Cut because you're "too good"?

FuzzieAlum · #1 07-09-2007, 11:30 PM

I'm seeing it in some current rush threads, but I've seen it before elsewhere too ... PNMs saying that a chapter dismissed them mentally or cut them because the chapter assumed they were "too good" (too popular, too sought after, too something) to be interested in them.

I'm not sure I believe this really happens, although I can see why a PNM would prefer to believe this over simply not being attractive to a chapter. I don't recall my sisters ever saying, "We're not going to go after Susie, because she's obviously too good for us." And honestly, we were a chapter that didn't have the highest return rate on campus, so we *could* have thought that way.

Chapters really aren't all looking for the same thing, once you get beyond minimum grades, good hygiene, the real basics. One chapter may go for cheerleaders but others may think it's a dumb sport & girls who do it are superficial. One chapter was want stellar grades but another may think 4.0s are boring nerds. You see people arguing all the time about what is good style; some people think Paris Hilton is hot and others honestly believe her style is overdone.

I guess I'm wondering, have any of you actually experienced "We're not going after Susie because she's definitely top chapter material and won't like us" - from the sorority end, not as a PNM? Is this just a comforting rushee myth or does it really happen?

DeltaBetaBaby · #2 07-09-2007, 11:37 PM

No. We would occasionally say, "oh, Suzie is the little sister of Annie, the President of XYZ, and Jake, the XYZ sweetheart, she is probably going to go XYZ", maybe we shouldn't waste an invite.

But we were never just like "oh, Suzie is too popular for us."

sageofages · #3 07-09-2007, 11:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

No. We would occasionally say, "oh, Suzie is the little sister of Annie, the President of XYZ, and Jake, the XYZ sweetheart, she is probably going to go XYZ", maybe we shouldn't waste an invite.

But we were never just like "oh, Suzie is too popular for us."

With the new recruitment return rules, this sort of discussion was very much evident in a couple of the selection sessions I assisted. Each invitation was critical, and to use it on a PNM who was so apparently interested in another group, and not invite a really interesting PNM was a source of great angst.

KSUViolet06 · #4 07-10-2007, 12:22 AM

I agree with the whole release figures thing. When it gets down to figuring out who gets invited back, chapters are inclined to go with the PNMs that they feel will most likely accept an invite. When you know that someone is interested in another group, why bother?

Hence why we caution PNMs so much about not being too openly opinionated about chapters (i.e. posting on their Facebook "I want Theta or nothing!") because that can lead other chapters to not want to be bothered with wasting invites on them.

violetpretty · #5 07-10-2007, 12:36 AM

There is a difference between being intimidated by a PNM who is gorgeous, outgoing, accomplished etc. and talking to a PNM who ACTS snooty like she is too good for your chapter. I doubt the former would get cut, but probably the latter would get cut.

susan314 · #6 07-10-2007, 12:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by violetpretty

There is a difference between being intimidated by a PNM who is gorgeous, outgoing, accomplished etc. and talking to a PNM who ACTS snooty like she is too good for your chapter. I doubt the former would get cut, but probably the latter would get cut.

Agreed.

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlphaGamUGAAlum

But as you move down the return rate spectrum, the groups get to invite more PNMs back, so while the top groups might rule out a disinterested girl, I agree with the OP that it's rarely going to happen because a girl is "too good" for a group. If the group thinks she's a good girl, if she were interested, they would keep her.

Agree with this too.

We didn't typically have to make a whole lot of cuts in my chapter...once we released PNMs who didn't meet our grade cutoff or other specific restrictions like that, we came close to where we had to be release figures wise. So, there was no real reason to drop a girl only because she seemed "too good"

for our chapter (whatever that's supposed to mean), but a girl with a horrible, rude attitude...that would be a different story.

But a girl who got cut for that reason wouldn't be getting cut b/c she was "too good" - she'd be getting cut b/c she was a bitch.

AlphaFrog · #7 07-10-2007, 07:14 AM

This thread is one big "Intimidated by my hotness" joke waiting to happen.

TrueBlueKappa · #8 07-10-2007, 07:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlphaFrog

This thread is one big "Intimidated by my hotness" joke waiting to happen.

I was totally waiting for that...

FuzzieAlum · #9 07-10-2007, 08:46 AM

I would distinguish between a PNM who flat out says, "I only want X and feel like I am wasting my time at your party" (or who makes it evident without words) and one who we assume would prefer a top tier or core four or whatever sorority. I don't think many chapters would waste their time on the first girl. We have dignity, and who wants someone rude anyway? (It's funny, the PNMs with that attitude so often end up suiciding and going bidless.)

MaggieXi · #10 07-10-2007, 08:47 AM

If we had PNMs come in acting better than everyone else, acting disinterested, or stating that they would be joining "XYZ" chapter (and yes that did happen!) they may have not been invited back to the following round because there are so many girls who are interested, being themselves and giving all the chapters a chance -- why waste an invite on someone who clearly doesn't want to be there?

susan314 · #11 07-10-2007, 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MaggieXi

If we had PNMs come in acting better than everyone else, acting disinterested, or stating that they would be joining "XYZ" chapter (and yes that did happen!) they may have not been invited back to the following round because there are so many girls who are interested, being themselves and giving all the chapters a chance -- why waste an invite on someone who clearly doesn't want to be there?

Very true...but it still goes back to the fact that she's being released b/c of her attitude/actions, not because the group actually thought she was "too good for them."

There may be girls who you suspect might go to certain chapters just based on a gut feeling, but are still generally pleasant throughout rush. Unless you're being pressured to make big cuts b/c of release figures, you're not likely to get rid of them just because they "look like" they'd go ABC or XYZ.

Tom Earp · #12 07-10-2007, 05:28 PM

So, basically if they do not fit, then they do not!

So, we as GLOs are Bad?

SWTXBelle · #13 07-10-2007, 06:07 PM

All this time I thought I had been cut from a few sororities because I was a sophomore - but no! I was too good! They were . . . (everybody say it) INTIMIDATED BY MY HOTNESS.

sageofages · #14 07-10-2007, 06:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

All this time I thought I had been cut from a few sororities because I was a sophomore - but no! I was too good! They were . . . (everybody say it) INTIMIDATED BY MY HOTNESS.

PHTTTTTTTTTTTTT....

Darn, now I gotta wipe off my monitor....

OtterXO · #15 07-10-2007, 07:14 PM

The only reason I could think is the legacy situation. If a girl is an in-house legacy to a chapter we would probably assume she'd want the chapter that her sister is in. However, I remember one girl who was a quadruple legacy to another chapter on campus and her older sister had just graduated the year prior....and she pledged Chi-O. So I would be hesitant to judge someone based on that unless they said "just so you know, my sister is in XYZ". But then she wouldn't be cut for being a legacy....she'd, again, be cut for being a bitch.