Help please :(

[AphiCutie]

Ok, basically i don't know what to do, i am so ready to drop and i've even told a few of my sisters in the chapter that i basically did drop. i haven't been to anything really and tonight is court of ivy and i just can't go. i love alpha phi so much and what it stands for, and i think it's an awesome opportunity to meet girls all over the US, but my chapter is horrible. our exec. board dictates to us how we have to act and what we have to wear and basically tells us who to be. even though their time is almost up, i just can't see the chapter getting any better within hte next 2 years that i'm here (i'm a junior). also, i have to pay for dues myself, and they are really killing me as i have to pay for everything in my apt, cell phone, and car payments. i just don't know what to do, i can't drop it because it really does mean alot to me yet the people and hte money issue make me want to. i want to be able to become inactive or even see if i can be an alum but i don't know if that's possible. Please send your advice!!! I know that it sounds like I might as well just drop as i've been feeling htis way for about a year but it's just real hard because I don't want to throw alpha phi out for the rest of my life. maybe someone knows something i can do that nationals will allow. thank you all so much for listening and please send me your advice!

aoe