The "coffee date rec"

[AnchorAlumna]

Since we're in a bit of a lull right now, I'd like to bring up for discussion the "coffee date recommendation."
PNM calls up or e-mails sorority alumna out of the blue. Neither know each other. They agree to meet for coffee so they can chat and "alum can get to know PNM."
They chat...PNM hands alum resume...alum writes rec and mails to chapter.

This kind of rec, to me, is a total waste of time.

Recommendations are about character. I can get a list of their extracurriculars. I can get info about their grades.

But...is she selfish and pitch a fit when she doesn't get her way? Is she a party hearty girl? Does she run around with no parental controls? Does she sleep with anything that moves? Does she attend church/synagogue? Is she cruel to or supportive of younger students? Does drama follow her wherever she goes? You're not going to get that from a quick chat, even face to face.

I'd much rather read a rec from an alum who knows the PNM, but that's not always possible. Second choice - an alum who knows the family. Third choice - an alum from the same town who has asked around about the PNM and her family and talked to people who do know them.