What to say/not say to a woman looking at NPHC?

Titchou · #1 07-08-2009, 01:22 PM

The daughter of a friend will be attending college soon. As an African American, she is interested in joining an NPHC group. As an adviser as several campuses, I am somewhat aware of the intake process but not in detail. Is it appropriate of me to inquire of the daughter or her parents "how is it going?" or any other such questions that I'd normally ask of one going thru NPC recruitment? I certainly do not want to act nosy! However, the daughter has remarked on occasion that she is impressed that I've stayed involved since graduation, how it works in NPC, etc. She's a great young lady - very musically gifted (will have a scholarship), athletic and should have no problem graduating from college. I'd love to have her!

So, any advice from my NPHC sisters would be appreciated. I want her to have a great college experience and I know she'll be a great member of whatever group gets her. TIA....

Senusret I · #2 07-08-2009, 01:34 PM

It would depend on a lot of things, including whether she was attending a school at which second semester freshmen were allowed to become members.

In general, I wouldn't assume that any young lady or gentleman would have to do anything the summer before freshman year to prepare for the pursuit of an NPHC organization. (Other than meaningful summer activities like community service)

ETA a scenario:

If I knew a young man who KNEW in his heart wanted to be an Alpha and I was convinced of such -- AND I planned to sponsor him -- AND he was attending a campus at which second semester freshmen could pledge -- AND I knew he was ready --- then, and only then, I might send an email of introduction to the chapter president with a CC to the District Director. THAT'S ONLY ME, though. Not sure if other NPHC people would do that or if their orgs allowed it.

ETA more lol:

In terms of what said young man should do during his first semester in case all of the above were true: keep excellent grades, be active on campus, attend the org's programs, and be a good friend to everyone he meets.

l0v333 · #3 07-08-2009, 05:06 PM

Speaking as someone interested in joining a NPHC sorority, I would like advice on what I should be doing in order to catch the eye of the organization I am interested in. I have good grades but I kind of kept to my self first semester, second semester I attended all programs and was more involved on campus in general. I struggle with the community service aspect not because I have no interest in community service, just in my home town I feel no real sense of community. At school however I plan to mentor at the local high school during the year. However I would like to do more for so any suggestions of that nature would be appreciated. I hope to be chosen for the Fall 09 MIP but I'm not sure how good my chances are, opinions on that would be appreciated as well.

DrPhil · #4 07-08-2009, 05:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by l0v333

Speaking as someone interested in joining a NPHC sorority, I would like advice on what I should be doing in order to catch the eye of the organization I am interested in. I have good grades but I kind of kept to my self first semester, second semester I attended all programs and was more involved on campus in general. I struggle with the community service aspect not because I have no interest in community service, just in my home town I feel no real sense of community. At school however I plan to mentor at the local high school during the year. However I would like to do more for so any suggestions of that nature would be appreciated. I hope to be chosen for the Fall 09 MIP but I'm not sure how good my chances are, opinions on that would be appreciated as well.

Talk to the members.

Little32 · #5 07-08-2009, 05:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Titchou

T Is it appropriate of me to inquire of the daughter or her parents "how is it going?" or any other such questions that I'd normally ask of one going thru NPC recruitment? ...

As Sen said, this more than likely would not be an issue for another year to 18 months. Also, I would wait until she announces her membership before I start to ask questions. NPHC folk *generally* embrace the idea of discretion when it comes to MIP. So I would not ask her about anything unless she volunteers information first. But that's just me.

l0v333 · #6 07-08-2009, 07:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Talk to the members.

but if i say something wrong are my chances shot to hell, && wat is the wrong thing to say. i just really really want this i dont want to mess it up...

DrPhil · #7 07-08-2009, 08:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by l0v333

but if i say something wrong are my chances shot to hell, && wat is the wrong thing to say. i just really really want this i dont want to mess it up...

Be yourself.

You can figure the rest out.

You mentioned not really doing community service yet. There's no excuse. Make sure that you're doing service for service's sake and not to build your resume` or get into this sorority. Service must be genuine. Some chapters aren't sticklers for this but I've always been. One of my pet peeves is women who did not do service until college, especially women who wait until the year or semester they plan on attending a sorority's programs. You want to be Fall 2009 (how do you know there may be a line?) but your service won't begin until the Fall. Hmmmmm.....

I'll keep the rest to myself. Only the opinion of the women in the chapter matters, anyway.

DrPhil · #8 07-08-2009, 08:01 PM

oh goodness...I'm the reason aspirants keep coming here with questions. I blame Michael Jackson.

Senusret I · #9 07-08-2009, 08:05 PM

Ha!

l0v333 · #10 07-08-2009, 08:33 PM

No I completely understand how not doing community service until might paint the picture that I’m only doing it for the sake of going Greek. Honestly it’s partly that I’m not going to lie about that, but I’ve also only recently become interested in giving back, this was in my senior year of high school. I’m not going to go into a whole big story of why or what spurred the change, I will say that the change as suspiciously as is sounds, happens to coincide with my discovery of the Greek community. That being said, if Greek life has played apart in my becoming a person who is more considerate, caring, && interested in helping people make it through hard times similar and different from my own, is it a bad thing? No ones perfect and I haven’t been an angel all my life, what’s important is that I’ve learned from my mistakes and changed for the better, I think. I know that I want to give back regardless of whether or not my sorority of interest takes me && I already have && I will continue to. I’m just worried that what I’ve done so far won’t be enough because at the end of the day it’s not about what you SAY you’re GOING to do, it’s about what you have already done. As far as knowing there is a line I don’t know, only whispers in the wind. The members have only said to keep your eyes and ears open && that’s what I plan to do, if the opportunity should arise I would like to take it so long as nerves don’t stand in the way.

Titchou · #11 07-08-2009, 09:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Little32

As Sen said, this more than likely would not be an issue for another year to 18 months. Also, I would wait until she announces her membership before I start to ask questions. NPHC folk *generally* embrace the idea of discretion when it comes to MIP. So I would not ask her about anything unless she volunteers information first. But that's just me.

Thanks. This is exactly what I wanted to know. I am very aware of the discretion issue with NPHC and that's why I asked. I'm assuming she'll be looked at by both groups on her campus as her father is a very active Alpha and she's such a top young lady. I'm excited for her but did not want to intrude. Thanks again!

DrPhil · #12 07-08-2009, 09:29 PM

If you have been privy to whispers and MEMBERS have said to keep your eyes and ears open...why are you here? LOL

UGAalum94 · #13 07-08-2009, 09:33 PM

What's MIP? Membership Interest Program?

l0v333 · #14 07-08-2009, 09:33 PM

To learn as much as I can. To get advice about the things I'm not sure of && answers to the questions that others are capable and willing to answer. && to help other PNM's with the knowledge I already have if I can So if your not going to help with that you should probably just stop responding to me, because I'm not going to stop searching for information.

l0v333 · #15 07-08-2009, 09:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UGAalum94

What's MIP? Membership Interest Program?

its actually stands for Membership Intake Process. I was just informed that it is solely and NPHC term so if you are interested in NPC it doesn't actually apply or mean anything for you