Formal Recruitment Dinner?

[PennState-Gamma]

Our alumni recently encouraged us to have a formal dinner (dry) during our rush. The plan is to have a sorority over for a meal, dress up, mix with them, and show our rushes a little more about the house, etc.

we're all set to have one, have the date, have the food planned, have the sorority, but what else do we need?

sorority women- what activities would you expect during a formal recruitment dinner? Besides the meal, what fills the before and after time?

Fraternity men- have you done anything like this before/what did you do? what would you say?

[Kansas City]

Since this is a recruitment event, you should probably focus on conversation. Maybe try some group games (charades, Pictionary, etc.) that will get everyone involved.

[ASTalumna06]

Group games are always a good idea. And if you need to break everyone down into smaller groups, make sure the groups are diverse. Example: maybe you could have one brother, one of your PNMs, and two sisters on each team.

Another good idea for the future (if your campus has them) is to put on an etiquette dinner. At my school, the students who worked in catering would put them on and it was interesting, entertaining, and we had a great meal.

And maybe after the meal the active brothers and sisters could talk about Greek life. Each person could talk about their reason for joining, things they found out after they joined that they didn't expect, and their favorite memory? And the PNMs could all say something about why they're there, and maybe ask one question each?

Hope that helps!

[Psi U MC Vito]

My chapter always does a formal dinner for recruitment. We usually do it right before bids are given out. Basically it is to show what the brotherhood is all about. You just sit with the kids and talk to them. Ask them questions about themselves, encourage them to ask questions of you and the organization, just BS. just bond with them. Another thing one of my other chapters does is have everybody give a little speech at some point in the night. It's a simple thing, just saying your name and a couple of facts about yourself.

[33girl]

OK, I'm going to sound like a guy here, but here goes.

Don't do this with the hottest sorority on campus. The rushees will focus on the girls and try to get their phone numbers and pay no attention to you or the idea of pledging.

Obviously don't ask the sorority that's the lowest on the totem pole either, but you do want to keep the guys focused on what they're really there for.

[gtdxeric]

Originally Posted by 33girl

OK, I'm going to sound like a guy here, but here goes.

Don't do this with the hottest sorority on campus. The rushees will focus on the girls and try to get their phone numbers and pay no attention to you or the idea of pledging.

I disagree; I doubt the distraction would be much different going from medium-hot to extremely hot girls. It would be there, yes, but the guys who are going to stay focused will stay focused and the guys who will hit on girls will hit on girls, regardless of whether the girls are 7's or 8's and 9's.

With that said, I think the first priority when picking a sorority for something like this is to find one with girls who are familiar with your fraternity. A medium-hot girl saying that she really likes XYZ is a much better selling point than a really hot girl saying that um yeah, she doesn't actually hang out there, but she's heard they're really nice guys.

[Canadian]

Um,

We're holding a Rush BBQ which is slightly less formal. We have burgers and franks, then the Brothers make speeches about what they've done in Kappa Sig. I like to talk about how I probably would never have graduated if it wasn't for the fraternity. Others talk about the unique friends they've made or the real world growth. Lots of people pledge Kappa Sigma thinking it's like Animal House, and other people get some really strange ideas about the spiritual angle.

Our formal dinners usually come a few days after Rush when we've got a fiscal committment. Otherwise we're paying for meals for people who may not actually care enough to put down a 45 dollar payment on pledging.

Thomas

[33girl]

Originally Posted by gtdxeric

With that said, I think the first priority when picking a sorority for something like this is to find one with girls who are familiar with your fraternity. A medium-hot girl saying that she really likes XYZ is a much better selling point than a really hot girl saying that um yeah, she doesn't actually hang out there, but she's heard they're really nice guys.

Yeah, the bolded is more what I meant. You don't want anyone to think you're pulling a Can't Buy Me Love or something.

[CrackerBarrel]

Is there any chance that the sorority you're having dinner with has an alum who was a former sweetheart of your house or something? If you're doing it as a formal dinner it seems to me that it should be followed by speeches, not games or something. If there is a couple where the husband is an alum of your house and the wife is an alum of the sorority that would seem appropriate and they would probably have some good stories to share or something.

We do formal dinners with speeches for rush, but never with a sorority. And games just seem out of place after a formal dinner to me.

[magichat]

Is there a way to avoid the dry factor?

[Senusret I]

Originally Posted by CrackerBarrel

Is there any chance that the sorority you're having dinner with has an alum who was a former sweetheart of your house or something? If you're doing it as a formal dinner it seems to me that it should be followed by speeches, not games or something. If there is a couple where the husband is an alum of your house and the wife is an alum of the sorority that would seem appropriate and they would probably have some good stories to share or something.

We do formal dinners with speeches for rush, but never with a sorority. And games just seem out of place after a formal dinner to me.

I agree with this.

Although it has fallen out of practice, Alpha used to do this a hundred years ago, and it always had a bit of a formal program to it. No more than five speakers -- and three will probably do: President, Pledgemaster, and Alumni President (or other notable alum).

[Elephant Walk]

Originally Posted by Senusret I

I agree with this.

Although it has fallen out of practice, Alpha used to do this a hundred years ago, and it always had a bit of a formal program to it. No more than five speakers -- and three will probably do: President, Pledgemaster, and Alumni President (or other notable alum).

Yep.

And as I said in another thread, having an alumni talk about a sad moment in his life where his brothers got him through some tough times is an excellent way to go about the speech. i.e. they all showed up at his dad's funeral and so on.

[LaneSig]

Originally Posted by CrackerBarrel

We do formal dinners with speeches for rush, but never with a sorority. And games just seem out of place after a formal dinner to me.

Agree. We always had girls who were girlfriends of brothers or hung out with our chapter. By inviting one single sorority, hot or medium, you will never find one where all of the members are into your fraternity. You run the risk of a few sorority members whispering into the ears of pnms about the fraternity they really hang out with.

[VandalSquirrel]

Originally Posted by LaneSig

Agree. We always had girls who were girlfriends of brothers or hung out with our chapter. By inviting one single sorority, hot or medium, you will never find one where all of the members are into your fraternity. You run the risk of a few sorority members whispering into the ears of pnms about the fraternity they really hang out with.

If you get women you already know as dates, there also won't be a chance of men spending time getting to know them or impress them that they should be spending on getting to know each other for rush purposes. You really want to get women who can talk you up and be genuine and informed.

Having women at Rush is so foreign to me. At my school the only women at Rush are house moms or wives of advisors and alumni, or a the mother of a member.

[TSteven]

Originally Posted by CrackerBarrel

We do formal dinners with speeches for rush, but never with a sorority. And games just seem out of place after a formal dinner to me.

Co-sign.

Originally Posted by Senusret I

President, Pledgemaster, and Alumni President (or other notable alum).

I would include the Rush Chair. Or if you wanted to keep the number of speakers down to just three, then perhaps replace the Pledgemaster with the Rush Chair.

Originally Posted by LaneSig

Agree. We always had girls who were girlfriends of brothers or hung out with our chapter. By inviting one single sorority, hot or medium, you will never find one where all of the members are into your fraternity. You run the risk of a few sorority members whispering into the ears of pnms about the fraternity they really hang out with.

I agree. However, when it comes to a formal dinner rush event (usually an invite event only), I feel it should only be the brothers (actives and notable alumni as Senusret I noted), and of course the House Mother, in attendance.

Originally Posted by VandalSquirrel

Having women at Rush is so foreign to me. At my school the only women at Rush are house moms or wives of advisors and alumni, or a the mother of a member.

Often, the above mention ladies would be there as well. But in addition to them, on many campuses - Kentucky (UK) being one of them - a different sorority chapter would be invited to attend one of the rush parties. The exception being an "invite only" (i.e. formal dinner) event.