Re-rushing as a sophomore? (please read below)

[soccergirl]

I attend a big state school with a highly competitive rush. I am an in house legacy for one of the bigger sororities here (my sister was in it about 10 years ago), but I had a really bad rush my freshman year. I have a high gpa, am involved in a spirit group on campus, volunteer regularly, and have a few good friends in other sororities, with a few friendly acquaintances in my legacy. My first rush I was cross-cut from the other sororities that I really took a liking too, and then I was cut from my legacy after the third day (they told my sister that it was an accident due to other sororities with bigger quotas putting me high on their list). I love all the organizations I am in now, but I really want to be a part of greek life, have the sisterhood, and to have that legacy to pass on (no matter what house).

Is this a bad idea? I probably wouldn't be as emotionally involved or as set on one house as before. (Last year, I also happened to put my legacy on all of my resumes that got sent out to each house-probably not a good idea).

Also, sorry if the wording is confusing.

Thanks!

[clemsongirl]

Originally Posted by soccergirl

I attend a big state school with a highly competitive rush. I am an in house legacy for one of the bigger sororities here (my sister was in it about 10 years ago), but I had a really bad rush my freshman year. I have a high gpa, am involved in a spirit group on campus, volunteer regularly, and have a few good friends in other sororities, with a few friendly acquaintances in my legacy. My first rush I was cross-cut from the other sororities that I really took a liking too, and then I was cut from my legacy after the third day (they told my sister that it was an accident due to other sororities with bigger quotas putting me high on their list). I love all the organizations I am in now, but I really want to be a part of greek life, have the sisterhood, and to have that legacy to pass on (no matter what house).

Is this a bad idea? I probably wouldn't be as emotionally involved or as set on one house as before. (Last year, I also happened to put my legacy on all of my resumes that got sent out to each house-probably not a good idea).

Also, sorry if the wording is confusing.

Thanks!

QFP

[FSUZeta]

I have no idea where you go to school or which sorority you are a legacy to (AND DO NOT TELL ME!), so this is mere speculation. You might have been cut by the other sororities due to the strength of your legacy chapter. In other words, they were afraid to take a chance on you because for some reason they thought that you were most interested in your legacy house. (of course, it could be for an entirely different reason too). Did you give off a "it's ABC or nothing for me?" vibe? Did you tell the other sororities that you were keeping your options open and making your own decision based on where you felt you would fit in best?


It sounds to me like you have kept yourself in the game for next year's rush by keeping your grades up, joining a campus org., volunteering, and making friends. Get your recommendations for next formal rush in order and go for it. We don't know what your chances will be that you receive a bid, but you won't get a bid if you don't try again.

[33girl]

Were you entirely cut from all sororities or did you drop out of rush voluntarily?

Also, there was no "accident. " The legacy chapter simply didn't rank you high enough to insure your inclusion in parties. Blaming it on RFM and other sororities is NOT cool.

[amIblue?]

Just make sure your friends who are in other sororities know that you are open to chapters other than your legacy chapter.

[soccergirl]

Originally Posted by FSUZeta

I have no idea where you go to school or which sorority you are a legacy to (AND DO NOT TELL ME!), so this is mere speculation. You might have been cut by the other sororities due to the strength of your legacy chapter. In other words, they were afraid to take a chance on you because for some reason they thought that you were most interested in your legacy house. (of course, it could be for an entirely different reason too). Did you give off a "it's ABC or nothing for me?" vibe? Did you tell the other sororities that you were keeping your options open and making your own decision based on where you felt you would fit in best?


It sounds to me like you have kept yourself in the game for next year's rush by keeping your grades up, joining a campus org., volunteering, and making friends. Get your recommendations for next formal rush in order and go for it. We don't know what your chances will be that you receive a bid, but you won't get a bid if you don't try again.

I did try to communicate that I was keeping my options open, but I did have the mindset of being dedicated to my legacy. I think I will try for next year, thank you so much!!

[soccergirl]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Were you entirely cut from all sororities or did you drop out of rush voluntarily?

Also, there was no "accident. " The legacy chapter simply didn't rank you high enough to insure your inclusion in parties. Blaming it on RFM and other sororities is NOT cool.

I do not blame RFM or other sororities personally for my being cut, but I was just reiterating what people within my legacy told my sister when she and her sorority sisters questioned why I was cut early.

Also, I ended up going up until pref night to view the other sororities and realized that I truly did not feel like I fit in at the ones I had left and decided to drop before bid day.

[soccergirl]

Originally Posted by amIblue?

Just make sure your friends who are in other sororities know that you are open to chapters other than your legacy chapter.

Absolutely noted, thank you!

[thetalady]

Originally Posted by soccergirl

I do not blame RFM or other sororities personally for my being cut, but I was just reiterating what people within my legacy told my sister when she and her sorority sisters questioned why I was cut early.

Also, I ended up going up until pref night to view the other sororities and realized that I truly did not feel like I fit in at the ones I had left and decided to drop before bid day.

Sweetie, what you and maybe your sister were told was a white lie to save you from embarrassment. Legacies are not dropped by accident. Cross cutting is not real under RFM.

Dropping out of rush while you the opportunity to join a sorority that WANTED YOU will not get you much sympathy here. And that is also going to have an impact on you if you choose to rush again. Expect to be dropped quickly by those sororities that you turned your back on this year.

Please don't misunderstand... if you would not have accepted a bid from those chapters that you had pref invites to, then that was the right thing to do, IMHO.

The thing you have to understand, hopefully with maturity, is that YOU might have rejected your chance at sorority membership.

[pinksequins]

There were three groups at pref. All three were unacceptable?

[Cheerio]

Originally Posted by soccergirl

I attend a big state school with a highly competitive rush. I am an in house legacy for one of the bigger sororities here (my sister was in it about 10 years ago)...I love all the organizations I am in now, but I really want to be a part of greek life, have the sisterhood, and to have that legacy to pass on (no matter what house).

Is this a bad idea? Thanks!

Originally Posted by FSUZeta

It sounds to me like you have kept yourself in the game for next year's rush by keeping your grades up, joining a campus org., volunteering, and making friends. Get your recommendations for next formal rush in order and go for it. We don't know what your chances will be that you receive a bid, but you won't get a bid if you don't try again.

Originally Posted by soccergirl

Also, I ended up going up until pref night to view the other sororities and realized that I truly did not feel like I fit in at the ones I had left and decided to drop before bid day.

I am glad you are giving recruitment another shot. You have been reminded here to prepare well, but maybe expect a bit more disappointment. I hope you will wisely attend all your Pref parties this Fall.

Make a note to let us here on Greekchat know (after rush is over!) how you fared in your second go-around.

[33girl]

I meant that it wasn't cool for the sorority to tell your sister that. As a member she should have been given the courtesy of an honest response, not a "blame the system" copout.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by 33girl

I meant that it wasn't cool for the sorority to tell your sister that. As a member she should have been given the courtesy of an honest response, not a "blame the system" copout.

That may not be true in all groups. In my organization, no explanation should be given because what happens in bid session is ritual and a secret of the people present. Divulging to the legacy's family member what happened would be the same as telling the PNM as you see from all of the messages on GC about PNMs cut from their legacies with wild stories of the reasons. A member of any group should know going in that their legacy is not a lock for membership. Membership selection is the responsibility of the collegiate members of that individual chapter. Accepting that the PNM was not a fit for the chapter is the best coarse of action since any demands for answers ALWAYS ends in hurt feelings whether the reasons are white washed or not.

[soccergirl]

Originally Posted by thetalady

Sweetie, what you and maybe your sister were told was a white lie to save you from embarrassment. Legacies are not dropped by accident. Cross cutting is not real under RFM.

Dropping out of rush while you the opportunity to join a sorority that WANTED YOU will not get you much sympathy here. And that is also going to have an impact on you if you choose to rush again. Expect to be dropped quickly by those sororities that you turned your back on this year.

Please don't misunderstand... if you would not have accepted a bid from those chapters that you had pref invites to, then that was the right thing to do, IMHO.

The thing you have to understand, hopefully with maturity, is that YOU might have rejected your chance at sorority membership.

I truly am not looking for sympathy, I am just trying to get some honest feedback to help me make my decision for the coming year. That is what I have been given so far and I really am so thankful for all of it.

I definitely agree with you and understand the consequences of my actions last year. I do not regret dropping after pref night, however, because I know that it gave me time to set my roots elsewhere at my university and ponder more on greek life and what it means to me. I will go into sorority recruitment next year knowing that I may not have the best chances, but I know that this is the best option for me and I will be prepared for whatever happens.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and respond, though!

[soccergirl]

Originally Posted by Cheerio

I am glad you are giving recruitment another shot. You have been reminded here to prepare well, but maybe expect a bit more disappointment. I hope you will wisely attend all your Pref parties this Fall.

Make a note to let us here on Greekchat know (after rush is over!) how you fared in your second go-around.

Yes, I will give it another shot, any chance is better than none! I will try my best to remember to keep an update!