Should I still join a sorority if I am socially awkward?

I will be rushing soon as a junior. I am a bit shy and introverted unless i get to know somebody one on one very well then I am my outgoing self. I have a hard time making conversations last even when I really want them too. I also feel like i don't fit in and that makes me think I won't get any bids. I am friendly and I do love people, I sometimes just get very anxious and nervous around them.

How can I work on this before I rush?

[KDCat]

You need to practice having conversations with strangers. You need to learn to sustain a conversation. I'm a natural introvert, but I learned to do it. You can, too. Just practice starting conversations in the line at the grocery store or on the bus or in elevators or with co-workers you don't know well. You will improve with practice.

Look for a book about interviewing skills. Most of the preparation tips will be useful for you.
http://money.usnews.com/money/career...interview-prep

Practice active listening skills.
http://sales.about.com/od/wheretosta...-Listening.htm


Here are some suggestions for recruitment:

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...t=conversation

http://sororityrush.webs.com/preparationii.htm

http://www.suresister.com/sororityre...-conversations

[AnchorAlumna]

Read "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie. It's an old book and if you're shy, it will change your life.
You can probably find one cheap at a used bookstore.

[barbino]

Here's an idea similar to the "immersion method" of learning languages. Before going through recruitment, deliberately put yourself in several social situations where you will have many people around you. If you want, the first time you don't have to talk or interact much. Just being there will help you get used to being around others. Then the next few times gradually increase your level of talking/being with the others around you. You can go to concerts, museums, restaurants, anywhere there will be a large amount of people. A new church is a good place because everyone there will want to greet and meet you, like in recruitment.

Sororities have many introverted members. Keep in mind that not everyone is an extrovert. You'll do just fine, especially if you consciously try to overcome your shyness instead of just trying to deal with it. Good luck.

[excelblue]

It's basically a chicken and egg problem:

* Being in a sorority may help improve your social skills and act more gracefully.
* Your social skills may get you into a sorority.

Introverts still enjoy friendship and meaningful interactions; they just prefer to have a limited amount of it and some alone time to wind down. Extroverts, on the other hand, wind down thru social interactions.

Just do what you can to improve your social skills and then rush.

If that is the definition of an introvert it describes me perfectly..i love my alone time. And okay thanks everyone!!!

[Jen]

Have some conversation topics ready in case things are lagging. Just a few things you can ask or question you have. That way if it feels awkward, you can chime in with something you've practiced.

Also - smile! As someone who isn't only shy and introverted, but suffers from social anxiety, I've realized that smiling and looking like you're open to other people makes a big different in how they see you. If you look like you're enjoying yourself (and you may not - rush can be hectic and taxing!) then people will see you as enjoying yourself.

Carve out time after rush events to relax and do something quiet and non-stimulating for yourself to calm down and relax and get centered again.

[33girl]

Quit calling yourself "shy." It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. You are mysterious and deep.

barbino's suggestion is great. If it still freaks you out a bit, drive to the next town over where no one knows you and do it.

Originally Posted by Jen

Have some conversation topics ready in case things are lagging. Just a few things you can ask or question you have. That way if it feels awkward, you can chime in with something you've practiced.

Also - smile! As someone who isn't only shy and introverted, but suffers from social anxiety, I've realized that smiling and looking like you're open to other people makes a big different in how they see you. If you look like you're enjoying yourself (and you may not - rush can be hectic and taxing!) then people will see you as enjoying yourself.

Carve out time after rush events to relax and do something quiet and non-stimulating for yourself to calm down and relax and get centered again.

Thank you i will try this for sure i smile anyway out of being really nervous..its an awkward smile haha.

Originally Posted by 33girl

Quit calling yourself "shy." It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. You are mysterious and deep.

barbino's suggestion is great. If it still freaks you out a bit, drive to the next town over where no one knows you and do it.

Lol i love that! Sounds very appealing. Mysterious and deep. Haha. Thank you for your help as well.

[AZTheta]

*waving* Hi Old_Row!

Watching the CWS, GC was a momentary diversion. Bye!

[Old_Row]

Originally Posted by AzTheta

*waving* Hi Old_Row!

Watching the CWS, GC was a momentary diversion. Bye!

Haha hi! That's the one!

[AZTheta]

Originally Posted by Old_Row

Haha hi! That's the one!

The OP keeps posting though and proving that she is who she thinks others believe she is.

Arizona is leading South Carolina 3-0 (end of the 4th inning) and I'm one happy Wildcat right now. Everyone comments on the "heat" in Omaha (it's like 90 degrees there) and we're all like "that's SWEATER weather, people.

[MaryPoppins]

Originally Posted by Old_Row

What does that one signature here say, something about how a PNM's recruitment problems will be solved by the second round?

That's AZTheta's signature.