guys...how long would you wait?

bgsugirlie · #1 02-13-2002, 10:53 AM

I had the most interesting conversation with the guys at work yesterday about relationships and sex. I just wanted to see if the guys on GC felt the same way.
If your girlfriend was all about taking things slow, how long would you wait until she was ready to do the deed?

Kevlar281 · #2 02-13-2002, 11:26 AM

If I were serious about her then I would wait as long as it takes.

h2oot · #3 02-13-2002, 12:57 PM

Good answer, Kelvar.

Nothing would turn me off more than a guy who gives an "ultimatum" or tries to make you feel guilty, etc. If a guy/girl doesn't care enough to go at whatever pace is comfortable for BOTH of them, then bye-bye dude.

valkyrie · #4 02-13-2002, 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by h2oot
Good answer, Kelvar.

Nothing would turn me off more than a guy who gives an "ultimatum" or tries to make you feel guilty, etc. If a guy/girl doesn't care enough to go at whatever pace is comfortable for BOTH of them, then bye-bye dude.

Hey, to play devil's advocate for a second -- don't women tend to do the same thing with marriage -- by giving an ultimatum or using guilt to try to get a guy to propose? Just a thought...I think we *all* play games in relationships, whether we are male or female.

James · #5 02-13-2002, 01:11 PM

Well in fairness, its not always a matter of whether you are just serious or not. A lot of the emotional bond happens from unconscious reactions to things in the relationship.

So yes I think a lot of guys would stay, without sex, if they were really into the girl. The question is how much it might start bothering them over time and how that would effect the way they feel. Sexual frustration is pretty powerful.

Other things that might effect the relationship are whether she is a virgin or not?

It would be easier to handle waiting a while for a virgin vs. non-virgin.

How much sexual contact is there? If there is heavy petting but never any release . . .

You could date a "technical virgin" for almost forever without much grief.

As far as how long I would wait, I would wait up until the point that I woke up and realized I didn't like her that much anymore.

The1calledTKE · #6 02-13-2002, 01:53 PM

I would wait. If you love her there should be no problem.

volgirl2376 · #7 02-13-2002, 02:26 PM

i have a problem with waiting - i guess i am just brimming with lust lol

skip101 · #8 02-13-2002, 02:32 PM

I dont really have a set time limit.

Q for the women???
How long do you think we should wait?

PKTSU01 · #9 02-13-2002, 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by volgirl2376
i have a problem with waiting - i guess i am just brimming with lust lol

Jeez Sarah, I had no idea you were so aggressively perverted.

valkyrie · #10 02-13-2002, 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by skip101
Q for the women???
How long do you think we should wait?

About two hours.

I'm kidding (kind of) but I've never seen the point of waiting. Waiting for what?

volgirl2376 · #11 02-13-2002, 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by skip101
Q for the women???
How long do you think we should wait?

I try to at least not do it on the first date - guys usually dont call back - but again, Im to the point in my life, where I can do it just for my own enjoyment.

Quote:

Originally posted by PKTSU01

Jeez Sarah, I had no idea you were so aggressively perverted.

Hehehe, yeah I guess I am

h2oot · #12 02-13-2002, 02:49 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by valkyrie

Hey, to play devil's advocate for a second -- don't women tend to do the same thing with marriage -- by giving an ultimatum or using guilt to try to get a guy to propose? Just a thought...I think we *all* play games in relationships, whether we are male or female.

I don't believe that Marriage is playing a game. If a girl is in a long term relationship and wonders where the relationship is going, then that's a bit different from some dude saying he thinks its time to get it on.

James · #13 02-13-2002, 02:55 PM

I would also say that the relationship really doesn't start until you start having sexual intercourse.

Before that a lot f the relationship is shaped because you arent having sex. After that point people seem to let their hair down a bit. Especially guys. We become different . . . evil . . . cold . . . sinister . . lol j/k.

h2oot · #14 02-13-2002, 02:57 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by skip101
I dont really have a set time limit.

Q for the women???
How long do you think we should wait?

I need to be in a relationship and in love. This is not just a moral issue, its emotional as well.

KSig RC · #15 02-13-2002, 03:56 PM

It would depend on the reason . . . if it's something that I feel to be bullshit, then the relationship's probably not going to go anywhere anyway - if it's something personally "valid" for the girl, well then I'd go with it as long as I felt it was still beneficial to me and to her to be in the relationship, aka until I felt like it wasn't working out. That could be a week, could be forever . . .