "top tier" matter to a girl, she's going to take note of these things whether or not she has an open mind on day one of round one. It's nice to think that a girl will give every house an even shot, but I cannot name for you one girl from my own rho chi group or from any of my rec-writing experience who gave EVERY house a chance.

[KSUViolet06]

Not anything serious but:

I'm excited to help out with recruitment on the volunteer/advisor side this year.

I'm going to be doing alot with Prep/Refinement Week (dress checks & NPC rules 101). I'm also going to be making "Spirit Bags" for the sisters filled with mints, Tylenol (recruitment is very loud & everyone has a headache at theend of the day), candy, and little inspirational notes to help them feel good and get excited about everything.

Just wanted to share my excitement.

Oh and while I'm thinking about it:

Myth #4: You will be happy if you join a sorority that everyone considers the most popular on campus.

I can't tell you how many girls I know who drop out of sororities that are supposedly the "popular ones" because they aren't happy. Joining a sorority because "it's the one everyone liked during rush" is not smart. You're supposed to make choices based on what you like, not everyone else. If you go back to groups or cut groups based on what other girls like, you could find yourself in a sorority that you don't really like.

[AlphaFrog]

Myth #4 - You should never, ever suicide.

If you get to that place, and you KNOW you will only be happy at ONE of the houses you preffed, and you KNOW in your heart of hearts that you will not be able to even give another house a fair shot, go ahead and suicide. Or, even better, if you have the option (we did), put your #1, and then a house that cut you Round 1, as you obviously won't be on their bid list. That way, you'll still have the option to accept a snap bid, or COR.

[dgdramadawg]

Originally Posted by AlphaFrog

Or, even better, if you have the option (we did), put your #1, and then a house that cut you Round 1, as you obviously won't be on their bid list. That way, you'll still have the option to accept a snap bid, or COR.

This is GENUIS! Was this option discussed with PNMs at your school or was it just not against the rules?

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by dgdramadawg

This is GENUIS! Was this option discussed with PNMs at your school or was it just not against the rules?

When I was filling out my bid card, I put ASA #1, but then the other house I didn't really want, so I asked if I could put somewhere where I got cut round 1, and they said I could. I picked a house I didn't think I'd mind being in, just in case...

[carnation]

Originally Posted by dgdramadawg

carnation, I totally agree with you about #2 and part of #1, but not ALL of it.

I totally agree that there are fabulous women who end up bidless in recruitment, especially at schools like mine... although frequently these bidless women choose to go bidless because they will not give houses that are not "top tier" a try. However, the women who thought they were "supposed" to be in A, B, or C who end up in X, Y, or Z often end up being devoted members of those orgs and can never imagine having gone X, Y, or Z. I can think of multiple girls from my sister's group of friends who went into recruitment hoping to pledge certain houses, got cut, and ended up happy in the houses they pledged, thus "the houses they were supposed to be in."

I guess it all comes down to whether you believe in sorority recruitment predestination or not?

What I see a lot of is that a group of girls from AB High School will go to the same university. Several of their older buddies from AB are in a certain sorority there. They envision that all, say, 5 or 6 of them will pledge together and join their friends. It rarely happens because the sorority isn't likely to pledge 5-6 girls from AB, they have to spread their pledge class out geographically so they can be attractive to PNMs from all over the state. Realistically, 2 or maybe 3 from the same school will make it into the same group.

Or Laurie Legacy from Birmingham wants to pledge her mom's sorority at Bama or Auburn. Guess what? There are 150 other legacies of that group rushing and quota is 50 and mom's group isn't going to take all legacies anyway.

In a perfect world, all sororities would be attractive to all PNMs but it's not gonna happen. Even if a PNM is open to 90% of the groups, she might get left with the other 10% and she might have decent reasons not to pledge those. For sure, there was 1 (out of 14) on my campus I wouldn't have pledged.

Every year, I look forward to recruitment and get all excited while I'm writing recs. But then...I also dread the cuts, especially the giant ones after second parties.

[ChildoftheHorn]

Myth: The prettiest girls are all in the same house.

Ha! I have a friend who is model beautiful. She went through recruitment, and was consistantly ending up in the "model houses" even though they were very low on her pref lists. She ended up dropping herself out because she couldn't really even stand them. She is a very conservative person in every regard and she was ending up in the houses known for partying and lude behavior. It just stuns people when she said that she never wanted to be a so and so. Though, I would say that I put the model houses at the bottom of my list too when I did it my freshman year. You just gotta know what you are looking for in a house...some people are after sisterhood... and other people are looking for a party scene.

She did end up joining a house her sophmore year ( I won't say which).

[MSKKG]

Lots of good points.

This is what I want all PNMs to know: Have enough confidence in yourself to realize YOU could be the one NM to start the pendulum swinging in the other direction if the "best" GLO releases you and you are offered a bid from another GLO. We've all heard that it only takes one or two pledge classes to make or break a GLO and a lot of us have firsthand knowledge of this, whether in our own or another GLO. Whatever GLO you join, put your heart and soul into it. Your enthusiasm will make a difference.

I know someone who joined a smaller GLO while a supposed friend of hers joined a larger one that they both were interested in. They both wanted leadership opportunities, but my friend got them in spades while the other girl was just another face in the crowd. She resented my friend, and they grew apart. My friend is so glad now that she gave her GLO a chance--what opportunities she would have lost by pining away for a GLO that released her instead of joining the one she did!

Yes, I realize there are times when joining a 2nd, 3rd, or more choice is just not going to work out . . . but sometimes it does.

[AlexMack]

Myth: You have to go greek because mom/aunt/grandma wants you to.
You can be perfectly happy at college without going greek. I had just as much fun with my taekwondo club friends as my sisters.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Myth #4: You will be happy if you join a sorority that everyone considers the most popular on campus.

I can't tell you how many girls I know who drop out of sororities that are supposedly the "popular ones" because they aren't happy. Joining a sorority because "it's the one everyone liked during rush" is not smart. You're supposed to make choices based on what you like, not everyone else. If you go back to groups or cut groups based on what other girls like, you could find yourself in a sorority that you don't really like.

Maybe these girls would have been happier if they'd been told ahead of time that if you don't wear the right shoes or carry the proper LV purse then you'll be ostracized, that way they could save up all their money for the right clothes along with the atrociously high dues! These girls have this idea that joining the rich girl group will suddenly make them happy. My opinion on these top tier, old south groups is that they are filled with MRS. seeking, junior leaguers who are more concerned about their future husbands' careers than their own. This may actually be why girls quit...they realized that they want more in life than that! I'd take a bottom tier group filled with ambitious women who want to enrich their own minds and define themselves by their own works not their husbands over a top tier group any day.

[carnation]

Well, one thing that spurred me to start this thread was that today I got an im from a mom--she's not Greek but her older daughter has been a sorority alum for a year--and she said, "Ashley will be going to ___ University and pledging ABC like her sister did." I hope she's not counting 100% on that. I hate, hate, hate seeing girls get hurt in recruitment.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by AOII Angel

Maybe these girls would have been happier if they'd been told ahead of time that if you don't wear the right shoes or carry the proper LV purse then you'll be ostracized, that way they could save up all their money for the right clothes along with the atrociously high dues! These girls have this idea that joining the rich girl group will suddenly make them happy. My opinion on these top tier, old south groups is that they are filled with MRS. seeking, junior leaguers who are more concerned about their future husbands' careers than their own. This may actually be why girls quit...they realized that they want more in life than that! I'd take a bottom tier group filled with ambitious women who want to enrich their own minds and define themselves by their own works not their husbands over a top tier group any day.

To clarify, I was not insulting those chapters who might be the "top tier" groups on their campus. It's great to have alot of girls who want to join. I was just cautioning PNMs against joining groups based on what their friends like.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by MSKKG

We've all heard that it only takes one or two pledge classes to make or break a GLO and a lot of us have firsthand knowledge of this, whether in our own or another GLO. Whatever GLO you join, put your heart and soul into it. Your enthusiasm will make a difference.

I agree. The fall 2006 new member class of my sorority brought our chapter GPA up from # 6 out of 7 groups to #1 out of 7. This year, we were also Most Improved Chapter of the Year. You never know what can happen!

[AOII Angel]

KSUViolet....excuse me for sounding mean....I've just spent an hour reading old posts about Top Tier groups after reading BamaDad's recent thread. I just found one from UT that summed up Top Tier groups in big southern schools very succinctly. (Though the article was written to brag on these groups, it just made them sound shallow and silly.) I'm sure every NPC has a chapter like that out there, but that kind of mentality amazes me! Not to mention, having grown up in the deep south, I'm so sick and tired of reading about these "old families" who are made up of people who have never done anything personally to merit a second look. I'm sure some of these girls are great, but having the right rolex, the right haircut and a daddy who controls a Fortune 500 company does not mean you're going to be worthwhile.
Also, I do know girls who joined top tier groups at LSU. They were told how to dress, sent back to their rooms because they were wearing the wrong color shoes and many other snobby things. That's the truth about top tier....it's not always pretty!