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Sister is considering deactivating
My sorority little sister is considering deactivating and I'm not exactly sure what to do. Our chapter is only a few months old, so our sisterhood is still developing. Because of this, my little feels like she is having a hard time making friends. I understand where she's coming from, but I don't know how to encourage her to stay. As someone who had a tough time making "best" friends myself, I know that genuine relationships take time and effort to cultivate. It goes without saying that a colony will not have a strong sister bonds overnight.
I am admittedly frustrated. I think a lot of the chapter's younger members, my little included, want instant gratification. I want to tell my little to ride it out, but there has been no serious effort on her part to improve her situation. I want to give her tough love, but my past honesty and transparency has negatively affected our friendship. I don't know how to communicate with her. No matter how sweet and tender I try to be, she somehow finds a way to turn me into Cruella de Vil.
There seems to be an insurmountable gap in our maturity levels and life experience. Anytime I give her sound advice, if it isn't what she wants to hear, she gets unnecessarily combative and defensive. I always have to be overly conscious of what I say as not to upset her. I would love for us to have the same relationship that my big and I have. I truly feel protective of my little and I want to maximize her sorority experience. If I care too much, she thinks I'm condescending. If I back off, she tells me I don't care at all. I can't win with her. Despite all of the above, I would miss her if she deactivated. Tough love may not be what my little needs right now, but I don't know how to baby a young adult, either.
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